Living, Loving, Breathing, Together
by Luna-Cullen14
Summary: Bella and Edward have been best friends for as long as they care to remember. But when Bella get's badly hurt, and Edward starts realizing his true feelings for her, is a best friend still what it always was? Someone you trust. Someone who trusts you.
1. Chapter 1 Pregnant

**20 years ago..**

Renee Swan entered the crowded changing room cautiously, her backpack slung onto her shoulder. The room was filled with cooing, and excited laughter, as the pregnant women exchanged stories, and felt each other's rounded bellies. It made her nervous.

Her hand reached instinctively down to her own swollen stomach, and rubbed in soothing circles. Renee took a deep breath, and swept her dirty blonde hair from her face. She could do this, it was only an hour long pregnancy aerobics class, she had been through worse. But then again, she had never been all that great at handling new situations...

She was newly wedded to the chief of police, Charlie, and living happily in the small town of Forks, WA, which suited her just fine, she didn't need any complications. A pang of guilt washed through her as she thought these words, and she looked down at her growing belly. She wanted this baby, she really did, she just didn't know how she would deal with a newborn, if she could give the child the attention it so desperately needed. What if she was a terrible mother?

Renee shook her head, and rid her mind of all the discouraging thoughts. She could do it. She could raise little Emmett by herself if she had to. She sat down on a free bench, and started to change into the comfortable sweatpants and t-shirt she had brought for the class.

On the right hand side of Renee, Esme Masen giggled as Marie Weber told her about her disastrous wedding, how the cake had fallen over, and she had been covered in chocolate icing, how someone had spiked the punch, and half the guests had ended up drunk.

She gathered her caramel hair into a loose pony, and laced up her new sneakers. She was truly happy at this point in her life, it seemed as though magic could really happen. Moving from California, to the small town of Forks had been a risky decision, but it had been worth it after all. If she hadn't moved, she would have never met her wonderful husband, Carlisle Masen, genius medical student at the University of Alaska, and she wouldn't be sitting here right now, rubbing her unusually large belly. Warmth filled her heart every time she thought of her tiny baby, her baby in her arms. What could be more magical than that? As soon as she had found out she was pregnant, she had decided on the name. Edward Anthony Masen. Perfection summed up in three words, she thought.

Lately though, she had been experiencing lower back pains, and Carlisle had suggested this aerobics class. She had agreed to try, and now here she was, sitting in the changing room, with 20 other pregnant women. She turned to the girl with dirty blond hair on her left side, and made conversation. This woman, you may have guessed, was Renee. They chatted about their babies, the due dates, told each other funny stories about their husbands, and laughed heartily. Soon, the two were getting along like old friends.

Emma Hale walked slowly across the parking lot, her round tummy making it harder to get around. Little Jasper was quite a handful already, kicking at every chance he got. This one would be a fighter. Only two months to go...thought Emma wistfully, her white blond hair blowing in the strong wind. Why had Daniel made her do this? Daniel, her new husband, had promised some aerobics would ease the pain she felt every time Jasper kicked, help her to deal with it. He was a science major after all, so she had climbed into the car this morning, feeling like she would regret it later, and drove towards the yoga studio in which the class would be held.

Finally, Emma made it to the front door, and pushed it open, escaping the cold outside. It was November in Forks, and the usually cool air had turned frigid.

The lady at the front desk welcomed her, and she went to change. As soon as she entered, she felt more comfortable. Here were 20 other women, all as pregnant as she was, and all looking just as apprehensive, even if they were laughing. She went and sat beside a woman with caramel coloured hair in a high pony tail. Emma turned to her and asked her name, she told her it was Esme, _how pretty _thought Emma. She then noticed another woman, with dirty blond hair, peeking out from behind Esme. She stuck out her hand to both of the women. "Hi, I'm Emma." She told them cheerily. The women replied, and they started to talk together.

It was like they were the same person, so alike, yet so different. Renee liked walks on the beach when the sun was setting, Esme liked to watch the sunrise from her bedroom window, but Emma preferred to make pictures out of the stars late at night. This was only one example of their connections, but let's just say that their blossoming friendship was the start of something great, and none of them had any idea what hardships and joys they would be facing together.


	2. Chapter 2 Growing

**2 years after this...**

Renee, Esme and Emma watched from comfortable lawn chairs as Carlisle and Daniel flipped burgers on the BBQ in the Masen's back yard.

"Oh Edward! Don't touch that!" called Esme frantically as she ran over to Edward and pulled him away from the prickly blackberry bush he had been reaching out to, and set him down by the small kiddie pool by Emmett and Jazzy. His little face turned down into a frown, and he whimpered as he plopped down on his bottom, his soft bronze baby hair blowing in the warm summer breeze.

Emmett and Jasper played shirtless in the tiny pool, their giggles echoing around the yard, and Charlie sat in a lawn chair close by, watching them. Emmett waved his arms, splashing Jasper with warm water, wetting his honey blond curls.

"Jazz wet!" screamed Emmett. Jasper splashed Emmett back,

"Emmy wet too!" he laughed, Edward took no notice of the pool, and always seemed to be getting in trouble. Too many times had he strayed too close to the hot BBQ, or almost fallen down the front steps. Always getting into mischief that one.

Two years had passed since that fateful day at the yoga studio, and the Masens, Hales, and Swans were all now very good friends. Emmett, Edward, and Jasper had spent all of their short little lives together, and were the best of friends. And now, an excited feeling hung in the air, for all three woman's bellies were once again large.

The first time around, all three babies had been boys, and now the women were expecting three little girls. Renee had decided that after Emmett, her little tyrant, she needed a calm, easy little darling, and had decided to call her Isabella, Bella for short. Esme had opted for her mother's name, Alice. And Emma, went elegant and had decided on Rosalie. The men were perfectly happy to let their wives choose the names, if it meant no arguing. The babies were all due this summer, Bella in June, Alice in late July, and Rosalie in early August.

**2 years after this...**

Edward, Emmett and Jasper ran ahead of their mothers, chuckling as they pushed each other aside to be in front. The four year olds raced along the shiny floors of the community mall, making as much noise as they could. But it didn't matter, for it was early Sunday morning, and the three small families were almost the only ones there.

"Jasper hun, be careful please!" called Emma as Jasper sprinted in front of Edward and Emmett, showing off his talent, he was very fast for a little boy of only four. Esme, Renee and Emma pushed stroller's along behind their sons, chatting sleepily. Father's day shopping was always done last minute, on the morning of.

Little Rosalie kicked and screamed in her seat, her shiny blond ringlets wet with angry tears. She was tired, and so very unhappy to be forced into the small stroller's confining seat, while she watched her older brother run and play.

Alice, however, munched happily on a cookie, her dark hair and eyes contrasting intensely with the lacy white dress she was wearing.

Little Bella just sat quietly, excellently behaved as always, with a smile on her face that reflected in her big brown eyes. Her short pigtails were messy and uneven on either side of her head, and her little green ensemble was already stained. Well, Renee had gotten the calm, extremely well behaved daughter she had wished for, but it had come with a very messy side. Bella just couldn't help getting messy. The three little families were as happy as ever, everything was just perfect. They all had fantastic, young children; clean, modest houses on the same street, and a healthy relationship with their spouses.

"Momma?" came Bella's tiny voice from the stroller.

"Yes dear?" answered Renee.

"What get Poppa?" she asked her mother.

Bella's speech was already very advanced for a two year old, but Alice had been making even more progress, forming full sentences, and she was quite the blabber mouth when she did get talking.

Odd friendships had sprung up everywhere, Edward was very fond of Bella, and declared her his 'favorite.' He had taken to carrying her everywhere, even though she fit awkwardly in his small arms, and played that she was his pet dog, because he said her eyes looked like a puppy's eyes. Bella enjoyed these little games, and acted along with the part, growling and barking while walking on her hands and knees. Emmett liked to play with Rosie's hair, but every time he did, she screamed loudly, and ran away from him, which left him quite discouraged. Alice followed Jasper everywhere, but he thought she was a little weird, and tended to avoid her. The families were almost always together, and even the husbands were all very good friends. Things were going wonderfully.

**5 years after this...**

It was a cloudy day in Forks. The early October wind howled and blew the colourful leaves around in circles. The Masens, Hales, and Swans had lived in peace together now for 9 years, ever since the aerobics class. But things were getting a little weird. Over the past 2 years, Renee had become reclusive, only straying outside to get groceries, or to refill the gas in the car. She barely ever saw Esme or Emma anymore, and they were getting worried. They would let themselves into the house, with home baked casseroles, and try and weedle secrets out of Renee. I'm very sorry to say that it wasn't working.

She never spent any time with her children any more, nine year old Emmett spent more time than ever over at Jasper's or Edward's, avoiding his home life, and seven year old Bella was quieter than usual, her silky brown hair was never up in its signature pig tails anymore. Everyone had to wonder what was wrong with Renee. They found out that cloudy morning.

Esme, Emma, Emmett, Bella and Charlie stared as she loaded suitcases into her car, tears streaming down her face. No one stopped her, no one asked her what she was doing. Bella didn't understand, and reached for her father. Her scooped her up and placed her on his hip like he used to do when she was younger. Emmett however, understood what his mother was doing, and stood stock still, fists clenched, holding back tears. Always the strong one.

Renee hopped into the car, and started the engine. Bella squirmed out from Charlie's arms, and ran to the car, as fast as her little legs could carry her. No one stopped her either.

"Momma!" she called desperately,

"Momma! Where are you going? Don't leave!" she pleaded, her big brown eyes shining with tears. Renee stopped, and rolled down the car window. She stroked Bella's cheek, wiping away her tears, and then pulled out of the driveway, and down the road, never to be seen again.

Bella ran after the car, calling out her mother's name, and tripping over her own feet. She collapsed in the middle of the road, and Emmett ran to her. He pulled her up gently and helped her back over to the yard, where everyone was waiting. Esme and Emma stood still, shocked looks on their faces. Their best friend had left. How could she do this? To her family? To her children? No one knew what to do. Emma spotted a piece of paper lying on the ground in the driveway. She knelt down and picked it up, and recognized Renee's untidy scrawl, so she started to read it out loud.

_Dear Charlie, Bella, Emmett, Emma, and Esme,_

_I'm very sorry. I can't do this anymore. I wish there was something I could do, some way I could heal myself. But I've tried everything I can think of, and nothing is working. I feel like I'm in despair, stuck deep down in a dark hole, where no one can reach me. Please carry on without me, go along with your normal lives, live them to the fullest. Bella, you're a beautiful young lady, and can become anything you want to be, don't let anybody stand in your way. I love you. Emmett, keep climbing higher, keep trying, and striving to be the best you can be. I love you. Charlie, you are the best husband a woman could ask for. I'm sorry I couldn't hold up my side of the bargain. Find someone who loves you as much as I do, find someone who can be a mother to my babies. I love you. Esme and Emma, you two are the best friends I've ever had. You are blessed with lovely, intelligent, caring souls, please be there for my children when they need a mother, you always have been, don't stop now. I know Edward and Jasper will grow up to be strong, independent men, and Rose and Alice will become beautiful, smart ladies who can hold their own. I love you both. I love you all. _

_Forgive me,_

_-Renee_

By the end of the letter, almost everyone was in tears, except for Bella, who only looked lost, and Emmett, who was afraid to cry. Even Charlie's cheeks were wet with tears. Somehow, after what felt like hours, Charlie brought Bella and Emmett inside, and Esme and Emma headed home to tell their families the bad news. They could make it, if they had each other, they could get through this obstacle together.


	3. Chapter 3 10 years later

**10 years later...**

BELLA POV

I wrapped the new scarf Esme had knitted me for Christmas around my neck, and headed out the door, burying my head inside my jacket. The wind whistled, and blew my brown hair around my face, making my eyes water. January in Forks. I walked briskly down the street to Edward and Alice's house, hoping Esme had made some of her signature hot cocoa. I really needed some. The heat in my house had burst, and I was home alone. Em was out with Jasper somewhere, and Dad was at work, being the police chief was no easy job. Shivering in my silent house, the closest place I could think of to go was the Masens.

I rapped on the dark mahogany door, and was welcomed by Edward, who ushered me in. He closed the door behind me, and shivered.

"Hey Bells! Jesus! It must be at least negative ten out there!" he said, locking the door.

"Hey Masen, and it's more like negative fifteen!" I smiled at my best friend. He had been my best friend since I was born, Esme and Emma told us that he used to pretend I was his dog, and that I would go barking around the neighborhood on my knees while Edward pretended to walk me, while singing songs he had made up. I laughed at the memories. He was very close to me, we shared everything, and knew everything about the other.

"Oh yeah?" he challenged,

"Wanna bet?" he asked me.

"You bet your butt I wanna bet!" I said, laughing at my funny sentence.

We raced upstairs to his room, to check the thermometer that he kept by his window.

His room was as messy as always, clothing thrown everywhere, guitar picks on the ground, an unmade bed, and crumpled sheets of music that hadn't worked overflowing in the garbage. The only part of the room that wasn't messy was the corner where he kept his guitar. His prized vintage Les Paul, gleaming and shiny, from being polished so often. Edward loved his music like it was his own child, and there were severe punishments to anyone who touched his guitar without asking. Even me.

We checked the temperature, and I won, as always. He sighed and we went downstairs, where Esme stirred a pot of soup on the stove, and Alice painted her nails at the table.

"Hey Alice!" I called to her.

"Bella!" she called back, running over to embrace me, her dark pixie like hair bouncing with her every movement. She hugged me tightly, smelling like her favorite Pina Colada scented shampoo. We had been babies together, and she was like my sister.

"How are Emmett and Charlie, Bella?" asked Esme as she wiped her hands on a dish towel.

"They're all great, thanks." I told her, and went over to embrace the woman who had been a second mother to me after my own mother left us. She meant so much to me.

"Want some soup?" she asked me, and a delicious smell wafted over in my direction.

"Mmm sounds great, Esme." I told her, and she filled me a bowl.

It was amazing, hot and creamy, as it rolled down my throat, almost burning, but not quite.

"So why are you here anyways?" asked Alice, "You said yesterday you had a ton of homework."

I groaned, remembering my pile of homework, waiting for me at home.

"My heat shut off, so I decided to come here, I completely forgot about my homework." I told them, ashamed.

"I can help you, I've already finished all mine." said Edward, beaming at me.

I scowled at him, the smarty-pants, musical genius, child prodigy.

"Of course you have."

Sure, I huffed and puffed about all his talents, but I still loved him. He was my best friend, and always would be, no matter what.

"Fine, you can help...a little." I told him, smiling a small smile.

He laughed. "Yay!"

I rolled my eyes at him as he rushed upstairs to get his jacket. I brought my empty bowl over to the sink, and thanked Esme once more. Edward slid down the banister, wearing his favorite ACDC sweatshirt, and carrying his jacket on his arm. He slid it on and we headed out the door to get some work done before the weekend was over.

ESME POV

I watched as Bella came down the stairs with Edward, debating about who had won their latest bet. I wondered what it was about this time. She greeted myself and Alice with warmth, smiling her beautiful smile.

I thought of her as my own daughter, and in a way she was. Renee had asked me to take care of her Isabella, and I had promised myself I wouldn't let her down. Emma and I had thrown ourselves into making Emmett and Bella's life alright, after what they had gone through. Charlie had done an amazing job of pulling himself through his wife's absence, and had taken on the responsibility of being a single father. We helped him along the way of course, and our three families hardly went a day without seeing each other. We shared something special, it was as though we were all related, all one.

Emmett had turned out massive and strong, with muscles on top of his muscles, but inside he was a big teddy bear, who hoped to travel. Edward had an amazing gift for music, was obsessed with being gentlemanly, and was off to Juliard next year. Alice had a knack for fashion, and had already thrown herself into her future career, filling sketchbook after sketchbook with drawings of her visions. Jasper was a master at soccer, but didn't intend to take his talent and need for speed any further than that. He had aspirations of joining the military. Rosalie didn't know where she was going in her life yet, but we all thought she should become a hairdresser and open up a salon in New York, the creations she fashioned on top of our heads... And then there was Bella, clumsy and uncoordinated, beautiful and funny, and oh so modest. What she did with machines was amazing. She could fix the smokiest engine, and find the quirks in them no one else saw. She wasn't confident with her talent, unconvinced it could take her anywhere. She was set on becoming a journalist. Carlisle was perfect, the blood that kept my heart pumping. And Emma, soft and beautiful, was my best friend, my one source of light. This was my family, all unique and different in their own ways. I smiled to myself, content in every way.

EDWARD POV

It was Monday morning, and Bella and I were waiting outside the school, almost frozen. I had helped her with all her homework yesterday, easy peasy. I had watched her struggle for a while, than had taken over, doing it for her. Bella huddled up against me, her arms wrapped around my waist, and mine around hers as we kept each other warm. She shivered. I looked down at my best friend, into those bright puppy dog eyes, and smiled.

"Hey Bella? You're making me shiver."

"To bad Edward, I'm cold, and you're warmer than me, so I get to hug you." she said playfully.

Everyone at school thought we were dating, the way we interacted, but we had told them countless times we were best friends. No one believed us.

Mike Newton, the school jack ass, wanted Bella to himself, but every time he asked her out, she said no. Emmett and I had sworn that if he ever hurt her, we would be the ones to deal with.

Bella was like my own sister, connected to me in a way I couldn't explain. From the moment she was born, I knew I had to be with her, have her beside me, forever.

The bell finally rang and we walked inside, shivering our heads off.

I hated school, and I was 19, I shouldn't even have to go through with it anymore, but Forks High School offered one more grade, to prepare you for college, and my mother had made me take it, along with Emmett and Jazz.

I sighed, as we reached Bella's locker, waited for her to unload everything, and take out what she needed, then we made our way over to my own locker. Alice was already at the locker beside mine, putting on her makeup in the tiny square locker mirror.

"Boo!" I scared her, and she jumped, scowling at me.

"Ed! You messed up my face!" she squealed.

"Oh Ali, your face was already messed up!" I told her in a joking tone.

She scowled at me again, and stalked off in the opposite direction, probably to find Rose.

Bella laughed at the scene we had just made, and shook her head at Alice.

"That was mean you know." she told me, smiling.

"Oh trust me, I know...Bellie." I responded, using her most unliked nickname.

"Edward Masen do not call me Bellie!" she yelled, and people walking in the hallways stopped to look.

I snickered, and grabbed her hand to lead her to biology. She wasn't going to get there by herself huffing and puffing like that.

I dropped her off at her class and ran to mine, hurrying to get my favorite spot at the back.


	4. Author's Note

**A/N**

**Hey Everybody! Thanks for all the great reviews, and cool advice! Sorry the next chapter is taking a little bit longer than expected, but It will be coming up soon! Hope nobody has given up on me! Not yet! Hahaha I'll update soon, promise.**

**Luna-Cullen14**


	5. Chapter 4 Journal

**SO SO SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG!!! I was super busy, vacations and work! Sorry guys! But here it is now, review pls? Thanks! Everything eblong to our dearest Stephenie!**

JASPER POV

Damn. I was almost late for practice. I pulled on my jersey and grabbed a water bottle from the fridge, then hurried out the door. I climbed into my ugly old Honda, and pulled out of the driveway, sighing. Late again. Coach was going to kill me... I arrived at the field ten minutes late, and tried to sneak into practice without being noticed, but unfortunately, my coach spotted me.

"You, HALE!" he called. I froze and turned around slowly.

"Yes...coach?"

"Late AGAIN Jasper?" he demanded.

"Sorry sir..." I apologized quietly.

"Not impressed, boy."

"Yes sir."

His face turned a nasty shade of red, and he kicked me a ball. "How do expect us to win without our best player coming to practice?" he asked me.

"But sir, I'm here now."

"Jasper pick it up, you've got to keep better track of time."

"Yes, sir"

"Now go! Work those legs!" he screamed at me. I hurried onto the turf, and started dribbling, paying close attention to my ankle, which I had twisted yesterday, hiking with Emmett. I took a wide shot at the goal, and it sailed through, missing the goalie's head by inches. Yes!

I raced down the field, catching a rogue ball on my head, and bouncing it up into the air. I chuckled as I sped across the turf, enjoying the feeling on wind on my skin. I had always loved running. I was high school track star, and the fastest on my team.

Soon, practice was over, and I went home. Rose was already there, sitting on the couch flipping through a magazine, the school day had just finished.

"Hey Rosie!" I called to her, as I went into the kitchen to grab a granola bar.

"Hey Jazz..." she said distractedly, paying more attention to her magazine.

"Where's Mom and Dad?" I asked, wondering where they could be, they were ususally home at this time of day.

"It's their anniversary, remember?" said Rose in a scathing tone, closing her magazine. "They went off to dinner or something."

Right, their anniversary, how could I have forgotten? I chuckled to myself and headed out to by them at least a card. I had almost closed the front door, when Rosalie called to me.

"Don't forget we're at Em and Bella's house tonight, Mom and Dad are gone for the weekend."

I rolled my eyes and closed the door, I wouldn't forget.

BELLA POV

I sat at the kitchen table in my small kitchen, flipping through the flyers that had arrived in the newspaper. I was bored, and there was nothing to do. Emmett sat, vegging off in front of the T.V, and Dad wasn't home yet. All I had to do was wait for Jazz and Rose. They were sleeping here tonight, due to Emma and Daniel's anniversary, even though they really didn't need supervision, being 17 and 19 years old. Nevertheless, Emma worried constantly, so she sent them here. Rose and Jasper didn't mind too much, our house was basically their house too.

I sighed, and made my way upstairs to my room, I could find something to do up there. Sure enough, I came face to face with a horrible mess. With another sigh, I started picking up items from the floor and putting them in their rightful places. I emptied out my drawers and re-organized them, folding everything carefully. I didn't know why I was wasting time like this, they would just get messy again in the next week. But I felt better when I had finished, everything looked so nice and clean.

Just then, I jumped as the sound of the doorbell echoed through the house. I bounded down the stairs, and opened the door for Jasper and Rosalie. They smiled, even though they were shivering severely. I ushered them in, and they took off their damp jackets. I hugged them both.

"Hey Bella, where's Emmett?" asked Jasper, looking around me.

"He's in the living room." I told him.

He ruffled my hair, mussing it up. "Thanks kid."

I rolled my eyes, and took Rose by the hand, leading her upstairs. We plopped down on my bed and she giggled. "So Bella...guess who likes you?" she said sneakily, smiling at me. I gasped, damn Rose! She knew everything!

"Who?" I asked eagerly, hopefully it wasn't Mike again.

She bit her lip, holding back hysterical laughter. "Spit it out Rose." I told her.

"James Benna!" she almost shrieked.

I gasped, and smiled. She had to be kidding. James Benna was perhaps the most popular, cutest guy in our grade. He was athletic, funny, and totally out of my league.

"You've got to be kidding me!" I yelled at her, grinning crazily.

"Nope, completely serious." she said, no trace of joking on her beautiful face.

I screamed and hugged her, jumping up and down. Totally unlike me, what was I doing? Going insane over a guy? No, I had to keep my head screwed on tight. I stopped jumping, and calmed myself down, taking deep breaths. What Rosalie did next didn't help at all.

"He's asking you out Monday." she said quietly.

I froze, not taking in the situation. Shoot. Yeah, James Benna was one of the cutest guys in school, but he was also Edward's enemy. They had never gotten along, not since sophomore year, when they had gotten into a serious fist fight over Samantha Jericho. James had walked away with a broken rib, and Edward with a broken nose. They glared at each other in the hallways, and never missed a chance to sneak I snide comments about the other. What was I going to do? Rosalie seemed to realize this fact at the same time as I did, sucking in her breath.

"Damn...what are we going to do?" she asked me, staring hopelessly at the ceiling. We both knew Edward would be none too pleased. I thought it over in my head, who was more important to me, Edward or James? The answer was obviously Edward, but I had to be insane to refuse a date with James Benna. Most girls would give almost anything to be the one in my position. But I couldn't lose my best friend fighting over a stupid guy.

I groaned, falling backwards onto my pillows, why did Edward have to hate James so much?

The doorbell rang and I went to open the door, Rosalie on my heels. Edward stood there, dripping wet and soaked to the bone, shivering beyond belief. His lips were blue and he had ice crystals in his bronze hair.

"Oh Edward!" I said worriedly, "Come inside! Quick!" he came in and I closed the door behind him. What had he been doing to get this cold. "Uhh..Emmett?" I called to my brother across the house.

"What Bella?" he said in an annoyed voice, obviously not happy to be torn away from his T.V.

"Could you get Edward some of your dry clothes please? He's soaked." I told him, and Edward tried to smile, but his numb face prevented it. I shook my head at him as Emmett rushed upstairs to get Edward something to wear.

"What happened?" I asked him, my voice anxious.

"C-can I explain l-l-later?" he shivered, and I nodded. He was obviously unable to form full sentences.

Emmett arrived with a clean dry t-shirt and some sweatpants, warm and cozy. Edward took off his heavy jacket and went into the washroom to change. I stared quizzically after him. What could he have been doing?

He emerged with the sweatpants on, pulling the shirt over his head. His chest was white with cold. It made me shiver just looking at it.

"Edward are you okay?" I asked him, as I ran over and hugged him around the waist. Brr...he was still cold.

"I'm f-f-fine." he said, his stutter not quite gone. I put a kettle on the stove, making tea for him. I had never seen anyone this cold.

When the tea was ready I passed him a large mug, and he took a grateful sip, smiling up at me. His lips were no longer blue.

"Thanks Bells." he said, now gulping down the hot liquid.

"No problem Masen, so what happened?" I asked him.

He smiled like he was embarrassed, his cheeks turning only slightly pink. "Well..." he said, avoiding my gaze.

"Spit it out Edward." I told him, just as I had with Rosalie before.

He took a deep breath, and began.

"I bought you that green journal you wanted, you know the one in the bookstore?" I just nodded. "Just as a late Christmas gift, and I was on my way over here to give it to you." I smiled at him, what could have happened next? "I was walking through the park and I put the journal down on the side of the fountain, so that I could toss in a penny." He bit his lip, and frowned. "My knee hit the journal and it fell into the fountain! I didn't know what else to do! You had wanted that journal so badly..." I urged him to go on. "Well I jumped into the fountain, and tried to get it out, but by the time I had finally managed to fish it out, it was destroyed, and my hands felt like they were about to fall off." I smiled slightly at him, he had done that? For me?

"I'm sorry..." he finished, looking down at the table.

"No Edward...don't be sorry, it's not your fault." I told him, but he had his head in his hands on the table, shaking it from side to side. I shivered with the thought of him in that fountain, it was a pretty large one, and all iced over, Edward had probably had to break the ice, and almost swim to get to my journal. He could have been seriously injured, caught pneumonia or something.

"Yea Bella, it is, I'm so sorry..." he told me, this face was not the usual happy one I was used too.

"Edward don't feel bad, no one could have prevented it, and I'm just glad your not hurt. My best friend's life is more important to me than a journal." I smiled at him.

He smiled too and got up to give me a huge hug. I loved Edward's hugs, so warm and encircling, so comforting and safe. I nuzzled into him, wrapping my arms around my own personal teddy bear.

ROSALIE POV

When were they going to realize that they were perfect for each other? They knew everything about the other, and spent every second of the day together, they knew how to make the other happy, or make them laugh. And still, they kept on acting like best friends, even though most people saw something more. I watched Edward hug Bella, and marveled at the intensity of their relationship, what had made it so strong? Of course, I knew the answer. Edward had been attached to Bella since her birth, never letting her out of his sight, when Renee had left, Bella went to Edward for comfort, and stayed at his house almost every night. Edward knew how to cheer her up every time she was feeling sad about her mother, knew how to take her mind off it. These experiences, hardships and quirks, seemed to sew them together, like they were a patchwork quilt.

I looked at Edward's eyes, and the way he tenderly touched Bella's face as he hugged her. I couldn't help thinking that maybe he felt something else also, maybe he was realizing it. But Bella seemed completely oblivious, just happy to be in Edward's arms. Poor guy. She had absolutely no interest in him that way.

As they broke apart, and Bella skipped off to find her brother, I walked by Edward, following Bella's trail. I whispered in his ear "Don't worry, she'll come around someday." He looked confused for a moment, but I was already walking away. But then, a sense of understanding dawned on his perfect face, and his smile lit up the whole room. He hugged me lightly from behind,

"Thanks Rose." Yes, he definitely saw something more.

The night passed quickly, Edward left, only after being fed more hot tea, and bundled up in all of Emmett's jackets and hats. Bella made him wear a scarf, even if he complained he looked stupid.

Jazz and Emmett eventually retired to Emmett's room, who knows what they were doing in there, and Bella and I set up our beds in her room. I was dead tired, and fell asleep almost immediately, but not without wondering what Bella was going to do about James Benna. Edward would be crushed.


	6. Chapter 5 Smarties

Hey Guys! I'm so sorry this took so long! I've been SUPER BUSY!!! ANYWAYS. Here it is, and I hope you like it! Reviews maybe??

**Everything belongs to S.M 3**

BELLA POV

I woke up beside Rose, her thick blond hair tickling my nose. I rolled over, stretching to my full length in bed, and groaned. It was Sunday. I had work on Sundays. I climbed out of my warm covers and shivered in the morning cold. I quickly took a shower and got dressed, pulling on some sweatpants, a t-shirt and a heavy sweater. I shook Rosalie awake, she frowned at me.

"What?" she said, grumbling.

"I gotta go to work, kay? Can you check on Edward today? I don't have time, but I want to make sure he's okay...you know, make sure he doesn't have pneumonia." I said worriedly. Rosalie waved me off.

"He's fine Bella..I'm sure." she said closing her eyes again.

"Rose!" I said sharply, glaring at her.

"Fine..whatever...I'll do it." she said, turning over. I sighed in gratitude, and closed the door quietly behind me. I hated working at Newton's Outfitters, but it had to be done, I needed money. The worst part were the days when Mike was there, constantly talking, and asking me out on numerous occasions. I headed downstairs, scarfed down a granola bar, and grabbed my work bag, all the while dialing Edward's number. I held the phone with my shoulder as I went out into the freezing cold, and fumbled to unlock my truck door.

"Bella?" he answered, sleepily.

"Hey, good morning sleepy head!" I said, chuckling. He groaned on the other end of the phone.

"Good morning, beautiful. You know it's only like 8 right?" he asked me.

"Yup, I have work." I said, holding the phone normally now as I hoisted myself into the cab of my chevy. I started the engine, reving it a couple times, warming it up.

"Oh." he yawned.

"Are you okay? I was worried when you left last night."

"I'm okay I guess. My mom made me some soup, and won't let me get out of bed until 12, which suits me fine." he said, and I knew he was smiling on the other end of the phone. I giggled.

"Okay, sounds good. I'm sending Rosalie over to check on you later anyways." I said.

"Ugh, Rose? Why can't it be you?" he complained.

"Because I'm working silly, remember?"

"Oh yeah." he said, yawning again.

"Okay, go back to sleep Masen. I'll come by after work, at around 7?" I said, pulling out of my driveway.

"Can't wait. See ya, Bells." he said, yawning and hanging up. I smiled, chuckling to myself, and driving along the highway. Even the inside of my truck was literally frozen, and my hands were numb on the steering wheel. I cranked the heat, shivering. By the time I arrived at Newton's, the truck had warmed up considerably, and stepping out into the cold was a shock. I rubbed my hands together and breathed on them to warm them up as I braced myself against the cold, walking up to the front of the store. I entered, and warmth surrounded me. Smiling, I peeled off my jacket and hung it on a hook behind the counter, and then pulled on my Newton's smock. The store was empty, not being open yet, and everything was placed in a unified way on the shelves, nothing close to what it looked like at the end of the day. Sigh, the end of the day. It was so far away, I had a long shift today and would only be finished at 7. came around the corner just then, adjusting her hair.

"Oh Bella! You're here, that's great. I'm going to have to ask you to mind the store for a couple hours, I have some errands to run, is that alright?" She asked, bustling about gathering her things.

"That's fine ." I said agreeably.

"Oh good. And we're closing at three today, due to low stocks, we won't be getting new stuff in until tomorrow." She informed me, and I grinned.

"Awesome." I said, smiling. This way I could surprise Edward. She smiled gratefully and left the store, climbing into her shiny Mercedes. I fixed my name tag lazily, and switched the Closed sign to Open. I sat behind the counter, pulling Wuthering Heights from my bag, and preparing for a boring day.

I only saw about a dozen customers through the whole 6 hours I had been at Newtons. I checked the watch around my wrist and gasped, it was three thirty already, I was supposed to leave half an hour ago. I cursed and flew around the store, organizing items that had been misplaced, and straightening displays. I pulled off my smock and shoved it beneath the desk, pulling on my heavy jacket. I switched the sign back to Closed, and opened the glass door that led outside. Shivering, I climbed quickly into my truck, and started the engine. I could see my breath, and I drove quickly in the direction of Edward's house. I pulled up in their spacious driveway, and hopped out, worried about Edward. I knocked quickly, dancing with cold from one foot to the other. To my intense relief, Carlisle opened the door, and pulled me inside.

"Bella!" He said, looking concerned.

"Hi Carlisle, I'm just here to see Edward." I said, smiling and relishing the warmth of their house. A worried look crossed his face, and he hesitated.

"He's not here right now. We took him to the hospital this morning." He said, biting his lip.

"What?! No one called me?!" I shouted, angry and scared.

"Bella, calm down. He's okay. He has pneumonia, and when that happens the patient is supposed to be under proffesional care." He said, looking serious.

"Why couldn't he stay here? You're a doctor!" I said, bewildered.

"Yes, but all my material is at the hospital." He said, grabbing his coat from the rack. "Come on, I'll take you to see him. He's been asking for you all day, and is incredibly bored." I nodded, and followed him outside to the car. The only other time Edward had been in the hospital was when we were 12, and he had broken his leg. The doctor had let me stay with him and watch them put on the cast. I remember that time so well, I barely slept, and when I wasn't at school, I was with him at the hospital, playing monopoly. He insisted on being the car, because that way "he didn't need legs to get around" I slapped him when he said this, and told him he would always have legs, because if he didn't, then he couldn't press the piano pedals. This shut him up.

Carlisle drove silently, and his car was warm and comforting. I was the first to break the silence.

"Carlisle, what happens when you have pneumonia?" I asked.

"It means the little sacs filled with air inside his lungs are filled with fluid, and it makes it hard to breathe." He said, looking straight ahead. I breathed in sharply, and tried to calm myself down. He was going to be okay. We pulled up in front of the hospital, and I hopped immediately out of the car, my stomach knotting with worry. Carlisle led me inside, and waved at the secretary.

"Good afternoon ." She said politely, nodding. I followed Carlisle down a variety of hallways, and into a section labeled "Pneumatic Ward". We turned into one of the rooms.

"Beautiful." Said a weak voice. It was a voice I would know anywhere. "You came." He lay on a hospital cot, propped up with pillows, and layered with blanket after blanket. His pale face was even whiter, and he had circles under his eyes. An I.V was attached to his arm, and was dripping steadily. A tear rolled down my cheek, seeing him like this, and I rushed to his side.

"Oh Edward!" I said, leaning down and hugging him tightly. He chuckled, and wrapped his arms around me as much as he could. I burried my face in his neck, and cried softly, not wanting to let go. Carlisle smiled, and left silently. I sniffled, and Edward scooted over, motioning for me to lay beside him. I did so willingly, curling into our signature sleepover position, tucked against him. My face lay on his shoulder, and there was a wet spot from my crying.

"Don't cry Bella. I'm fine, just sick." He said, stroking my hair.

"I know, it's just scary seeing you like this." I told him.

"I know Bells, I couldn't imagine seeing you this way." He breathed, a disgruntled look crossing his features. I smoothed the lines between his eyebrows, and smiled.

"Edward?" I looked up at him.

"Mmm?"

"Remember when you broke your leg, and you had to come here, and we sat just like this, playing monopoly?" I asked him.

"How could I forget?" He said, chuckling.

"Well I was thinking maybe we should do that again." I said, and he smiled.

"I'm game." He said, grinning.

"Okay, I'll get it." I said excitedly, leaping up out of the cot. The board games were in the patient lounge, down the hall, and I remembered how to get there from last time we played.

"Bella wait! I want to come! I've been laying in bed all day, and the nurse said I could take short walks if I'm bundled up and with somebody." He said, innocently. I giggled.

"Okay sick boy, come on." I said, helping him sit up in the bed. He breathed in. Just then, a young nurse walked in.

", are you taking a walk? Who's this?" She asked pleasantly, gesturing to me.

"Oh hi Melanie." He said, flashing her a dazzling smile. I rolled my eyes. "This is my best friend, Bella." He said.

"Hello Bella." The nurse said, looking at me strangely. "Do you need me to help with detaching the I.V for a while ?"

"Yes please, Melanie." Edward said, sighing. She took it out, and then plastered a fake smile on her face, walking out of the room. I helped Edward stand up, and wrapped a fleecy blanket around his shoulders. He smiled down at me. "Thanks Bells, it feels good to be standing." He said, looking happy.

"Good! So let's go Masen." I said, smiling back at him. He shuffled forward slowly, we linked arms, and I led him at his own pace down the hallway. He was attracting looks as we made our way there, as much as I hated to say it about my best friend, I wasn't afraid to admit that he was drop dead gorgeous, and he knew it. He didn't flaunt it though, he just knew how to get what he wanted.

We arrived at the lounge, and I opened up the game cupboard. I searched through the games, but couldn't find the one I wanted. I groaned in frustration.

"Edward it's not here!" I said, frowning.

"Bella, look." He said, pointing to a table where three children sat. They looked about 7, and we're all wearing hospital robes like Edward's. One was bald, and the other two looked very weak and waxy. My heart melted. They were playing monopoly.

"Oh the poor things!" I exclaimed. "We can't take it away from them!"

"Then we'll just have to wait!" Edward said, grinning, pulling me slowly towards a cozy looking couch, and sitting down. I sat down close beside him.

"Are you feeling okay?" I asked him, my hand on his forehead. He swatted me away, rolling his eyes.

"Yes Bella, I'm fine. Stop worrying." He said.

"Ya right, I'm not going to stop worrying until you're completely better." I said. He leaned into me.

"Thanks Bells." He said.

"It's what best friends do." I said, giggling. Just then, Carlisle walked in. He saw us, and walked in our direction.

"Hey guys, I was wondering, Alice wants to know if you want anything, she's in the cafeteria now." He asked us. Edward and I looked at each other, and smiled.

"Smarties!" We said in unison. We had a thing for Smarties, every chance we got we ate them, we even seperated the colours. I only ate the purple, green, orange and brown ones, and he would eat the blue, yellow, red and pink.

"I shouldn't have asked." Carlisle said, rolling his eyes.

"Thanks Carlisle." I said.

"Thanks Dad." Edward echoed. Carlisle chuckled.

"No problem kids, Alice will be down soon." He said, checking something on his clipboard, before hurrying away. Edward sighed, leaning back into the couch and closing his eyes.

"Tired?" I asked, and he nodded. I snuggled into his side, and waited. Before I knew it, his breath grew even and calm, and I smiled, he was sleeping like a baby. I was content in the position I was in, and decided not to wake him by adjusting. I played with the hole in the knee of my jeans, and waited for Alice. She arrived shortly, prancing over to us. She grinned, and held out a box of smarties to me.

"Thanks Alice, I love you." I said quietly, not wanting to wake Edward.

"No problem Bella." She said, planting a kiss on Edward's forehead, and skipping off. I opened the box of Smarties, and peered inside. Looks like Edward hit the jackpot this time, there was alot of yellow. He woke up, and smiled sleepily.

"Yum." He said, as I popped a blue one into his mouth.

"Have a nice 10 minute nap?" I asked him, and he nodded.

"Let's see the results." He said, gesturing to the Smarties.

"You won this time." I said, dumping them out onto the table in front of us. We sorted them into their respectful groups, and proceeded to eat them quickly, unable to resist. My glance strayed over the table where the kids had been playing monopoly before, and it was now empty. I squirmed out from underneath Edward's arm, and hurried to the cupboard. I grabbed the game and raced back over to the couch where we were sitting.

"Finally!" He exclaimed, taking the game from my hands as I sat back down. He set it on the table, and opened the dog eared box. This game was an old one, and I can't ever remember it being new. He unfolded the game board, and gasped.

"Bella, It's still here." He said, pointing to a spot on the black back of the board. It was the spot where we had carved our names, and written 'Best Friends Forever' underneath it. I smiled, touching it with my fingers. His writing was tidy and blocky, and mine was messy and loopy.

Thanks guys! BTW the kids that were playing monopoly had leukemia

**xox**


	7. Chapter 6 Memories

HEY EVERYONE!! THANKS FOR BEING PATIENT! This chapter is dedicated to background story, and there is MANY MANY flashbacks.

*****

EDWARD POV

She held the little silver terrier in her hands, and I remembered back to the time we were twelve, and had engraved our names on the board.

"I got the car again Bella!" I said triumphantly. She was tucked under my arm as usual, even though we were only twelve at the time, it was a comfortable position for us, it worked. The game was on my lap, and my bandaged leg stuck out at a raised angle.

"No fair, you always get it!" She said, frowning.

"Sorry Bells, snooze you lose." I said. Carlisle poked his head around the corner.

"You guys okay?" He asked us. We nodded, and he left us alone.

"Fine." Bella sighed, her breath tickling me. "I'll be the dog."

"It suits you." I said, thinking of our earlier days, when we had pretended she was a puppy. She groaned, and smiled despite herself, opening up the game board. I glanced to my side, and impulsively grabbed Esme's keys that were sitting on the bedside table. I flipped the board over, and began to write.

"Edward wha-" Bella began, before she saw what I was doing. I carved my name slowly and neatly, in block print. She smiled as I added a plus sign beneath it. I passed the keys to her, and she giggled. "We'll get in trouble." She said.

"No we won't, trust me. And besides, what are they going to do, call the police because we wrote on a board? I don't think so." I said, smiling. She shrugged, and began to carve her name beneath mine. Her writing was messy but readable, embroidered with curls and loops along the way. She finished, and began to write something else. I had intended it just to be our names, and craned my neck to see what else she was writing, curious. She was writing "Best Friends Forever" underneath our names. I smiled as she passed the board back to me. I carved a neat "2004" underneath. She grinned.

"Now everyone will know that this is our board." I said, happily.

"Best Friends." She said.

"Forever and ever." I added, and we proceeded to play the game...

It was one of the many memories I had with Bella, who was now organizing the cards into their piles onto the board. I sighed, and stared at her, since she wasn't looking in my direction. Her deep mahogany hair fell in soft curls around her face, and her slender waist was bent over the table, trying to get the piles perfectly aligned. She knew I thought she was beautiful, since I had taken up calling her that when we had turned 14, and she had told me she felt ugly. I didn't know how anyone could think of her as ugly. She was the most gorgeous creature ever to walk this earth, and I intended to make sure she knew it. She was used to the nickname by now, but I still saw her cheeks turn a beautiful shade of light pink when I said it. I knew she was my best friend, and she always would be, no matter what, but lately, I had been feeling strange. My heart lurched when she did the smallest things, like tuck her hair behind her ear, or bite her lip. It was weird, and I wasn't quite sure how to place it yet. I would not fall in love with Bella. With that thought, another memory came to mind.

We were 14, and sitting at the top of the ferris wheel. Bella held a melting ice cream in her hand, and was staring out into the sunset. I was looking at her, wondering what was wrong, I could always tell when something was wrong. The workers below were trying to fix the bug that had caused the ferris wheel to stop, and I hoped they would take their time.

"What's wrong Bells?" I asked softly.

"I got a letter from my mom today." She said, still staring forwards. Her mother had always been a touchy subject.

"What did it say?" I asked her.

"She said she wasn't coming back for Christmas this year, like she did last year, and that she didn't want us to contact her. She said we shouldn't have tried." She said, looking down.

"Oh Bella." I said, and she leaned against me, sighing.

"Love sucks, Edward." She said, sniffling as a tear rolled down her cheek. I couldn't stand seeing her sad. We were connected unexplainably, and her pain caused me pain. I wiped the tear away.

"Yeah it does, beautiful." I said quietly.

"I'm never going to fall in love. Ever." She said sadly.

"Me neither." I agreed, quite certain.

"Pinky promise?" She asked, holding out her thin finger. I locked it with mine, and she smiled, leaning back into me as the ferris wheel started to move again...

I was shaken out of my memories by Bella waving her hand in front of my face.

"Edward? Is zoning out a side effect of pneumonia?" She asked, giggling. I shook my head to get back to the present.

"Sorry Bells." I smiled.

"Ready to play?" She asked me, holding out the dice for me to take. I nodded, and rolled a 5. She rolled a 6.

"Damn, you get to go first." I said. She gave me an evil glare, waggling her eyebrows, and rolled again. She got a 3, sighed, and moved the spaces on the board. "Baltic Avenue. Wanna buy it?" I asked her. She shook her head no, and passed the dice to me. I rolled a 4 and moved.

"HAHA Income Tax! Pay up Edward." She said, smiling. I groaned, and paid the money. The game continued on, I stayed away from the railroads because I knew Bella liked owning them, and bought the utilities instead. We had always thought the normal properties were boring. We finished the game an hour later, and I had to tell her I was pooped. I was literally falling asleep on the board. She put it away, and giggled, helping me up, and supporting me as we walked down the hall again. I was so grateful for her being here. We reached my room, and I lay down quickly, covering myself with blankets. She lay down beside me, and snuggled into my side, closing her eyes.

"Bella? How are you getting home?" I asked, concerned.

"Emmett's coming." She said. I sighed happily, able to drift off to sleep now.

"Goodnight Bells, sleep tight." I said, yawning.

"Goodnight Edward...Don't let the bed bugs bite." She said back, smiling. With this, I drifted off into sleep, and was confronted with another memory.

We were 8 years old, and it was the middle of the night. Bella was over at my house again, to afraid to sleep in the house her mother left her in. She was a wreck these past months, almost never eating, and refusing to leave my side for a minute. She slept here every night, and wore sweaters that were down to her knees, her deep brown hair flying away. Now, we lay side by side as usual, drifting off to sleep. The trouble was her nightmares that came everynight, causing her to whimper and cry out. I would wake up in the morning and my fingers would be purple from her crushing them unconciously with hers.

"Edward?" She said softly.

"Yeah Bells?" My eight year old self asked.

"Are you asleep yet?" She asked me, sniffling.

"Not yet." I told her quietly.

"What should I dream about?" She asked.

"Far away places. Imagine what they would look like." I said, wondering myself. She was silent for a while, before talking again.

"Edward? Will we go to far away places when we're older? Like Africa?" She asked, sounding excited.

"We will I think. Together." I told her, confidently.

"Good. I thought so." She said, confirming.

"Goodnight Bella. Sleep tight." I said, smiling.

"Goodnight Edward, don't let the bed bugs bite!" She giggled, closing her eyes.

ROSALIE POV

Emmett and I walked quietly through the halls of the now darkened hospital hand in hand. Though visiting hours were now over, we had special permission from Carlisle to get Bella from Edward's room. I didn't expect her to come quietly, and leave a sick Edward alone, but she would have to, you couldn't sleep here if you weren't a patient. We passed room after room, and finally turned into the one with the correct number on it. The lamp on the bedside table was on, casting a dim glow across the room. Edward looked weak, and paler than before, wrapped in blanket after blanket. Bella was curled against him, cuddled into his side. They really did fit perfectly like that, each of their curves matching up, I couldn't remember a time when they hadn't lay like this, even when we were small. We looked at them for a while, not wanting to disturb them, their breathing was even and steady. Emmett sighed, and tip toed over to pick Bella up. He pryed her away from Edward gently, loosening her hold on him. She groaned.

"Edward.." She said sleepily.

"You can't sleep here Bells." Emmett said softly.

"Yes I can." She said dreamily. Emmett chuckled.

"No Bella, you can't." He said, smiling. Edward stirred.

"Far away places Bells." His voice came quietly from the bed.

"Right." She said, smiling and falling back asleep in Emmett's arms. Edward grinned and konked out once more. I giggled, as Emmett made his way back towards me, carrying Bella. We took her out to the car, and drove her home, not talking the whole time. I smiled at Emmett as he pulled up in front of their house, and kissed my cheek.

"Night Rosie." he said, smiling.

"Goodnight Em." I said, hugging him. He got out and opened the back door, hauling Bella back into his arms, his muscles bulging. He waved as I pulled away from the curb, and I saw him bring her up the front steps and inside the house.

EMMETT POV

I picked her up from Edward's arms, and held her against me. I had been worried about her, my little sister. I didn't like it when she was sad or in pain. She was still light as a feather, and when we arrived home, I carried her easily inside, and tucked her into bed silently. I watched her curl her knees up to her chest, and screw up her face in sleep. I knew she had wanted to stay with Edward, but I couldn't leave her there overnight. I wondered when her and Edward would stop being best friends, and become something more, we all knew it would happen at some point, but so far they had stuck it out almost all through high school, and were showing no signs of anything romantic. I really wouldn't mind if they did become something else, Edward was the one guy I knew I could trust with my baby sister, he would take care of her.

BELLA POV

I woke up and stretched my arms above my head lazily. My bed was cold and my feet were frozen, I shivered. It was monday, but I had no intention of going to school, I was going to spend the day with Edward again. I got up and shuffled over to my window. The snow from December was still resting on the ground, all icy and slick, making everything sparkle. I sighed, as a memory came to my mind.

Edward and I were 7 years old, walking home from school. It was a short walk from the elementary school to my house, and Edward's mom would pick him up later. It was snowing, thick flakes falling peacefully from the white sky. The white ground was lifting my spirits, I had been depressed lately, since my mom had left.

"Edward, snow is so pretty." I said, twirling and catching a flake on my tongue.

"I love snow." He agreed, chuckling, his bronze tousles speckled with white.

"Let's make a snowman when we get home!" I said excitedly.

"Okay!" He agreed, stomping happily in his gum boots and causing snow to splash upwards from the ground. We continued walking, stopping only to eat mouthfuls of cold snow. Just then, a black mercedes rolled up beside us on the street, coasting slowly. I got scared, my sixth sense kicking in, and grabbed Edward's arm.

"Edward...let's hurry." I said, pulling him along. The car rolled down it's front window, and a toothy man grinned at us.

"Hey kids, I lost my dog! He's fluffy and white and I can't find him in this snow. Can you help me?" He said with a Boston accent. I shook my head no.

"Sorry mister, we have to go home." I said, pulling Edward away from the car.

"You lost your dog?!" Edward said, incredulously. The man nodded. "Bella we have to help him!"

"No we don't!" I said frantically.

"Come on little girl, come help me. Your so pretty...my doggy would like you." He said, raising his eyebrows. I shook my head no again. "Come on sweetheart." The man taunted. This shook Edward out of his trance, and he went into protective mode, sensing something wrong.

"Hey! Leave her alone, she said she didn't want to go." He shouted.

"Hey, hey, hey! Let's not get upset." The man said.

"No one can bully Bella." Edward said.

"Is that so? Why?" The man said, chewing his lip.

"Because...because she has an older brother, and, and he will come beat you up!" Edward said, stuttering.

"That's right." I agreed. The man chuckled, shaking his head.

"Fine kids, I'll go find someone else to help me." He said, rolling up his window, and pulling away from the curb. I sighed in relief.

"Edward, he was scary." I said, shaking.

"I didn't like him, he tried to take you with him." Edward said, also shivering.

"I bet he was lying about losing his dog." I said, frowning. The two of us got home, and told Charlie what had happened. He wasn't on duty, so he called the station and told them to search the area for a black mercedes. We played outside, with Charlie watching us attentively from the porch, making snow angel after snow angel...

I shook my head, shaking the memory off. I pulled on one of Emmett's sweaters that was laying on the floor of my room, and headed down the stairs. Emmett was seated at the table.

"Nice sweater, Bells." He said. I smiled at him, pouring myself some orange juice. "Staying home today?" Emmett asked.

"Visiting Edward." I said, burrowing deeper into the sweater.

"Did dad say you could?" He asked, tattletale mode kicking in.

"Yes, yes." I said, rolling my eyes. He grinned, getting up and ruffling my hair.

"I gotta go, see ya Bells." He said, flinging his bag over his shoulder.

"Bye Em." I said, smiling. He left, and I hear him pulling his car out of the driveway, and out onto the street. Charlie had already left for the day, so I was alone. I went upstairs and got dressed, leaving Emmett's sweater on and pulling on some jeans. I left my hair down in curls, and pinned a section of it back with a clip. I took the stairs two by two, and grabbed the Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets from underneath the TV, and stuffed it in my bag to bring to Edward, it was his favorite one out of all the movies. I also grabbed a bag of Sour Cream and Onion chips from the cupboard, also his favorite. Carlisle had brought my truck back last night, and it was outside in the cold, waiting. I walked out to it, locking the door behind me. I jumped in, breathed into my hands trying to warm them, and started the engine, putting my bag in the passengers seat beside me. A couple minutes later I was pulling up in front of the hospital, the parking lot was almost empty. I got out and shivered in the stale cold, walking quickly towards the front doors. The warm air was a relief as I got inside, and I sighed, walking in the direction of Edwards room. I peeked inside, and he was sleeping, his bronze hair in his eyes and his biceps over the covers. I decided to leave him alone for a while, and walk around the hospital hallways. I strolled lazily around, almost nobody was awake yet, and the place was quiet. Every now and then, someone would walk past me with purpose. Just then, an old man in a hospital robe crossed my path. He smelt of stale alchohol, and another memory caught me offguard.

Edward and I were 15. It was dark and cool outside, and we stood on the balcony of Mike Newton's house. He was having a party for his 15th birthday, and the house was packed. I could feel the beat of music vibrating the floor, and the dim lights inside cast an inviting glow. Edward loved parties, he loved dancing and drinking, and living life to the fullest. It didn't help that he was popular and gorgeous. Mike's parents weren't home, and so almost everyone was drinking, including Edward. He held the red plastic cup in his hands as he leant against the balcony, his elbows on the railing. He wasn't too drunk yet, and still capable of conversation.

"Bells?" He said, grinning.

"Yeah?" I asked, adjusting my dress. It was black, and came up a little too short, Alice's creation.

"Why don't you drink?" He asked. I looked at him, and rolled my eyes.

"You smell." I told him, ignoring the question. He looked confused.

"Whaaat?! I do not Bellie." He said, and I groaned. "Please have fun with me Bella? I'll keep you safe, promise." He said. I looked down. I had secretly always wanted to drink, but had been to scared.

"Can I sleep over so my Dad won't find out?" I asked him. He nodded.

"Wouldn't have it any other way." He said, smiling. I smiled back.

"What's that?" I asked, pointing to his cup.

"Just Smirgnoff and raspberry liquer I think." He said, peering into it. He offered it to me. I took a deep breath, and took a sip...

An hour and a half later, I had had too much than I should have, and was literally leaning on Edward. He had stopped drinking in order to help me.

"Edwaaard!!!" I said, giggling.

"Yeah Bells?" He asked me softly.

"Can I meet Orlando Bloom? Is he..is he here?" I asked innocently.

"Nah he couldn't make it." Edward said, grinning.

"What about that guy...Peter Faccineli! Who looks like your DAD?!" I said, tripping and falling onto my hands and knees.

"Nope he isn't here either." Edward said, helping me up. People laughed.

"Hey Bella!" Tyler called from a couch. I stumbled over, and sat on his lap. He grinned. I kissed him sloppily, not knowing what I was doing. Edward stared, shrugged, and walked away. 20 minutes later, I was starting to feel sick. I made my way through the crowds, trying to find Edward. I found him, chatting up some girl from a different school, and sighed happily. She had blonde hair cascading down her back, and was wearing short shorts. I ignored her, and fell onto Edward.

"Edward. I feel sick." I said, steadying myself on his forearm.

"Okay Bells, ready to go home?" He said, grabbing me so that I wouldn't fall over. I nodded.

"I'm sleeping at your house tonight." I yawned, and he nodded, knowing.

"Cmon Bells." He said.

"Who's this?" The blonde girl asked.

"This is Bella." He said, hoisting me up as I began to slip again. "She's my other half."

"Edward..." I whispered, pulling his earlobe, interupting his conversation with the blonde. "I kissed Tyler." I told him.

"I saw." He said, smiling.

"Do you wanna kiss blondie? I know you do!" I whispered loudly again, and giggled. She ignored me.

"So you guys are friends?" She asked us.

"Best Friends since birth." He told her, and she nodded.

"Sorry, but I really gotta go." He told her, wrapping his arm around me as I began to try to sit on the floor. He slipped her his number, and then led me towards the door. As soon as we got outside, I threw up in the garden. Edward rubbed my back, murmuring things.

"Im so sorry Bella. I was drunk when I asked you to drink." he said, shaking his head. "This is all my fault."

"I had funnnnn." I said, gripping him. He walked me home to his house, where we snuck upstairs, and I fell asleep immediately. 


	8. Author's Note 2

Hey Guys! I just need to say something! I get alot of my inspiration from other fan fictions on this site, and I appreciate all you guys who write them, because I LOVE reading them! Also, I get MOST of my inspiration from songs...Here's some, if you want to listen to them, they're all great :)

Jump Then Fall-Taylor Swift The Best Day-Taylor Swift Mary's Song (Oh My My My)-Taylor Swift Hey Stephen-Taylor Swift Remember To Breathe-Dashboard Confessionals 1979-Smashing Pumpkins You Found Me-The Fray Touch My Hand-David Archuletta

UPDATE COMING VERY SOON! 3 


	9. Chapter 7 Carlos

**HEY GUYS!! Thank you for waiting SO LONG **

**xoxox**

EDWARD POV

I opened my eyes, and there she was, sitting lazily in the chair beside my bed, her feet propped up on one of the arms, reading Wuthering Heights as usual. She was biting her lip, obviously at an exciting part in the story. I waited for her eyes to finish scanning the page. She sighed, putting the book down.

"Edward! You're awake!" She said, looking up in my direction. She got out of her chair, and hugged me around the waist as I began to sit up. I wrapped my arms around her and squeezed. "Can't breathe!" She wheezed, and I let her go, chuckling.

"Good Morning sunshine!" I said, sneezing.

"Bless you." She said simply, smiling.

"Ugh...thanks. They gave me this medecin last night and the taste is still in my mouth." I said, making a face. She poured me a glass of water from the pitcher on the table, and I drank it gratefully, finishing it quickly.

"How are you feeling?" She asked, sitting cross legged on the end of my bed.

"Much better than yesterday, they said they might be able to let me out this evening." I told her, grinning.

"That's great!" She exclaimed, as the nurse came in. I was surprised to see that it was a guy, his dark brown, almost black curls falling into his eyes. He looked sort of latino, but not completely. I noticed Bella perk up immediately, and smiled.

"Hello, I'm Carlos. I'm a student nurse." He said amicably.

"Hey." I said politely. He looked at Bella, and smiled. She blushed faintly.

"How have you been feeling this morning ?" Carlos asked, pulling at his uncomfortable looking scrubs.

"Great." I said, making an effort to sound healthy, I really didn't want to be in here for another night.

"That's awesome, I'm going to get someone in here to take a blood test, and then I'll be back with the results later." He said.

"Thank you!" I said appreciatively.

"Who's this?" He asked, motioning towards Bella. I grinned, urging her silently to introduce herself, because I wasn't going to do it for her.

"I'm Bella." She said quietly, looking at him.

"Bella." He said with perfect Spanish sounding articulation, making the name even prettier. He shook her hand, and left the room. As soon as he was out of ear shot, she squealed.

"Edward! Did you see that!?" She said, bouncing into me. I hugged her.

"Yeah Bells." I said, smiling.

"He actually asked me, instead of the other way around!" She said excitedly, her beautiful face lit up. I shook my head, chuckling. Bella didn't see the way most men looked at her at school and when we were out. She was absolutely, positively head turning. All my friends who didn't know her very well loved to chat about how pretty she was, and when we were somewhere where we didn't know anyone, she tended to attract many stares from the opposite sex. The trouble was she didn't know it, and felt small and invisible. I was happy for her, that she seemed to like this Carlos person, and he seemed like a nice guy, but somewhere deep inside, I hated him.

BELLA POV

He was nice to look at. I admired his broad shoulders and tanned skin as he talked to Edward, and watched his full lips move smoothly. His dark, curly hair fell in ringlets into his eyes, and his smile was perfectly white. I hadn't had a crush on anyone since ninth grade, when the quiet boy in my french class smiled at me. I had hung on to his every word, however few, for weeks with the help of Alice or Rosalie. I had figured out three things by the time I stopped liking him. His name was Peter, he liked baseball, and he had a girlfriend at a different school. Although that had been so long ago, I was pretty sure this was how it felt.

"To hell with James Benna." I muttered under my breath, curled against Edward. He chuckled.

"Although I couldn't agree more, I can't help but ask why you would say that now." He said. I cursed. I had spoken before I had thought, and now had to tell Edward about James liking me.

"Well he was going to ask me out...according to Rosalie." I said, waiting for his reaction. His fists clenched and unclenched, and he growled.

"You can't be serious." He said angrily. I sat up in his arms and faced him. He was scowling, and looked ready to kill. "Bella you can't." He said, looking lost.

"Edward don't worry. Did you hear what I said? I said to hell with him." I told him, smoothing his furrowed eyebrows. He calmed down slightly, taking deep breaths.

"Right."

"I've decided Carlos is much better looking." I said happily. Edward chuckled half heartedly, and smiled.

"James needed a good beating anyways, and my fists are getting rusty." He said, smacking one into his other palm.

"I doesn't have to resort to violence." I told him, smiling.

"Oh trust me, with James it does. Sure, you've spoken to him a couple times, but you don't really know him. He treats girls like shit, and I've told him before not to mess with you." He said, pulling one of my curls.

"Well I wasn't going to say yes." I assured him, and he smacked his fist into his palm again.

"Still..." He muttered.

"I brought Harry Potter, wanna watch?" I asked him.

"Chamber Of Secrets?" He asked me, and I nodded. "You know me too well, Bells." He said. I popped the DVD into the TV on the wall, and pressed play. I settled into his arms and the movie started.

We finished the movie, and Edward sighed. I sat up looking at him.

"You know," I said, "I don't think I've ever seen you so sick."

"I don't feel that weird, it's just my lungs that hurt." He said. I cocked my head to the side.

"Hopefully you can get out of here today..." I said.

"I think I will, and they said I can go back to school also." He said. I smiled

"Good." I said, settling back into his arms. There was a silence.

"Hey Beautiful?" He said, poking my side.

"Yeah?" I answered him.

"Could you go get us some food from the cafeteria? I would come but I'm not supposed to take the I.V out today." He asked, his green eyes bright.

"Sure." I said, ruffling his hair. He smiled.

"Thanks Bella Smella." He said, and I frowned. He grinned again, and I did too, his smile being contagious. I hopped out of the bed, and made my way out of the room, walking casually down the hallway when I noticed that Alice was walking in my direction. She squealed.

"Bella!" I didn't know you were here!" She said.

"Where else would I be?" I said, smiling.

"Good point." She said, nodding. "Where are you going?"

"Cafeteria, Edward's hungry." I said.

"Of course." She said rolling her eyes. "I'll come with you." We linked arms. We walked slowly down the halls, taking in the busy bustling sights of the hospital. And then I saw him, Carlos, talking to another nurse by an ope door. I stopped in my tracks.

"Alice, do you remember when I liked Peter in grade 9?" I said, staring.

"Yeah, why?" She asked.

"That feeling just hit me again." I said, and she followed my gaze.

"Wow. He is gorgeous. Where did you meet this one?"

"He's Edward's student nurse. His name is Carlos..." I said, admiring his bright smile as he laughed at something the other nurse said.

"Go talk to him." Alice begged me.

"No way!" I said, I had never been the best at flirting.

"Just go ask him where the cafeteria is, ask him if he can show you. I'll stay back." She said, and I gulped. She gave me an encouraging look. I smiled, and walked towards him, sure that my cheeks were already a light pink.

"Hi Carlos." I said awkwardly, as I reached him. He turned around and looked bewildered for a moment.

"Oh, hey Bella. Is there something wrong with Edward?" He asked, and I shook my head.

"I was just wondering where the cafeteria is, do you know?" I said, blushing. He smiled.

"Yeah, come on, this way." He said, walking in the direction I already knew led to the cafeteria. I followed quickly, falling into step beside him. "So...is Edward your boyfriend then?" He asked, and I rolled my eyes at the familiar question.

"Edward? No no. He's my other half." I said, describing him in the only way I could. Carlos looked confused. I sighed. "My best friend since birth." I said, and he nodded.

"So you guys are close?" He asked. I chuckled.

"Close enough that you don't know how many times people have asked me that first question." I said, and he smiled. "It gets annoying after a while."

"Oh, I'm sorry." He said.

"No, I didn't mean-" I began, but he smiled.

"It's okay." He said, looking at me. We had arrived at the cafeteria by this time, and I smiled.

"Thanks." I said, and he nodded, sticking his hands in his pockets. I turned away from him, and smiled to myself, wishing I could dance on the spot. I began to walk to the counter to order, when I heard him call me.

"Bella!" Carlos called, and I twirled back around. He looked nervous.

"Yeah?" I said, biting my lip.

"I was...I was thinking we should go for a coffee sometime." He said, and I felt like my head would explode from surprise. It took me a couple seconds to answer.

"I'd love too." I said sincerely. He grinned, relieved.

"Great!" He said, swinging back on his heels. We exchanged numbers, and he hurried off, smiling one last time. I almost did do a little dance right on the spot.

EDWARD POV

She rushed back into my room, her arms carrying a tray full of french fries and flat cafeteria hamburgers. Her cheeks were glowing pink, and she smiled widely.

"What's gotten into you?" I asked, grinning as well. When she was happy, I was too.

"Carlos." She sighed, and I chuckled.

"Yes, dreamy isn't he?" I imitated a girl's high pitched voice. She smiled, slapping my shoulder playfully.

"He wants to go for coffee." She said, putting the warm tray on my lap, and settling back into her spot. She munched on a french fry.

"That's great!" I said, squeezing her shoulders.

"Yeah..." She said dreamily. Just then, Alice pranced in.

"Hey Bella! How'd it go?!" She said excitedly.

"He asked me for coffee." She said, her pretty smile lighting up her face again.

"That's awesome!" My sister said, jumping up and down on the spot. I rolled my eyes.

"I think I need to hang out with men more." I said. Bella looked offended, and sat up.

"You do. You sit around with my oaf of a brother when your not doing cool stuff with me." She said. "And Jazz."

"Ya well..." I said, and she pouted. "I'm kidding Bells! You know I have much more fun with you."

"Do I?" She said playfully. "How should I know?"

"Because...I've known you since you were pooping in diapers, and you really should trust me." I said, and she screwed up her face.

"Alright fine." She said, smiling and settling back into my arms. She really was the only one who fit there like that. No other girl I had ever been with fit in the same spot like Bella did. I always felt uncomfortable, like they were the wrong pieces of a puzzle. For the rest of the day, we sat around with Alice watching movies and munching on chips, until Carlos finally came in with the doctor to release me...hopefully. I watched Bella's features align themselves into a smile as he walked in.

"Hi." She said quietly, biting her lip. He waved and smiled. As the doctor examined me, Carlos watched and learned. Bella had to sit up and get out of my embrace, so that I could be checked over.

"Well Mr. Cullen, I think it's safe for you to go home now." He said, smiling.

"Thank you!" I said gratefully. Bella squealed.

"Finally!" She said, tousling my hair. She waved as Carlos left, and bounced up and down. "Come on! Let's go!"

"Alright, alright." I said, grinning back at her. She helped me sit up, and passed me my jacket. I had changed into my own pajamas earlier in the day. She wrapped her arm around my waist and Alice did the same on the other side, and we all three marched out of the hospital in a victory march.

**Reviews? Thanks everyone!**


	10. Chapter 8 Damaged

Hey everyone, this has a couple bad words in it and teens drinking…for younger readers I'm just saying I warned you. I think imma change the rating on this thing hehe.

There's a link to the girl's outfits here : .com/cgi/app#foo

Two days later, I was up and active again, after a weekend of lazing around my house with my family and Bella, and I felt completely better. It was Monday morning, and I climbed into my Volvo, wrapped in scarves, to pick up Bella. I pulled up in front of her house and she hopped in, smiling and rubbing her hands together.

"Hey sicky." She greeted me. I grinned.

"Not anymore." I said, and she laughed.

"Ready for another day of torture?" She asked, smiling as we drove into the school parking lot.

"Ugh. I think I'd actually rather be sick." I said, chuckling. We climbed out of the car and hurried inside, out of the cold. People in the halls called out greetings, and I waved back cheerily. Bella rolled her eyes and smiled.

"Mr. Popular is back." She said as we reached her locker.

BELLA POV

Tyler bounced up to us, grinning at me. I smiled tentatively back, not wanting to give him to wrong impression.

"Hey Edward! Feeling better?" He asked. Edward chuckled.

"Yeah thanks." He said.

"Well I was thinking, Mike's parents are in Cuba for two weeks, and he's having his annual party this Saturday, you guys going?" Tyler asked.

"We'll be there." Edward assured him. I nodded, everyone always went to Mike's party. He had a big one every year, because his parents trusted him so much that they went away often.

"Cool, see you there then." Tyler said, jogging off. Edward and I walked to our History class, and took our respective seats. We had a substitute teacher, and Edward passed me a funny sketch he had done of the chubby woman with acne on a piece of lined paper. I laughed quietly, and rolled my eyes.

The rest of the week passed in a flurry of tests and quizzes I had missed when I had been at the hospital with Edward, and homework I hadn't done. I was exhausted the whole week, and eventually it was Saturday. I gladly slept in late, and groaned when I saw that it was already twelve. I didn't have work, because Mrs. Newton had closed the shop while she was on vacation, but I had to do some chores around the house before I went to Mike's. I shuffled down the stairs and heard a familiar voice.

"Nice hair." Edward said. I hadn't seen him for basically the whole week except for shortly at school, because of the amount of work I had to finish. I fell into his arms, and pretended to start snoring again. He chuckled.

"Why are you here?" I asked, straightening up. He shrugged.

"Watched a movie with Emmett earlier, and just came here after." He grinned. I hugged him around the waist.

"I feel like I haven't seen you forever." I said.

"I know." He said, agreeing. Just then Emmett came in, and grinned, shaking his head. Edward gave him a glare. I shrugged and went to make myself some breakfast before starting my chores.

"Are you guys going to Mike's?" Emmett asked, sitting down at the kitchen table.

"Yeah, you?" I answered, pouring myself some cereal. He nodded.

"Alice wants me to tell you she'll be over at 9 to help you get ready." Edward said, chuckling. I grumbled.

EDWARD POV

I left my house after freshening up a little at 11 to pick up Bella and Alice from her house. I lived for this, parties I meant. I loved them. I pulled up, and they climbed in quickly, trying to avoid the cold. Alice had dressed Bella in a fresh white spaghetti strap shirt, and a tight, black, high waisted skirt that hugged her curves perfectly. A necklace on a silver chain hung from her neck, and her hair was down and cascading over her shoulders in defined curls. She had a little makeup on. I had to hold back my gasp, and I silently cursed Alice for dressing her like that. As for Alice, she was wearing a red tank top and a leather jacket with skinny jeans. I choked back what I would have said to any other girl dressed like that, which would have caused Bella to look at me weirdly. She looked to good to be true.

"You look beautiful." I said, grinning. She blushed as usual.

"Thanks. Thank god for Alice." She said. Alice grinned and looked proud. I wished lightning would strike her, she had done this to me on purpose. I pulled out of the driveway and drove to Mike's. We all three climbed out and headed towards the door. Bella tripped on one of the walkway stones, and I caught her around the waist before she could hit the ground, giving me an excuse to enjoy the outfit. She giggled. The weird feeling in my stomach settled as my hands held her securely upright, I hated feeling this way about my best friend. But in a way it was interesting. I knew Alice could see it. We entered the house which was already filled with people, and I finally released Bella's waist. I saw Jessica glare at her. I rolled my eyes, and leaned down to whisper in her ear.

"Bitch attack. Jessica's here." I said. Bella chuckled.

"Whatever." She said, looking around.

"BELLA!" Mike called, greeting her. He was already buzzed.

"Hey Mike..." She said. He handed her a cup full of vodka and juice, and she took a sip. I grabbed a beer from the table beside me, and followed Bella as she tugged me through the crowd. We reached a place where everyone was dancing, and Bella shrunk back into me. I chuckled, wrapping my arm around her, hoping she wouldn't mind. She looked up at me, but didn't stop me. A boy from another school was eyeing her, and as much as I hated to do it, I released my arm from around her, letting him know she wasn't mine, although I felt like she was. Alice pranced off to dance with Jasper, and the boy, who had dark hair and pale eyes, asked Bella to come dance with him. She looked up at me excitedly. I gave her an encouraging grin that vanished the second she turned around. She followed the boy and released my hand. I wandered through the crowds, finishing my beer quickly and grabbing another. I grinned back at all the girls I didn't know who gave me the eye, but made no move to talk to them. I spotted Rosalie leaning up against the wall, and went over to stand beside her.

"Hey." She greeted me. I smiled a small smile. "Bella look's great, doesn't she?" She said. I ran a hand through my hair, yanking it, and glaring at her. I rolled my eyes and made my way out to the large wooden deck in the back of Mike's house. It was cold, but almost deserted. I felt a hand on my shoulder, and turned, it was Rose again. "Hey, look, I'm sorry." She apologized.

"It's okay." I said, looking up at the black sky. We were silent for a while.

"It's killing you. I know." She said finally. I nodded.

"You're the only one who knows." I told her. She nodded.

"She'll see it eventually." She said. I shook my head.

"I'm going for a drive." I told her.

"Don't catch pneumonia again. If you're not back in two hours, I'm calling you." She said, and I nodded. I went around to the front and slammed my car door as I got in. I drove all the way to La Push, and walked along the dark, deserted beach until I found a log suitable for sitting. I put my head in my hands, and kicked the sand around with my feet, I shivered. The time passed quickly, and an hour and a half later, after finishing another beer I had brought, I started to head back to the party, my head somewhat cleared. Or so I thought.

BELLA POV

"James I really-" I started, tripping. James Benna caught me.

"Come on." He said, caressing my waist. I was considerably drunk, and I had no idea where I was. It was quiet.

"I don't want to." I told him. I didn't like the feel of his hands on me. He kissed my shoulder. I couldn't. All I could think about was Edward's fury in the hospital when I told him about James.

"Bella...please?" He pleaded in a seductive voice. My vision was blurry, but I managed to push his face away from mine. "Are you afraid Eddie-kins will find us?"

"No." I slurred, angry. "I don't want too Tyler."

"It's James." He said.

"Right. Sorry." I apologized. I had known that.

"Fine, at least take a drive with me." He said. In my drunk state, I consented, happy that he wasn't touching me anymore.

ROSALIE POV

Bella was drunk as shit. I had never seen her this wrecked. Well maybe once last year. But she always had Edward at her side to protect her. Where was he? He had been gone for almost three hours, and wasn't answering my calls.

"Bells! Get yourself together." I said as she accidentally smashed into a wall. She laughed, her eyes not seeing me.

A while later, I saw her go into a room with James Benna. Damn. What if Edward came back now? What would he do. 10 minutes later, I watched him lead her out the door by the hand, but I resisted the urge to stop her. She tripped. I bit my lip, but then turned away to find Emmett.

A while later, Edward burst through the door again. Jessica draped herself over his strong chest, but he pushed her off. I could tell he had also had to much to drink, but Edward wasn't like Bella, he could hold his liquor. He made his way over to me, and sure enough, he smelled strongly of beer and ocean.

"Where's Beautiful?" He asked. I crossed my arms.

"I don't know." I said. "Go look for her." He grabbed another beer and chugged half of it. He looked around aimlessly, and then walked away in the opposite direction. I saw him entrance a pretty red head with those eyes of his, and watched as she followed him into the guest room. I rolled my eyes. An hour later, I jumped as he burst through the door without the girl, his hair a mess and his lips swollen, and stumbled as fast as he could to his car. I ran after him.

"Edward no! What the hell do you think you're doing? You're trashed!" I yelled.

"Bella." He said as he pulled recklessly out of the driveway. I ran back inside.

BELLA POV

"James where are we going?" I slurred, falling over into his side. We had driven for a while it seemed like to me, and then gotten out of the car. I was cold. It smelt like forest. He pulled me along by the waist. I giggled as I tripped.

"Guess." He said.

"Arizona?" I asked. We walked a for a while. Up hill.

"Nope." He said.

"Atlantis?" I guessed again.

"That isn't a real place Bella." He said. I laughed hysterically. We stopped. It smelt like trees. James pulled me to him. I was uncomfortable. He pressed his lips to mine, and I protested.

"Don't!" I said.

"Why not?" He asked slickly. I fidgeted uncomfortably underneath his restricting arms.

"Because." I said, my drunk mind unable to find words to explain why I didn't want this. He chuckled darkly. He kissed me roughly again, and I was dizzy. Not from his kiss, but from lack of air. I breathed heavily as he let me go for a minute before pinning me down on the floor that smelt like pine.

"James, please." I said.

"Edward won't find us here." He said, kissing me again. I felt myself go limp. His hands travelled up my shirt. They were cold. I was cold. I shivered. He kissed me again, and I felt like vomiting. No, I wasn't going to give up. I kneed him in the groin hard, and he gasped. "Bitch!" He uttered. He rolled off me, but I stayed put, to cold and drunk to move. He spit onto the ground.

"Don't touch me." I said with effort.

"Fine. Bye Bella." He said bitterly, getting up. I felt relieved, and I heard his footsteps walk away. But then I realized I was alone, in what I thought was a forest. At night. I got up from the ground with tremendous effort, and stumbled around. I called James' name. I called Edward's name. I called Emmett's name. No answer. Nothing. I started to cry. Branches slapped against my face as I wandered around. I slammed into something hard and woody smelling, and a sharp ripping pain tore through my face. I finally fell to the ground, and bumped my head on a rock. I could feel myself losing conciousness, so I pulled out my phone and pressed number three as hard as I could, Edward's speed dial.

"Hello?" His heavy breathing voice answered. I could hear a girl's voice in the background.

"Edward. Help me. James." I said weakly.

"I'm coming, Beautiful." I heard him say before the world went completely black.

EDWARD POV

"Hello?" I answered, seeing Bella's name on speed dial. I pushed the girl, who's name was Sandra off me. She groaned.

"Edward. Help me. James." I heard Bella slur. There was no noise in the background. I automatically stood up, a sick feeling in my stomach. A rush of anger surged through me.

"I'm coming, Beautiful." I said, bursting out of the room. I hurried to my car, not caring how drunk I was. I saw Rose running down towards me.

"Edward no! What the hell do you think you're doing? You're trashed!" She yelled. I didn't care.

"Bella." I said, unable to explain. I think I knew where she was. There was a place up by the outskirts of the town in the forest, a campground to be specific, where James and other guys liked to drink. They also liked to take girls there. I drove over the speed limit to where it was. I jumped out of the car, and searched the gravel path of the parking lot. No Bella. I ignored the sign that said no trespassers after 11:00pm, and headed into the campground. It was dark, very dark. There were no tents or families, since it was still winter. I searched all the sites, and the surrounding forest. He had really taken her in far. The thought pushed me to hike up the leisure trail, calling her name. It was ghostly quiet. But then I saw a flash of white of the path. I rushed towards it, and found her, laying on her side on a downwards slope. I turned her over onto her back, and gasped. She had a gash across her whole right cheek, beginning at the corner of her eye and finishing just before her jaw. The blood was drying now, and I wondered how long she had been laying here. Her shirt was halfway hiked up, so that her stomach was exposed. I pulled it back down. There was branches and bits of moss stuck in her hair and her mascara was running. I picked her up carried her out of the forest, back onto the path. I cradled her limp body like a baby, and carried her back to the campsite where I sat down on a picnic table with her still on my lap. I stroked her knotted hair.

"Bella. Beautiful Bella." I crooned. Anger heated my whole body at the thought of James. I shook her gently. Her big brown eyes flickered open, and she began to cry again. "Shhh." I soothed her.

"Edward." She slurred weakly, cowering into me.

"I'm here." I told her. "I'm not going to leave." Her hands gripped my forearms. She was so cold. I picked her up again, and carried her to my warm car. I sat her down in the backseat where her head lolled onto the headrest. She closed her eyes again.

"No Bells, you have to stay awake." I said, shaking her leg.

"Edward." She said again. I stroked her hair and left her for a minute to grab the first aid kit my father left in my trunk. I sat with her in the back, and turned on the heat in the Volvo. I pulled one of my hoodies over her head, and she shivered. I picked all the branches and moss out of her hair, and dabbed disenfectant on all the tiny cuts on her face, hands and legs. As for the gash, I would have to let Carlisle deal with that one. I didn't want to touch it and make it worse. It looked like it needed stitches.

"Beautiful, don't touch your face, alright?" I said. She nodded. I knew how to deal with Bella when she was this drunk. I was still feeling the buzz myself. I did up her seat belt and told her to stay awake. She nodded again. I drove as carefully as I could this time. "Bella, I need you to tell me who did this to you." I said.

"James took me to the forest. It wasn't Atlantis." She said. I didn't ask about the Atlantis part, but I knew all I needed to know. Bella wouldn't be the only one leaving with a messed up face tonight. I pulled up in front of Mike's again, and picked Bella up after she stumbled trying to walk. She clung onto me like a toddler. I burst through the door and people gasped.

"Bella!" People shouted. Everyone was screaming. I noticed that she did look pretty scary. I probably didn't look so great myself. She shook and shivered. I rubbed her back and ignored the people questioning me.

"It's loud." She said quietly, her head resting on my shoulder. I searched the crowd for Emmett. She closed her eyes.

"Stay awake Bells." I told her once more. She began to cry again, and shake. I rubbed her back some more, and finally spotted Emmett. People were panicking now, trying to figure out what happened. I rushed towards Emmett, who was leaning against the wall with Jasper, Alice and Rosalie.

"BELLA!" Emmett shouted as I reached them. "WHAT HAPPENED?" He yelled at me.

"James Benna. Left her in the campground. Far up the trail. Probably for an hour." I seethed. Emmett made fists with his hands. I handed her to him, and he rocked her side to side.

"Edward." Her weak voice came again.

"I'll be right back, beautiful." I promised.

"Ed! I want to pummel him too." Emmett said through his teeth.

"Emmett, let him take this one, it's James." Alice said. Emmett nodded. I gave Bella one last look, she was huddled up against Emmett, who had sat down in a chair. I searched the walls for James. I saw him, looking panicked, heading outside to the deck. I followed him determinedly, my fists clenching and un-clenching. I went outside, and saw him. He turned towards me, and grinned. I closed the door behind us.

"Edward..." He said in a slick voice.

"What did you do to her?" I growled in a low voice, trying not to shout.

"So you found her?" He asked calmly. I nodded.

"Why did you leave her?" I said angrily. He shrugged. "I've known you to do some pretty low things, Benna, but never this. A couple more hours and she could have died, you know that?" I seethed.

"You're exagerrating." He said. I shook my head.

"Have you seen her, James? Does that not make you sorry?" I asked angrily. He shrugged. "Her Dad's chief of police." His mouth formed a comical 'o'. He had forgotten, he looked nervous. I stepped closer to him. "Run, and you're dead." I threatened. He stayed put. I grabbed his collar and threw a punch that hit him square on the jaw. He uttered a groan, but threw one of his own. It hit me in the mouth. That only made me angrier. He would pay for what he did to my Bella. I punched him hard in the stomach, and he doubled over. I hit him there again, and he fell over. I knelt down and punched his jaw again. His eyes closed. I stood up, breathing hard, and kicked him in the side. He uttered another groan, and blacked out. I grabbed a beer that was sitting on the table next to me and poured it over his clothes.

"Jackass." I said, knowing he couldn't hear me. I kicked him once more for good measure, and headed back inside. It was reasonably quieter, most people huddled around Bella and Emmett. Alice was dabbing her forehead with a cool cloth, and they had wiped up the blood and makeup. She looked up at me as I approached them.

"Edward, you're bleeding." She said drowsily. I nodded, taking in her pitiful presence. "Em." She said simply, and Emmett released her. I gave him a grateful look, and let Bella fall into my arms, where she cowered. She touched my swollen lip gently with her finger. "Ouch." She said, wiping the blood off my chin with the sleeve of my hoodie she was wearing. I checked the time. It was 4 in the morning, later than these parties usually went on.

"Let's go home." I said, and she nodded, letting me carry her out to the car.

"Bella, what did he do to you?" I asked angrily as we drove through the silent streets.

"Kissed me. A lot. I didn't want him too. He got angry." She said in short sentences.

"Is that all?" I asked.

"Called me a bitch and left." She said. I reached back and squeezed her hand tightly. She returned the pressure.

I pulled up in Charlie's driveway. Bella clutched me as I carried her to the front door.

"Gonna be in trouble." She murmured. I was almost absolutely sure Charlie wouldn't care that she had been drinking after he saw the state she was in. Emmett's car pulled up close behind mine, and he jogged up to where we were. He knocked clearly on the door. It took a while, but Charlie eventually opened the door, dressed in his slippers and robe.

"Okay Dad...so we need you to listen before you freak out." Emmett said calmly. Bella was hiding her face in my chest. "We went to a party. We were drinking. Bella had a little too much and went for a car ride with a guy who's a real dick." Emmett paused, Charlie was listening attentively. "He left her out in the campground, way up on the trail for about an hour, by herself." Charlie looked angry now. "Edward went looking for her and brought her back. He saved her. Then he took care of the dirt bag." Emmett finished. Bella looked up at her father, and when he saw her face, he staggered backwards.

"Bells!" He said in a worried voice. He ushered us in. "Is that all that happened, Em?" He asked. Emmett nodded. "Call Carlisle." He ordered. Emmett went towards the phone, and did as he was told. I followed Charlie into the living room and lay Bella down on the couch.

"I'm sorry Dad." She said, her words still a little jumbled. Charlie didn't say anything, he just stroked her hair.

"It's gonna be okay Bells." He said. Bella looked at me.

"Edward, what's wrong with my face?" She asked. "I can't feel it."

"Nothing, beautiful." I said in a pained voice. "Nothing's wrong. You have a cut."

"A big cut?" She asked. I nodded. "Where?" She whispered. I took her hand and guided it towards it. She touched it very gently and winced. Tears rolled down her face. She turned to her side, and vomited. It smelt like alcohol, and Charlie grimaced, going to get a cloth. Bella cried some more. I hummed her the lullaby I composed for her. She quieted and fell asleep, her hand still turning my fingers purple. "Edward I love you." She whispered. I looked down at her in shock, but she was deep in sleep. I ran a hand through my hair. Had she really just said that? She didn't mean it of course, she was drunk.

**Poor Edward **

**xoxox**


	11. Chapter 9 School

**Hey Guys! SO SORRY this update took so long! It was finished for a while, but I totally forgot to put it up! I've been working on my other stories lately, and it slipped my mind! Another update will be up shortly as I'm almost finished the next chapter Hope your summer is amazing.**

**Love xox**

BELLA POV

I woke up with a shooting pain in my face, I groaned.

"She's awake!" I heard someone whisper loudly. It sounded like Alice.

"Shhh!" Another voice said. Emmett this time.

"Someone get Edward." I heard Alice say. I opened my eyes. It was too bright. "Bella!" Alice said quietly. I tried to smile, but it hurt. That was confusing.

"Where am I?" I asked, not taking in my surroundings.

"Your house, sweetie." Alice told me. Another pain shot through my whole head.

"What the hell is wrong with my head?" I asked. I saw Edward come into the room, and tried to smile again, but it didn't work. He grinned in a relieved sort of way.

"Well...we're guessing you fell or hit a tree or something, but you have a huge gash on your cheek." Alice told me. I brought my hand up to my face, and sure enough felt a large gauze bandage. "And you also have a concussion from hitting your head on a rock, or so my Dad thinks so." She said. Edward sat down beside me on my bed. I sat up with great effort and rested the uninjured side of my face on his warm back.

"I'm tired." I said.

"That's surprising, since you've been asleep for nearly two days." Edward said.

"Seriously?" I asked, incredulous. He nodded.

"Do you remember what happened?" Emmett asked me. I searched my memory. Almost nothing came up.

"I remember a forest. And Edward. And James Benna. And something about Atlantis." I said, groaning. "How drunk was I?"

"Well, you were pretty wrecked. James took you to a forest and like tried to take advantage of you, but you kneed him in the groin so he left and called you a bitch. Then, you speed dialed Edward and he came to save you. Then Edward kicked the crap out of James." Alice chirped. "That's what we've figured out so far."

"Wow." I said. I hugged Edward from behind, just because he was there, and warm, and secure.

JASPER POV

I walked through the halls at school angrily. All people were talking about was Bella.

"Did you hear what happened to Bella Swan?" They said.

"Big gash across her face!" They murmured to each other.

"James Benna." They accused.

"Did you see Edward's face?" They asked each other. They asked me questions as well, but I didn't want to answer them. Yes, she was resting, yes she was okay, yes we were worried. James Benna was at school as well, and only his closest group of friends hung out with him anymore. Everyone liked Bella, and people who didn't like her, liked Edward, so naturally, everyone was livid with James. He was, for the first time in his spoiled little life, an outcast. Nobody said anything to him in the halls, people just stared, shook their heads, and glared. His face was bruised and pummeled by Edward, and his arm in a sling.

EDWARD POV

"Edward, I'm going to have a scar forever." Bella muttered as we watched a movie together in the living room, the day after she had woken up.

"It'll fade." I reassured her.

"I'll be ugly."

"Never." I told her. She tucked her face into my chest, and didn't say anything for a long time. The movie ended, and I carried Bella, now asleep, up to her bedroom. There were dark circles under her eyes from lack of sleep and the concussion, and the side of her face where the gash was was bruised and covered in a bandage. I kissed her forehead, and sighed.

THREE DAYS LATER

"I'm ready." She told me. She was dressed in her sweatpants and an old blue and yellow soccer jersey of mine with my name on the back.

"You still have that?" I asked, incredulously. She nodded.

"It's so comfy and silky." She said. She pulled her hair up into a messy bun, there were pieces of hair falling around her face.

"Are you sure you want to go?" I asked her. Bella was convinced she could go to school now. No one could change her mind. I didn't think it was a good idea, since she was still getting over the concussion, and was still supposed to be in bed, but Carlisle said if she didn't do gym, it should be fine.

"Yes, I'm sure." She said, taking a deep breath. I followed her out to my Volvo, which had been parked in her driveway for almost a week now. 10 minutes later, we were in the parking lot of the school. I looked at her, one side of her face still bandaged, and her hair messy. She was still my beautiful Bella, and I wasn't going to leave her side today, especially when James still had the nerve to show up at school. She took another deep breath, smiled a small, painful smile at me, and squeezed my hand. We climbed out of the car and walked closely side by side into the school. Everyone was quiet as we walked by, mostly because I gave anyone who stared murderous looks. But some people we knew well approached us to talk. Angela Weber, one of the only nice girls in this whole school, ran up looking worried.

"Bella!" She exclaimed. "How are you?"

"I'm fine thanks, Ange." Bella smiled slightly.

"I'm so glad to see you!" Angela said. She smiled tentatively up at me as well. Bella looked up too.

"Edward, stop scaring everyone. You look like you just stubbed your toe." She said. I couldn't help chuckle.

"Sorry." I said. Angela grinned.

ANGELA POV

I watched Bella and Edward walk into the school, and uttered a sigh of relief. Bella looked weak and tired, and the left side of her face was bandaged in gauze. She was dressed in comfortable clothes, and had Edward by her side of course. His gorgeous face looked like he could kill someone. No one dared approach him with that look on his face. But I knew Edward well enough to know that he was only trying to protect Bella from annoying students who would gape and ask stupid questions. I ran over to them.

"Bella!" I said. "How are you?"

"I'm fine thanks, Ange." Bella smiled slightly, looking pained.

"I'm so glad to see you!" I said, smiling. I looked up at Edward, and so did Bella.

"Edward, stop scaring everyone. You look like you just stubbed your toe." She said. I giggled.

"Sorry." He said, and I smiled. Edward really was a nice guy. Bella smiled again with effort, and I waved as I watched them walk away. Bella's shirt was one of Edward's old jersey's, with the word 'Cullen' printed across the back. I smiled. Everyone knew they made an amazing couple. Everyone except them.

BELLA POV

We walked through the halls, and I waved at people who smiled at me. People approached me all day, daring to challenge Edward's murderous stare. Mike kept apologizing profusely, telling me it was his fault, since it had been his party. He was getting kind of annoying. Jessica gave me this sort of strange, contemptuous sneer all day, I couldn't figure out what that meant. When I stumbled in the halls, Edward caught me around the waist before I could fall, which was often, as the concussion I had made me even more clumsy.

Lunch was an interesting event. We sat at our usual table with Alice, Jasper, Angela, Ben, Mike, Tyler, Eric, Edward and I. Rosalie and Emmett were off camping together. We were chatting lazily, me leaning into Edward's side and picking at my food, while I watched Angela try to get Ben to watch her siblings with her after school. Just then, James Benna walked into the cafeteria. I watched him pay for his food, and I saw Edward's eyes follow him as well. He was accompanied by Samuel Bryce, his best friend. I got a sick feeling in my stomach as I watched him make his way over to our table. Edward wrapped his arm tightly around my middle, and I leaned as far as I could into him. Mike stood up, and crossed his arms. James reached us. I looked at him, his features, that had always seemed so attractive before, were now bruised and cut. I guessed Edward had done that. I felt like vomiting as he opened his mouth to talk.

"What are you doing here?" Tyler defended me.

"Cool it. I'm here to apologize." He said slickly.

"Nice face." Edward spat at him. The whole cafeteria was now watching us. Even the ladies behind the food counter were silent. James glared. He looked at me, and his eyes darted down to Edward's arm placed protectively around me. He sneered.

"I'm sorry." He said in a slimy voice. I didn't say anything.

"Go away." Mike said.

EDWARD POV

"Why?" James asked, looking smug. I clenched my fists, and stood up, shoving Bella gently over into Jasper's side. I walked over to where James was standing, and dragged him by the collar of his shirt over to a corner of the cafeteria. He ripped himself out of my grasp, and started to talk.

"If you ever," I began, cutting him off. "Come near Bella again, I will personally make sure you stop breathing." I said, my voice low. He stopped talking, and looked at me apprehensively. "You understand?" I asked, my fists itching to collide with his skin. He nodded, a sour look on his face. I glared at him, and turned away, going back to our table, and sighing as Bella, soft and warm, leaned into my side. I pulled out my music sheets from my bag, and started making notes all over them in disgruntlement, trying to figure out the newest melody I had to put into my portfolio for the end of this semester. Bella peered at what I was doing. She leaned against my forearm, and chewed on her apple.

ANGELA POV

I watched Bella's face as Edward talked to James, she looked scared, and then relieved when he made his way back over, looking angry. He sat down without saying a word, and pulled out his sheets of music. He put his head in his hands, and started crossing things out and making notes everywhere. I smiled. Edward literally was a genius. The page was crowded with music notes and intense melodies. Bella looked over his shoulder, taking a bite out of her apple, and looked at what he was doing. She smiled at him, and leaned lazily against his arm.

BELLA POV

Finally, it was the end of the day, and Edward pulled me to the Volvo, sighing as we got inside. I frowned at him.

"What's wrong?" I asked. He shrugged.

"I just hate him. You have no idea how much I hate him." He said, breathing deeply. I rubbed his shoulder, and felt the tension in it release.

"Are you okay?" I asked. He nodded, smiling a small smile. I sat back, satisfied. We drove for a while, and I noticed he was headed towards his house. "Where are we going?"

"I need some advice." He said quietly. I nodded, knowingly. Edward was in a music mood. He was always like this, moody and quiet, always looking like he was concentrating on something. I hadn't seen him like this for a while, and was glad to know he was inspired again. He hardly ever showed anyone his music, or played it for anyone, even for me. But sometimes he would ask my opinion on something new, and it was always brilliant. We pulled into his driveway, and he opened my door for me, offering me his hand. I took it, and pulled myself out of the car, following him up to the porch. Esme smiled at me as we took our jackets off in the entrance hall, and headed upstairs, Edward watching me cautiously, making sure I didn't trip. I rolled my eyes. We reached his room, and he didn't say anything as I sat down on the comfortable bed. He searched his room for a good ten minutes, organizing papers, which I noticed were a little more abundant than usual. I smiled as he sighed, and picked up his guitar and portable piano keyboard, for musings on the go, and placed them on the bed.

"You have to give me honest advice." He said, with a straight face, " These are for my portfolio."

"Always do." I said. He smiled slightly. He played the Ghostbuster's theme quickly on the piano, loosening himself up. I laughed as he asked me 'who I was gonna call'. He finished with that, and peered at some more crumpled papers, the set them down again. He picked up his gleaming guitar and an old pick, and took a deep breath.

"Okay, ready?" He asked me. I nodded, settling myself against the pillows. He started to strum the opening chords of a calming, acoustic melody. It sounded a teeny bit sad, but not quite. He started to sing, and I closed my eyes, smiling and relaxing. Edward's voice was like honey and velvet, perfect and tortured, but at the same time unique and beautiful. It always made me want to close my eyes and soak it up.

_Well based on your smile_

_I'm betting all of this_

_Might be over soon_

_But your bound to win_

_Cause if I'm betting against you_

_I think I'd rather lose_

_But this is all that I have_

He sang beautifully, still strumming gently. I smiled at the line about betting, and he did too, closing his eyes as well.

_So please_

_Take what's left of this heart and use_ _Please use only what you really need_ _You know I only have so little_ _So please_ _Mend your broken heart and leave_

His voice hit the notes beautifully, holding them for different lengths and sending shivers down my spine. His voice was soft and smooth.

_I know it's not your style_ _I can tell by the way that you move_ _It's real, real soon_ _But I'm on your side_ _And I don't want to be your regret_ _I'd rather be your cocoon_ _But this is all that you have_ _So please_ _Let me take what's left of your heart and I will use_ _I swear I'll use only what I need_ _I know you only have so little _ _So please_ _Let me mend my broken heart and_ _You said this was all you had_ _And it's all I need_ _But blah blah blah_ _Because it fell apart and_ _I guess it's all you knew_ _And all I have_ _But now we have_ _Only confused hearts and_ _I guess all we have _ _Is really all we need_

I listened carefully, as I knew the song was coming to an end, and enjoyed the slow melody he was playing and singing, relishing in the pureness of his voice.

_So please_ _Let's take these broken hearts and use_ _Let's use only what we really need_ _You know we only have so little_ _So please_ _Take these broken hearts and leave _

I grinned as his voice sang the last words, and he finished with a slow, guitar melody, his fingers caressing the soft wood, looking down and concentrating. The room was silent, reverberating echoes of his music bouncing off the well amplified walls. He looked up at me, and his face looked so nervous.

"What did you think?" He asked quietly. I sat up, and stroked his face once.

"It was beautiful. I really, really loved it." I said. He smiled.

"Really?" He asked. I nodded. "I can tell you worked really hard." I said. "I can't tell you how nice that was. Your voice makes me want to sit in a hammock and swing, or cry, or so something for dying children in Africa." I told him. He chuckled, and sat back against the bed with me.

"Thank you." He said. I leaned against his shoulder and he stroked the smooth wood of his Guitar. After a while, I noticed a pulsing pain in my head.

"Edward, my head hurts." I said.

"I know, beautiful. Let's get you home." He said. Lifting me to my feet. I followed him out the door and down the stairs, and then into the cold interior of his car. He turned the heat on, and rubbed his hands together. "You alright?" He asked me. I nodded, and he began to drive in companionable silence. We reached my house in a matter of minutes, and he stopped the engine, waving at Charlie who had peered out of the window. I looked at him, he didn't have that familiar brightness in his eyes today, and his shoulders slumped. I touched his shoulder once more, and sighed.

"Are you sure you're okay?" I asked gently. He nodded.

"Sure." He murmured.

"You're making me worried." I told him, and he made an effort to smile at me.

"I'm fine." He said, and touched my bandaged face, placing a piece of hair behind my ear.

"Just try not to think about James, kay?"

"Okay." He agreed softly, smiling a small smile as I opened the door and got out of the car.

"Bye, I'll see you tomorrow?" I asked. He nodded.

"Bye, Bells." He said, my name rolling off his tongue felt so natural. I walked cautiously up to my front door, keeping my balance, and turned around, waving at Edward, he waved back and pulled out of the driveway, disappearing out of view down the street. I opened the door and walked in, giving my dad a sideways squeeze, and then heading up to my room. I pulled on some sweatpants, and fell down onto my bed, deciding to take a nap, since it was still only about 5:30, and I was exhausted.

An hour later, a shrill sound called me out of sleep. I groaned, and opened my eyes, they felt heavy. I picked up the phone that lay on my bedside table and answered groggily.

"Hello?"

"Hey...Is this Bella?" Asked a slightly familiar voice. I sat up.

"Umm, yeah. Who is this?" I asked, curious.

"It's Carlos. You know...from the hospital." He said awkwardly.

"Oh. Oh...hey!" I said, trying to make myself sound less tired.

"Hi." he said, sounding like he was smiling.

"What's up?" I asked him.

"Well I was wondering if you wanted to go for coffee with me tomorrow? Like after you get off school." He asked. I was thrilled of course, but then what would he say about my face? I touched it lightly, and sighed.

"I'd love too Carlos, but there's just this thing..." I started.

"What thing?" He asked.

"Well I kind of have a bandage on like one whole side of my face." I explained.

"Oh...well I don't mind. I mean, if you're feeling well enough. "Really?" I asked.

"Well ya. What happened?" He asked.

"It's a long story, can I explain tomorrow?" I said, chuckling.

"Of course." He said, chuckling as well.

**Review? Thank you!**


	12. Chapter 10 Date

**Hey! Hope you like this one!**

**:)**

EDWARD POV

I headed home and rushed upstairs once again. I couldn't believe this. Bella was my best friend. I wasn't supposed to like her this way. But the way she looked at me with those big brown eyes when I played her music, or when she asked if I was okay, paralyzed me. We both needed each other, but I wasn't supposed to need her this way. If I told her she would hate me. I loved her. I loved her insanely. I sighed and put my head in my hands, pulling my hair. I picked up my guitar again. I would miss her so much next year when I went to Juliard. It would be the longest we had been apart. I was scared. I strummed once on the strings, and pulled out sheets of paper, starting to write.

THE NEXT DAY

She hopped into the car with her usual bright smile. She was wearing jeans and a shell pink t-shirt and beige cardigan, a bag slung over her shoulder.

"Guess what?" She bubbled.

"What?" I asked her.

"Carlos called yesterday." She told me. Anger boiled in the pit of my stomach, but I tried to smile for her.

"That's great." I said.

"He asked me for coffee today."

"When?"

"After school. He's going to pick me up." She smiled. Damn. I had just been about to offer to drive her.

"Good for you, beautiful." I said. She looked at me.

"Did you sleep at all last night?" She asked. I chuckled halfheartedly. She always knew.

"No, I guess not." I said, as we reached the school. She looked at me sympathetically and kissed my temple.

"Edward. Please don't hurt yourself. I know your stressed about Juliard and all, but you need sleep." She said. I looked at her. I was falling apart slowly.

BELLA POV

I was worried about Edward lately. I leaned over as he looked at me with his green eyes and hugged him tightly. We got out of the car and hurried into the school. The day moved by slowly, as it always did when you we're excited about something. James wasn't at school today, to Edward's intense relief, and I wondered why. He would never miss a chance to flaunt himself. I dismissed it, and continued on with my day, avoiding stares by sticking to Edward's side. When the last bell rang, I felt butterflies in my stomach, Carlos would be waiting outside for me. I followed Edward to the parking lot, and waved at Carlos, his dark curly hair falling into his eyes. He was chatting with Mike and Tyler, surprisingly.

"Hey Bells, you're date is over there, you know." Edward teased as I followed him to his car.

"I know silly. I just wanted to ask you something." I said, and he smiled.

"Okay. What is it?" He questioned, putting his books on the roof of his car while he talked to me.

"Do I look nice? Do you think he'll care about my bandage?" I blurted out nervously, biting my lip. He grinned crookedly.

"You look beautiful as always, absolutely gorgeous." He said, and there was a moment of silence between us. I blushed. "And if he cares about the bandage, I'll be right there faster than you can say my name, and after I'm done with him, his face will look like James."

"Thanks." I whispered. I looked up at him. His eyes were dark and strange. It scared me to not be able to read them. I touched his shoulder. "Hey. Best Friends forever, right?" He looked up.

"And ever. Right. Have fun, Bells." He said, hugging me lightly. I returned it, and grinned one last time before turning around and heading back towards Carlos.

CARLOS POV

I pulled up in my Honda, and realized I was early. I turned off the engine, and hopped out, walking with my hands in my pockets to wait at the front door area. There were two boys who looked about a year younger than myself standing around, kicking pebbles and chatting. I regretted coming over here, now looking awkward standing beside them. They looked over, and a bubbly looking blond one cleared his throat.

"Can I help you with something?" He asked in a friendly sort of way.

"No, I'm waiting for someone." I said politely back. He looked interested. I took it he was a generally friendly guy. "Who? Our school's pretty small, I know everyone." He grinned broadly.

"Bella Swan?" I questioned, and he looked shocked.

"Bells?" He smiled.

"You know her?" I asked him.

"Very well. She's a good friend." He told me, sitting down beside me. He scuffed the gravel at his feet, looking up once again. "So why are you waiting for her?"

"Going for coffee." I answered, smiling.

"So like a date? You are going on a date with BELLA SWAN?" He questioned, laughing. I nodded.

"What's wrong with that?" I asked, offended. "She's pretty, and nice."

"Exactly. That's the problem. She never says yes to anyone." He told me, and I gulped.

"Really?" I asked. He nodded.

"Nobody." He grumbled. I had a feeling he had been turned down a few times. "Hey Tyler! This guy here is going on a DATE with Bella!" He called over to his friend. Tyler also looked surprised, and came over to us.

"Good job." He congratulated me.

"I'm Mike by the way." The blond boy stuck out his hand. I shook it.

"Carlos." I introduced myself. The bell rang, and I leapt up in anticipation.

"Just a warning though," Mike said. "Don't hurt her. In like any way."

"Of course not. But why would you say that?" I asked.

"Edward will kick your sorry ass." He answered simply. "You should see James Benna, the guy who messed up Bella's face. I'd say his face is even more screwed up than hers now that Edward is through with him."

"Seriously." Tyler agreed fervently. I watched Bella walk out of the school, with the tall, slightly muscular Edward I recognized from the hospital, at her side. She waved cheerily, a bandage covering almost a whole side of her face. She continued on with Edward, and I shifted my feet awkwardly.

"So they're best friends?" I questioned Mike.

"Since birth. They're like connected." He answered. "I wouldn't worry about it though, Edward already has millions of girls trailing after him." He said, catching the look on my face. I nodded, watching Bella and Edward talk. He had those movie star good looks, with perfect hair and teeth, and a sort of weird innocence in his green eyes, it was no wonder girls hung on his every word. I watched him hug Bella tenderly, and smiled as she made her way over here.

BELLA POV

My stomach fluttered once more as I heard Edward start his engine and give me one last reassuring smile before driving away. I took a deep breath and walked in the direction of Carlos, Mike, and Tyler. I greeted them all with a smile.

"Hey Carlos, Mike, Tyler." I said, giving the last two a strange look.

"Hey Bells," Mike said, looking awkward. "We'll get going." He said, pulling Tyler by the arm and hurrying off.

"English paper is due Monday!" I called after him, knowing he would forget. He waved me off as he climbed into Tyler's car, and they drove away. I bit my lip, and turned to smile at Carlos. "Hi." I said.

"Hello." He greeted me in a friendly way, smiling, showing me his white teeth. We stood there awkwardly for a minute, and then he uttered a nervous chuckle and I followed him to his car, an okay looking, pasty blue Honda. I got in the passenger's side, and he clambered in the other side quickly, taking a deep breath. "So, where to?" He asked.

"There's a nice new place by the library." I suggested in a friendly way. He nodded, and drove in that direction. We sat in a sort of companionable silence, until we reached the new Starbucks beside the library, and headed inside. Once we had ordered our drinks, and sat down at the table, Carlos cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to be rude, but what happened?" He asked in a curious way. I half smiled.

"No, it's okay. I said I would explain. Just don't laugh" I said, and he looked ready to listen.

"I promise." He said.

"Okay, well about a week and a half ago, there was this party at Mike's house. He has a big one every year, and everyone always goes." I started. He nodded, indicating that I should go on. "Well I drank a little too much than I should have." I said, and he smiled. "There's this one guy, James Benna, who likes me. He's not the romantic type, you could say. Sort of the school ass, but everyone seems to love him."

"I know the type." Carlos nodded.

"Yeah, well he was trying to persuade me to do stuff with him, but I told him I didn't want too. So he gave up and asked me to come for a drive with him instead. And of course, I was wrecked, so I agreed, just happy that he wasn't touching me anymore." I said, Carlos was looking worried now. "Well he took me to that campsite, and hiked us far up the trail. And then he started to try and persuade me again. This time, I had no idea where I was, and it scared me. I kneed him in the groin, and he left me there. I stumbled around for a little, and hit myself really badly on a tree, which is how I got this." I motioned to my bandage. Then I fell over, and hit my head on a rock, and started to lose consciousness." I said, my throat dry from talking. I took a sip of my drink, and half smiled again, at the awkwardness of telling this story, one that I had told countless times in the past week.

"Go on..." He encouraged.

"Well, the first thing I could think of was to call Edward, since he's on my speed dial. So I did that, and told him I needed help, right before blacking out." I said. Carlos looked even more worried now. "Now Edward, he has always hated James. Since we were in grade 8, when he had a fight with him about some girl. They both walked away badly hurt. But anyways, Edward can hold his liquor, and he drove over to the campsite, where he knew James would have taken me. He found me about half an hour later up the trail, and panicked. He took me back the the car and tried to clean the minor scrapes and stuff but he couldn't treat the big one. So he took me back to the party and let my brother Emmett watch me for a couple minutes while he beat up James." I finished matter of factly.

"Woah. That's insane!" Carlos exclaimed. "What happened after?" He asked.

"They took me back home and called Edward's dad over, because he's a doctor."

"I know." Carlos smiled. "I work with him."

"Oh, right." I blushed, forgetting where I had met him, and that he was a college intern. "Well he stitched it up and I stayed home from school for a couple days. I'm still getting over the concussion from hitting my head on the rock." I said.

"Ouch." He winced. "Are you okay?" I nodded.

"I guess I am now. I just get stared at in school and have to restrain Edward from attacking James in the hallways." I chuckled quietly.

"Why restrain him?" Carlos asked. There was a minute of silence. I shrugged. For the rest of our date, we talked and chatted easily, and I had a really good time. He drove me home after we walked around the library square for a while, and it was just getting dark as I bounced up the steps to my door. I turned back and waved as he drove off. I got inside and ignored Emmett's pestering questions, going up to my room. I picked up the phone and dialed Edward's number, waiting restlessly for him to pick up.

"Bells." He said into the phone, sounding happy. "Everything go okay?"

"It went amazing." I said, and he chuckled.

"That's nice. So I won't be beating anyone up?"

"Nope." I said happily.

"Hold on." He said patiently. I heard Carlisle calling to him in the background. "My dad says you have to change your bandage tonight."

"Oh..." I said, uncertain I would be able to do it without fainting. He chuckled.

"I'll be over in a bit." He said, and I smiled, hanging up. I shrugged. It was Friday night anyway, and Edward and I always had sleepovers.

EDWARD POV

I pulled my arms through the sleeves of my jacket, and walked out into the brisk night air, whistling as I made my way down to Bella's. I was in a strange mood. Jealous of Carlos. Angry with Carlos. Angry with James. Relieved that Bella still wanted me to come over and help her. I don't know what I had been expecting, a sudden end to our friendship because of one Starbucks date with hospital boy? I laughed to myself, but felt that weird feeling in my stomach again. Emmett's greeted me with a smile as he shifted through university papers at the kitchen table. I returned it with one of my own, and headed up the stairs. I smiled again as I passed the framed picture of Bella and I at the beach on the way. We were about seven, and it was the summer before Renee had left. I was kneeling proudly next to a magnificent sandcastle we had built, in purple swim trunks, and Bella stood behind me, smiling, her hands on my shoulders, wearing a blue little mermaid one piece, her curly hair up in a sloppy ponytail, dry sand crusted to her legs.

_We had been working on it for hours, our beautiful fortress. It had three lookout towers and a mote I had filled with sea water, a piece of flat driftwood crossing it like a bridge. It had a seashell door, sea glass windows and tiny flags on each turret, courtesy of Bella explaining to me that it needed a homey touch._

_"Finished!" She exclaimed as she stuck the last flag in. We sighed simultaneously._

_"Perfect." I said, gazing at it in wonder. It was the best we had made yet._

_"What should we call it?" She asked me. I stared at it for a while._

_"Swasen Manor." I said, and she looked at me in confusion. "It's a combination of our last names." She nodded in comprehension._

_"I like that name." She agreed. "DAD!" She called Charlie over. He was resting his back on a log, reading the paper. He looked up, and smiled. He lifted his camera and snapped the picture._

"Hey." She said warmly, grinning as I came in.

"Ready?" I asked, holding up the package of new bandages and ointment Carlisle had given me. She looked queasy, and I moved over to hug her. She wrapped her arms around me.

"I'm glad you're helping." She said. I just smiled.

"Okay." I said steadily, concentrating on not hurting her tender skin, 15 minutes later as she sat on the counter in the bathroom. I stood in front of her, and gently removed the tape and bandage from her face. It was swollen and scary looking, like I had never seen her. It looked like it hurt badly, and I could see the stitches in it. I winced.

"It's bad, isn't it?" She asked, the hand that was gripping my shirt moved up to my forearm.

"Well..." I said, not wanting to tell her the truth. She gulped, and turned around to face the mirror, jumping off the counter. She gasped, and raised her shaking fingers to touch it lightly. I stood behind her. She reached behind her and wrapped her arms around me.

"It's terrible! I'll never look the same again!" She groaned.

"Bells, that's not true. It'll fade. My dad gave me some scar ointment, it'll help it heal into less of a noticeable scar." I reassured her. She didn't say a word, just stared at herself in the mirror, her brown eyes shiny. And then, suddenly, she vomited into the toilet. I held her hair and rubbed her back, and she just cried and vomited. Charlie and Emmett came to see what was wrong, and she straightened up, holding a towel to her face gingerly, wiping her mouth and tears. She took a deep breath.

"Sorry." She said weakly. I smiled reassuringly again, and dabbed the cream and scar ointment gently to the wound. The bruising around it was turning yellow, healing. I produced clean gauze bandages from my bag, and taped them neatly onto her cheek again. She sighed when I was finished, and Emmett and Charlie went back to what they had been doing. Bella filled the cup beside the sink with tap water and took a deep drink, rinsing the taste of vomit from her mouth.

"Are you alright?" I asked. She nodded. "You're sure?"

"I'm fine. It's just a little jarring, you know?" She sniffled. I nodded.

"I know, beautiful." I said as we went back into her room. She lay down, already dressed in sweatpants and a baggy shirt. I sat down beside her, and we were silent for a while. The quiet gave me a chance to think, and my mind strayed to thoughts of James again. I found myself clenching my fists.

"Edward, what's up?" Bella asked, looking concerned.

"Oh you know, just the familar killing rush." I said sarcastically through my teeth.

"James?" She questioned. I nodded. He couldn't get away with this. Something more serious had to be done. A court order? A sentence? I would talk to Charlie about what was possible. She touched my shoulder. "Sing." She said, shifting her weight. I looked down at her.

"Sing what?" I asked.

"Tarzan song." She smiled. I chuckled. When Bella and I were small, we had loved Tarzan, it was our favourite movie in the world. For the talent show one year, I had sung one of the songs from the soundtrack, on Bella's whim. And ever since, she had been asking me to sing it.

"Okay." I said, and leaned back against the headboard. She settled herself down, bringing the quilt up to hide her chin. I loved the words to this song. They had always described exactly how I felt about Bella.

BELLA POV

I rested my sore head against the pillow, and sighed as Edward began to sing my favourite song. It made me feel safe and protected, and when he sang it it gave me a warm, happy feeling that always put me to sleep. I really needed that right now.

_Come stop your crying_ _It will be all right_ _Just take my hand Hold it tight _ _I will protect you_ _from all around you_ _I will be here_ _Don't you cry _ _For one so small,_ _you seem so strong_ _My arms will hold you,_ _keep you safe and warm_ _This bond between us_ _Can't be broken_ _I will be here_ _Don't you cry _ _'Cause you'll be in my heart_ _Yes, you'll be in my heart_ _From this day on_ _Now and forever more _ _You'll be in my heart_ _No matter what they say_ _You'll be here in my heart, always _ _Why can't they understand_ _the way we feel_ _They just don't trust_ _what they can't explain_ _I know we're different but,_ _deep inside us_ _We're not that different at all _ _And you'll be in my heart_ _Yes, you'll be in my heart_ _From this day on_ _Now and forever more _ _Don't listen to them_ _'Cause what do they know_ _We need each other,_ _to have, to hold_ _They'll see in time_ _I know _ _When destiny calls you_ _You must be strong_ _I may not be with you_ _But you've got to hold on_ _They'll see in time_ _I know_ _We'll show them together _ _'Cause you'll be in my heart_ _Yes, you'll be in my heart_ _From this day on,_ _Now and forever more _ _Oh, you'll be in my heart_ _No matter what they say_ _You'll be in my heart, always_ _Always _

I smiled as the song ended, feeling sleepy already. Edward smiled too.

"Good job." I murmured. He chuckled. "I love that one."

"Thanks Bella." He said. I closed my eyes again.

"Night. Far away places." I said.

"Far away places, Bells. That's right." He said. And then, I drifted into a perfect sleep.

**Thanks! What did you think? Advice? Criticism? Comments? I'd love to hear them! Review box…**

**xox**


	13. Chapter 11 No Prince After All

Hey guys So people have been pressuring me and saying I should get Bella and Edward together sooon I kinda wanted to go farther with the whole Carlos thing but it just wasn't working out in my brain so I gave it a rest and just skipped describing the whole thing and got down to this…Don't worry Edward and Bella will be together sooonish. Not yet, but the story will come to a close…soonish. I'm not saying when

EMMETT POV

It didn't surprise me at all to see Edward walking down the stairs the next morning, scratching his stomach lazily. I chuckled. It was Saturday, and it was Bella and Edward's sleepover tradition.

"Hey." He said sleepily, plopping down on a chair beside me. I had been working on these college applications forever.

"Hey." I said, and he put his head in his hands. He looked kind of put out.

"Something wrong?" I asked. He looked up, pained.

"How long do you think this will go on?" He asked, an edge to his voice. "I mean, I'm almost 19. She's 17. We can't keep having little sleepovers anymore." I was shocked. Bella and Edward were like peas and carrots and I had never once considered it might not stay that way.

"What do you mean?" I asked him, confused.

"Dude, seriously." He said, and then left, shutting the door a little harder than usual.

EDWARD POV

I was trying to send a message here, trying to get someone other than Rosalie on my side. I couldn't keep spending nights at Bella's, singing to her, sleeping beside her. I definitely couldn't keep waking up to find her angel face beside mine, her eyes closed, hair everywhere. It was going to my head. What was I going to do?

2 MONTHS LATER

BELLA POV

I packed the last pair of socks into my suitcase and sighed, closing it tightly. In a week I was leaving with Edward for his first Juliard concert in New York. Even though he wasn't technically attending just yet, they had asked a few of their best new students to perform. They provided a free hotel room for three nights, all inclusive, and a free ticket for one guest. Edward had decided he would bring me, to my great delight, and I felt butterflies of excitement in my stomach. Carlos helped me zip up the suitcase, and smiled at me. We had been involved for about two months now, and were technically dating. He was the closest I had ever come to real love, and I felt like we could make our relationship go farther than high school. I really did.

"So, you have everything?" He asked me, stepping closer and brushing his thumb over the raised pink wound on my cheek. It was healing well, according to Carlisle, and scarring should be minimal. I didn't need a bandage anymore, but it had taken me a while to get over the embarrassment of going out in public with a big gash on my face. Carlos said it didn't matter to him, and I believed him of course. But Edward, on the other hand, was still cautious. He was polite and friendly towards Carlos, but not overly open. He was closed off and their talk was usually tense and awkward.

"I think so." I giggled.

"You pack early." He commented.

"I know, it's a habit. I always have." I shrugged. "At least I'm prepared."

"You are." He said, kissing me quickly before heading towards my bedroom door. "I have to get back to work."

"Okay." I smiled. "See you later."

EDWARD POV

Carlos didn't like me at all, and I knew it. Bella refused to admit it, but there was just some things guys knew. The way he looked at me. He hated when Bella and I spent time together, and he was really getting on my nerves. But he seemed to treat her alright, not caring about her injury or anything. Except for sometimes when he was angry or upset, he would talk to her like he was more important. Not violent language or anything, just the tone of his voice was disrespectful, and it made me want to kill him. I walked through the halls of the hospital, on my way to drop off some papers in my father's office he had asked me to bring from home, when Carlos turned a corner.

"Oh, hi Edward." He said.

"Hey Carlos." I said casually back, trying to to sound friendly.

"I need to talk to you." He said. I looked at him strangely, what could it be about? Bella?

"Okay?" I said, unsure. He pulled me into a corridor that no one ever used anymore, and dropped his friendly manner. His eyes narrowed and he looked furious.

"I've been putting up with this for two months now, and it just can't go any farther. I'm not stupid, I know how you feel about her." He said, scowling.

"Wait, what?" I asked.

"Bella. She's mine buddy." He said.

"Dude, we're just best friends. Calm down." I promised him, which was true.

"You expect me to believe that?" He spit at me. Now I was angry. I hated when people accused Bella and I of being more than we were. Hated it it. Although I wished we were, it still pissed me off.

"Yeah, I do." I said firmly.

"Well you can cut the crap. Stay away from her."

"She's my best friend. I can't just stay away. And besides, she's coming to New York with me, so how is that going to work?" I asked angrily.

"I don't care if she's your best friend or not. She's my girlfriend, you've had her all your life, so you can live. Now leave her alone." He growled. "As for the trip, I will be doing all in my power to prevent her going."

"Excuse me?" I asked.

"You heard me." He said, staring me down. I stood my ground, scowling back.

"You will never know her like I do." I said.

"What?" He questioned.

"Do you know what she wants to be when she's older, or what college she's always wanted to go to? Do you know what she's afraid of, or what her mother's name was?" I asked. He looked blank. "Do you know what the little diamond scar on her left knee is from? Do you know what the favorite present she ever got was? Do you know who her first kiss was with, or who she idolizes? Do you even know her favorite colour?" I questioned him some more. He didn't say anything. I was seething with anger, and turned on my heel, walking away from him.

CARLOS POV

I couldn't deny that they were best friends. I had seen the baby pictures, the toddler pictures. The images of them smiling at each other, eating birthday cake, playing in the sprinkler, camping, on the beach, at school, everything. But I saw the way Edward looked at her. It was so obvious it made me want to scream. Bella was oblivious. She still wore his soccer jersey, still was perfectly comfortable around him in her underwear, still believed all they were was best friends. When would she realize that boys and girls just couldn't be best friends without other thoughts arising. She had assured me nothing had ever happened between them, and I believed her, but I just had to get rid of Edward. After work, I headed back to Bella's house, and knocked. She opened the door, dressed in sweatpants, and let me in, smiling and pressing herself against me. I wrapped my arms around her unenthusiastically and returned her kiss. To tell you the truth, I was just about done with Bella. Our relationship wasn't going anywhere fast, and I needed something new, a change of scene. Someone more risque. I had been planning to break up with Bella for a while, but I just had to get my justice with Edward first. We sat at the kitchen table, and I realized no one else was home.

"Hey Bella?" I called her attention. She looked up from her tea, and smiled.

"Mmm?"

"Is there anything between you and Edward?" I asked bluntly. She looked shock, her eyes emptied.

"Carlos, I already told you. He's my-"

"Best friend, I know. But have you seen the way he looks at you?" I asked her, watching her reaction carefully. She looked confused.

"Carlos, you're being ridiculous. First of all, that would just be weird. And second of all, Edward has been with basically every girl in our school at one point and can get them back with the snap of a finger, so why would he want me?" She asked. I saw no recognition in her eyes, and it just angered me more. They were good at hiding it. I decided I might as well just break up with her now and save her the pain. I could still get even with Edward, he would hate me after this.

"Don't lie to me, Bella." I said. She shook her head.

"I'm not, Carlos, you have to trust me." She pleaded. It was silent for a while. I stood up quickly, bumping the table. "Where are you going?" She asked.

"I don't know. We're over Bella." I said simply. It was surprisingly easy, I had never felt anything insanely intense for her.

"What?" She asked quietly.

"I said we're over." I said again.

"Just like that?" She asked. I nodded.

"I know something between you two is going on behind my back, and I'm through with you." I told her. She looked shocked. I turned and left, and heard her sob once before I closed the door.

BELLA POV

"Hey Bella?" He said. I looked up from my tea, taking in his nice features, his beautiful lips as he said my name. I wanted to kiss them.

"Mmm?" I asked, still in my fantasy.

"Is there anything between you and Edward?" He asked bluntly. This called me out of my dream, and I was shocked. Me and Edward?

"Carlos, I already told you. He's my-" I tried to say.

"Best friend, I know. But have you seen the way he looks at you?" He asked me. I was totally confused. Edward didn't look at me any special way, if he did I would notice. And that was a weird thought.

"Carlos, you're being ridiculous. First of all, that would just be weird. And second of all, Edward has been with basically every girl in our school at one point and can get them back with the snap of a finger, so why would he want me?" I asked him. He looked very angry.

"Don't lie to me, Bella." He said. I shook my head, I wasn't lying.

"I'm not, Carlos, you have to trust me." I pleaded for him to understand. It was silent for a while. He stood up quickly, bumping his hip against the table. "Where are you going?" I asked.

"I don't know. We're over Bella." He said simply. I almost gasped. What was he saying? He couldn't be serious, because of Edward? I could not believe this. I thought we actually had something.

"What?" I asked quietly, willing it to have been only my imagination that had heard him say that.

"I said we're over." He said again, and my stomach dropped.

"Just like that?" I asked. He nodded, and sneered.

"I know something between you two is going on behind my back, and I'm through with you." He told me. I would protest and defend myself, but what was the point? He turned and left, closing the door. I let out a sob, sitting at the kitchen table, not knowing what to do. I sat there for twenty minutes, no one was home and I couldn't understand what was happening. I needed someone. I picked up my phone, and speed dialed Edward. I needed my best friend, and I didn't care what Carlos thought. He picked up quickly.

"Hey." He answered cheerily.

"Edward?" I said his name through choking back tears.

"Bella, beautiful. What's the matter?" He asked, his voice changing from happy to concerned.

"Can you come over?" I asked thickly.

"I'll be right there." He said, hanging up. He was at my door in less than fifteen minutes, and a fresh round of tears overwhelmed me as he came through the door. He held his arms open, and I ran into them, wrapping my arms around his secure waist, and burying my face in his warm shirt. He did the same, his head resting my my hair. "What happened?" He asked.

"Carlos broke up with me." I said in a small voice. "He thinks were more than best friends."

EDWARD POV

I enveloped her warm body with mine, and felt her shake with tears. She gripped me tightly, and I did the same, comforting her. I remembered back to when we were 13, and my dog had died. Bella came over and stayed with me, rubbing my shoulders and whispering comforting words. She was the only person I had ever let see me cry past the age of 11. She stayed the whole night, absorbing my pain with hugs, and just being there. I tried to do the same for her now, stroking her hair.

"What happened?" I asked. I had a feeling.

"Carlos broke up with me." She said in a small voice. "He thinks were more than best friends." An intense wave of anger rolled over me, and I clenched my fists. If anyone hated that accusation more than me, it was Bella. And now he had gone and broken her heart. She was having the worst couple months of her life, after the accident with James. And I had thought it was getting better. She had as well what with her new, happy relationship and her healing wounds. How could he have done this? How could he not see she didn't need this right now?

"Shh, Bella." I said soothingly, rocking her side to side. I led her to the couch where we sat down side by side, Bella leaning into me and sniffling.

"I'm hopeless." She whispered. I looked down at her tear streaked face.

"What?" I asked.

"I have never been in a relationship for more than three months. I'm plain and ordinary and no guy wants me. It's pathetic." She sniffled.

"Oh Bella don't be silly." I said, stroking her hair.

"I'm not. It's all my fault Carlos left, why shouldn't he? He can do better than me." She said.

"Bella, don't you ever for a minute believe this is your fault. Do you hear me? Carlos was lucky to have someone like you and he let you go." I told her honestly.

"Stop." She whispered.

"No, I won't stop. Bella listen to me, it's his loss. You are brilliant, you're the nicest person I know and you're beautiful too. You're a prize, Bells." I said, trying to make her see.

BELLA POV

"No, I won't stop. Bella listen to me, it's his loss. You are brilliant, you're the nicest person I know and you're beautiful too. You're a prize, Bells." He told me, and my stomach filled with warmth. Edward always knew what to say. I thought back to the time when Edward had started calling me beautiful as a nickname, and almost smiled.

We were walking along the cemented path that wound around the park. It was almost dark, and the summer night air was filling my lungs. Bitter tears ran down my cheeks and I tried to stop them. Edward and I had just left a party. We were 15, and after my first time drinking I had decided to lay off a little. Edward, on the other hand, threw his arm over my shoulder and laughed loudly. He wasn't trashed, just buzzed enough to have some fun.

"It's a really nice night." He slurred happily. I nodded. He looked down at me. "What's the matter, Bella Smella?"

"Nothing." I said, crossing my arms.

"Come on, tell me." He said quietly. It was silent for a while, before I spoke.

"I'm ugly." I said softly. Jessica had said it herself. It wasn't like I didn't know she hated me. But tonight, she had called me an ugly bitch after catching me talking casually to Mike, and everyone had laughed along with her. I just couldn't stand her anymore, she had confirmed my fears.

"WHAT?" Edward shouted. I signaled him to be quiet. "Sorry." He whispered.

"It's true." I said. Edward stopped walking and turned me to face him, putting both his hands on my shoulders.

"You listen to me. You are ten times more beautiful than any other girl back there. And I can say that, because best friends only tell each other the truth." He said, smiling a crooked smile.

"No I'm not." I said, looking down.

"Bella, you are. Trust me on this. I am a guy, and you are by far the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. You just happen to be my best friend in the universe, so it would be weird if I thought of you that way." He said, making a face. I made the same face, and he laughed.

"You think so?" I asked.

"I know so. Don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise." He said.

"Okay." I said in a small voice. I didn't really believe him, but his words comforted me and made me feel warmer than I had before. He smiled, and we walked on, arms around each others shoulders, headed towards my house for the night.

An hour later, we were watching War Of The Worlds on the couch, a blanket pulled over us.

"Are you sure you still want to come?" Edward asked me, talking about his Juliard concert in New York. I sniffed, and nodded.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world, Masen." I assured him.

"Cause if you don't feel up to it, I wouldn't mind." He said.

"Edward, I'm going with you." I said firmly, and he tucked me closer to him.

EMMETT POV

I walked in the door at about 10:30, after a movie with Rose, and heard music coming from the living room. I walked in to find Edward and Bella, Bella leaning on Edward's shoulder, the two of them asleep. The credits of a movie were playing on the screen, and I shook my head. My baby sister had tear streaks down her face, and my heart lurched, what was the matter? My eyes traced the raised pink line that ran along her face, and the way her hand was clutched around Edward in a death grip. His head lolled on the back of the couch, peaceful in sleep, and it wasn't even weird. Usually, guys would feel strange seeing their guy friend passed out on the couch with his little sister, but I remembered my mother or father calling me in to the living room when I was nine or ten to see a seven year old Bella and Edward asleep just like this, ice cream all over their faces, the credits of Tarzan rolling on the screen. We would laugh and then my mother would carry Bella while my father carried Edward up to Bella's room, still shaking their heads with laughter after they came down. It made me smile to see that almost eighteen year old Bella and Edward still did the same things, although we couldn't carry them up the stairs anymore. I decided to leave them and find out what was causing Bella to cry in the morning. I was dog tired and I headed upstairs, falling into bed.

Like? Don't like? Review please I hope this was okay for everyone, turns out Carlos is a dick. Well we all knew it would happen.

**xox**


	14. Chapter 12 New York

**Hey everyone! This is sort of a short update, but all I could manage at the moment! If you want to see the outfits Bella & Edward are wearing at the presentation dinner, follow this link—.com/cgi/profile?id=1163576**

**Ignore the random shoe in the corner :)**

**Thanks!**

EDWARD POV

It was six days since Carlos and Bella broke up, and we were officially off to New York. She was doing somewhat better, and I had seen her smile recently, but she still gave off an aura of sadness. Charlie hugged her goodbye, and then Emmett, Alice, Rose and Jasper. I hugged everyone too, and when Rosalie wrapped her arms around me lightly, she whispered in my ear.

"Tell her." She said quietly. I looked at her, not understanding for a minute. And then she gave me a look, and I got it. I shook my head vehemently, and she rolled her eyes. Everyone wished me good luck, and with one last hug from my mother, we boarded our plane, and settled down in the seats.

"Nervous?" Bella asked me, smiling slightly as I ran a hand through my hair. I nodded. "Don't be."

"I can't help it." I told her honestly.

"You've done this before." She reassured me.

"Yeah, but not on this scale, this is way bigger than anything I've ever performed. It's basically my ticket into the school." I worried, buckling my seat belt.

"Don't be silly, you've already been accepted." She said, turning her cell phone off.

"Yeah, but-" I began to say, but she cut me off with one look, and the plane started to gain altitude.

BELLA POV

The plane touched down smoothly at the New York airport, and I had almost forgotten about Carlos. Edward and I had played games and laughed on the plane, and the mounting excitement for Edward's performance was building up in my stomach, pushing all thoughts of his harsh words away. We left the plane and I breathed the fresh, clean air. It was renewing somehow, and I sighed. Edward looked down at me, and seeing that nothing was wrong, smiled. I wrapped an arm around him momentarily, and gave him a squeeze.

"I'm excited for you." I said.

"Yeah?" He asked as we made our way through the baggage check and then were dismissed to hail a taxi.

"What songs will you play?" I asked curiously as we finally flagged one down and piled in the back.

"Well we all get three songs. You'll see." He smiled mischievously.

"You're not gonna tell me?" I asked, poking him in the ribs.

"Nope." He said, popping the p. I looked out the window, shaking my head, and took in the city. I had been here once before when I was 12 for a family vacation, but only for a week. It was about 5 in the evening now, and the sun was barely setting. The taxi driver dropped us off at our hotel, a five star, high class building that Julliard was paying for it's students to stay in. We took the elevator up to the seventh floor, and as the door opened, Edward bumped into someone, literally.

"Kyle?" His voice sounded surprised.

"Oh, hey Edward." The boy named Kyle looked distracted. He had mousy brown hair that curled, and glasses, but nice lips and teeth. His eyes were brown, and they were framed with thick lashes. He was sorting through a whole bunch of papers, and dropped a couple on his way into the elevator. I bent down and handed them to him. He looked up, and smiled. "Hi."

"Hello." I said in a friendly way. He seemed like a sweetie. Not my type, but definitely friend material.

"Who's this?" He asked Edward. I rolled my eyes, not about to let Edward introduce me like a child. I stuck out my hand.

"I'm Bella." I said, and he shook my outstretched hand, looking awkward as he fumbled with papers again.

"The best friend. Edward told me about you." He said knowingly. I blushed.

"You did?" I looked to Edward. He shrugged, smiling. Kyle said goodbye, hurrying off to organize something. It turned out Edward knew most of the people staying on this floor from his various visitation trips to Julliard and through summer programs, camps, developments and stuff like that. We met a pair of twins who were talented drum artists, a handful of singer/songwriters like Edward, and on the last door before ours, a curvy woman a couple years younger than Esme, named Brooke. She smiled at Edward in a strange way, and he smiled politely back. She was the schools coordinator and apparently a big shot.

"Brooke, this is Bella." He said, motioning to me. I waved, and she waggled her lacquered nails at me. "My best friend."

"Hello Bella, nice to meet you." She said sweetly.

"You too." I said back. There was something weird about her. As we turned the corner to get to our room, she smiled at Edward in what was definitely a seductive way, and then shut herself back in her room, now arguing loudly with someone on her cell phone. I gave Edward a look as he fiddled with the lock on our door.

"She's a piece of work, I know." He chuckled.

"You noticed?" I said sarcastically. He laughed again.

"I have to be nice to her. She's the one who got me here." He said, and I rolled my eyes as he finally opened the door. It was beautiful, with mahogany floors and a large white, fluffy bed. The windows were huge and arched and framed with flowy gauze curtains. The counters of the small kitchen were granite, and the pictures were modern.

"Ooh!" I gasped as we entered. I fell down on the bed, laughing, and Edward smiled.

"It's good to hear your laugh, beautiful." He told me. I sat up, looking at him. "Are you okay?" He asked me.

"Yes, I think I am." I said, thinking about it first.

"Good, cause he was a jerk." Edward said simply as he dropped our suitcases and headed into the washroom. I heard the water start and Edward climb into the shower quickly. I sighed, letting thoughts of my break up consume me again.

EDWARD POV

I let the hot water run over my back and sighed. Bella looked beautiful, even in sweats and a college sweatshirt, her hair a mess, looking travel tired. I couldn't stand it. I had been doing my best these past months to act normal around her, act like I didn't want to declare my love right on the spot. I tried to act like she wasn't the only one, like I wasn't madly in love with my best friend. I felt so caged in, I had always told Bella everything, and now there was something between us that I just couldn't say. It felt wrong keeping something from her. I wondered how long it would take her to find out, she always did eventually. I winced, dreading the moment, and considered just spilling it all out, before coming to my senses and shaking my head. I stepped out of the shower and dried off, pulling on a white dress shirt and some dark jeans. I came back out into the main room to find Bella sitting cross legged on the bed, flipping through TV channels lazily. I couldn't help but crack a smile at the expressions on her face as the channel changed.

"Get dressed, Bella Smella. There's a presentation dinner tonight." I said, and she looked at me in a way that suggested she didn't want to go.

"Seriously?" She asked me. I nodded.

"Oh come on, you're my date. You have to go with me!" I teased.

"Fine." She whined, hopping off the bed and pulling things out of her suitcase.

BELLA POV

Edward emerged from the washroom in a crisp, white linen button up shirt and dark blue jeans. His hair was wet, and he smiled at me.

"Get dressed, Bella Smella. There's a presentation dinner tonight." He said, and my stomach dropped. I was so tired.

"Seriously?" I asked, and he nodded.

"Oh come on, you're my date. You have to go with me!" He said in a teasing tone, and I rolled my eyes.

"Fine." I whined, hopping off the bed. I unzipped my suitcase and wondered what I should wear. Edward had told me to bring a few formal things, and Alice had taken care of that. I held up a soft pink, strapless silk Chiffon dress, and groaned.

"Alice..." I muttered. Edward looked over, now attaching a black tie to his collared shirt. "Too formal?" I asked him.  
"No, it's nice." He said, smiling. I looked at it one more time, and then, finding nothing better, sighed and headed towards the bathroom. I slipped the dress on, and was surprised to find that it was very comfortable, fitting very nicely on my frame. Usually, I hated dresses, but this one was maybe the best I had ever worn. How had Alice known it would suit me so well? I shrugged, smiling a half smile, and began doing my hair. I let it fall loosely in a messy bun, but decided that wasn't presentable. I considered straightening it, but then remembered how flat my hair looked when Alice did that. I settled on letting it fall casually over my shoulders in soft curls, one small section pinned back. I walked back out of the bathroom and turned to Edward.  
"Do I look okay?" I asked him. He looked my way, and smiled.  
"Of course. You look more than okay." He said. I blushed as usual.  
"Thanks." I said softly. He finally succeeded in tying his tie. "You look good." I told him truthfully. He smiled brightly.  
"Thanks." He said happily. I looked in my suitcase one more time, and found the necklace Edward had given me for my last birthday. It was a tiny, solid silver heart on a thin chain. I put it on, and bit my lip, not wanting to wear the low, light cream coloured heels of Alice's she had thrown in my suitcase. I grudgingly put them on, not having any other shoes, and stood up. Luckily, in eighth grade Alice had taught me how to walk in heels at one of our sleepovers, and I wasn't completely helpless. Usually having uncomfortable stilts attached to my feet wasn't a Bella sort of activity. "Ready?" Edward asked me. I nodded, and we headed down stairs. The presentation dinner was being held in the hotel's ballroom, which was on the ground floor. The room had silver and glass chandeliers hanging from the ceiling, and was lit softly. Round tables were arranged around the room, white tablecloths over them. Glass cups and plates were arranged neatly on top of them, and there was a stage set up at the front, which I guessed was for guest speakers. The room was already relatively full, and we took a seat with Kyle from before and his twelve year old sister, Kira, whom he had brought with his extra ticket.

**xox**


	15. Chapter 13 Dance

**Hey guys, this is just a short chapter, hope you enjoy. Poor Edward **** Look up the song, it's good.**

EDWARD POV

I tried to keep my eyes off Bella. Damn Alice and her plans, making her look even more stunning than usual. She was still shorter than me in her cream heels, and her light pink dress came down to mid thigh. I could barely stand it. I wondered vaguely if Alice knew I liked Bells more than friends, and wondered if she had intended to kill me.

I watched as Brooked stepped up to the microphone on the impromptu stage set up at the front of the room.

"Welcome, Julliard students and performers. Welcome, guests. These next three days we have quite a show for you. I would like to say that all of these young men and women worked very hard to get to this position, and are all very talented in unique ways. They are well on their ways to becoming successful and dedicated artists of all kinds. I would like to say to you all something my Grandmother once told me, when I was leaving for college. If you're feeling frightened about what comes next, don't be. Embrace the uncertainty. Allow it to lead you places. Be brave as it challenges you to exercise both your heart and your mind as you create your own path towards happiness, don't waste time with regret. Spin wildly into your next action. Enjoy the present, each moment, as it comes; because you'll never get another one quite like it. And if you should ever look up and find yourself lost, simply take a breath and start over. Retrace your steps and go back to the purest place in your heart.. where your hope lives. You'll find you're way again." She ended her introduction with this quote, and I couldn't help feeling strange, like it struck a chord somewhere deep down. I sat back and watched the students with last names beginning with A start to go up to the stage.

Despite her earlier complaints on the subject of attending this dinner, Bella was shooting smiles at me the whole time, bouncing up and down on her seat every time my name was announced in a list, and she nearly fell off her chair when it was my turn to go up and accept a handshake from the principal and the board members. I smiled back at her as I wrung the mans sweaty hand, her face was alight with pride. As I sat back down in my seat again and watched the other students get called up, she leaned over to whisper in my ear.

"Good job, Masen." She said, squeezing my shoulder. I grinned back, and hugged her.

"Thanks Bells." I said genuinely. We watched the last person, someone named Samantha Zeline, accept her handshake, and then watched as Brooke stepped up to the microphone again. She cleared her throat audibly, and then smiled.

"Well, thank you all for coming! I would like to take a moment to appreciate our many students." She announced, and everyone commenced clapping very hard. I beamed and clapped along with them. The noise quieted down, and Brooked smiled again. "Enjoy the dinner!" She said, walking off stage, her heels clicking. The dinner was wonderful, but the thing that worried me was when people started to get up and make their way to a medium sized opening that was serving as a dance floor. There was music playing, and as Kyle took his little sister to dance, I gulped, knowing I would have to dance with Bella. I didn't know if I could bear it. She pulled me up, giggling, and I was forced to come dance. We stood on the floor, and I wrapped my arms around her slender waist. The silky fabric of the dress was heavenly and cool, and her warm skin underneath was even better. She rolled her eyes, and kicked off her heels, setting them by the side of the floor. I laughed, and welcomed her back into my arms. Her head came up to my chest just underneath my chin, and we fit that way perfectly. She wrapped her arms around my neck at first, smiling and laughing as she stepped lightly on my foot by accident. I laughed too, and lifted her easily on top of my feet. She sighed as we swayed easily now to the music.

"I don't think I'll ever get better at this." She said, looking at me.

"I hope not." I said, and she laughed again. She seemed so happy tonight, despite her recent break up with Carlos. "Bella?" I asked.

"Mmm?" She said, looking back up.

"Are you okay?" I asked softly. She huffed, letting a breath out. Maps, by the Yeah Yeah Yeah's was now playing softly overhead.

"I'm just trying to forget about him." She said, all of a sudden looking disgruntled. We swayed steadily, and she bit her lip. "I really am." I stroked the hairline scar on her cheek with my thumb, and she closed her eyes.

"It's going to be alright." I assured her, and she moved her arms from around my neck to wrap around my chest. She rested her head there, and breathed out another sigh. I gently let my head rest on top of hers, closing my eyes and breathing in the peaceful scent of her strawberry shampoo.

Wait.

They don't love you like I love you

Wait.

They don't love you like I love you

Maps...

Wait.

They don't love you like I love you

The song played over head, and I had to restrain myself from kissing her full on the lips right then and there. Why was it that songs always explained exactly how you felt?

**Xox **** Reviews? Next update will be here soon!**


	16. Chapter 14 Long Time No See

**Hey everyone! I know this was kind of unexpected but It just popped into my head. Don't worry; it won't interfere with B+E or the course of their relationship. Thanks! I don't own these characters, except James. **

BELLA POV

I was really glad Edward had talked me into going, because I was enjoying myself. I watched him go up to the stage, looking embarrassed, and accept a handshake. I clapped hard, and he beamed at me, coming back down the aisle now. We watched the rest of the students accept their handshakes and greetings and then listened to Brooke again. But then, waiters began flowing out of the doors at the sides of the stage and laying plates piled with food onto the tables. I was shocked at the service, it was amazing. I couldn't believe Julliard had paid for all this, just for one concert. The dinner was wonderful, and I stuffed my face, not really caring. I hadn't eaten properly in a while, and it felt good. We danced as we had hundreds of times before, and it felt even better. That is, until, Edward brought up the subject of Carlos. My mood took an immediate down turn,

"I'm just trying to forget about him." I said, biting my lip. "I really am." And it was true, I had been trying very hard to just focus on this trip, and nothing else.

"It's going to be alright." He assured me, and I felt a tiny bit better, as Edward always made me feel. I moved my arms from his neck to wrap around his chest instead, hugging as we danced. His head rested on top of mine, a comfortable position. I closed my eyes and listened to the music, completely absorbed in this moment, my bare feet on top of his, his head on mine, my arms around him, our gentle swaying, the song I knew well. I sighed, allowing myself to relax in his arms, and get carried away by the peacefulness of it all.

I woke up the next morning bright and early, with the fall sunshine streaming through the large windows in our room. Edward snored lightly from beside me in flannel pants, his face squished and one arm hanging off the bed. I smiled to myself and got up reluctantly from underneath the down duvet, grabbing a sweater that was hanging on a chair and slipping it over my head. I made my way to the small kitchen and made myself a cup of tea, and brewing some coffee for Edward, knowing he would need it this morning. Tonight was the night of the big concert, and I was expecting Edward to awake any moment in a panic, roused from the peace of sleep. Sure enough, as I sat down with a sigh in one of the arm chairs and curled my knees to my chest, sipping my tea, he stirred. He sat up rubbing his face, and made sleepy noises. I chuckled, waiting for him to realize what day it was. He took a look around, and then his eyes grew wide, and he literally jumped off the bed.

"Holy ****!" He yelled. I laughed heartily now.

"The concert isn't in ten minutes you know..." I told him. He looked at me, running a hand through his hair.

"It's in eight hours! Can you believe this?" He asked, looking shocked.

"Believe what?" I asked him.

"That we're here. That I'm performing in New York City." He said, smiling.

"Yes, I can believe it. You're talented you know." I said, sipping my tea. He sauntered over and grabbed it quickly, taking a long sip. "Hey!" I objected.

"I need caffeine." He shrugged, smiling.

"Yeah, that's why I made coffee. Leave my tea alone." I said, covering it with both my hands.

"Thanks, beautiful." He said, pouring some into a cup, and adding cream, no sugar, as he always took it. He sat down in the chair opposite me and took quick sips, jiggling his knees.

"Stop worrying." I said, and he frowned.

"I can't. I have so much to do." He told me. "Informational meeting at 9, meet the judges lunch at 12, dress rehearsal from 2 until 4, and then set up. The show is at 8." He listed.

"I see. I was thinking I would look around town at some stuff, you know, while you're doing that." I told him, and he smiled.

"Sounds fun, I wish I could go." He said, getting up and pulling an olive green shirt out of his suitcase and putting it on. He finished dressing and rubbed a hand through his hair, sighing and giving up trying to make it behave. It was useless, Edward's hair never behaved. He left an hour later for the informational meeting, after I forced him to eat some eggs and drink some juice, and I began getting ready for my day. Thankfully, Alice had let me pack my own casual clothes, and I chose to wear a pair of stretchy black yoga pants, a white spaghetti strap and I sneakily stole Edward's new navy blue Julliard sweater, tying my curls into a casual knot on the top of my head, some falling out. I put on my comfy boots and scarfed down some oatmeal before heading outside into the brisk air. It wasn't quite cold, but it was just chilly enough to be comfortable in what I was wearing. I walked out of the hotel and down the blistery street, wondering where I should go first. I had about 7 hours before I had to catch up with Edward. I decided on just walking and seeing where it would take me, window-shopping. I needed to buy a congratulations gift for Edward for his show, and wondered vaguely what he would like. I was lost in the clouds as I walked down the busy streets, when I literally bumped into someone.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry!" I exclaimed. The woman, who looked to be about in her forties, mumbled something unintelligible, and then looked up. I was shocked to be staring into a familiar pair of eyes. The last pair of eyes I had expected to meet. It was my mother, quite recognizably, her face more wrinkled and more careworn. Her expression of annoyance changed to one of extreme shock as she looked back into my eyes.

"Bella?" She asked, uncertain. I considered telling her I didn't know whom she was talking about, and walking away, telling her my name was Ashley, but then I saw her eyes again, and I crumpled. I wanted to hug her, to crawl up into her arms and be held like I had when I was small. I wanted to hear her sing me lullabies and laugh as I twirled around the living room. I missed my mother. I nodded, biting my lip. She pulled me off to the side of the walkway so that other people could pass, and looked at me once again in shock. "Bella?" She said again.

"It's me, mom." I said softly, and unexpectedly, she threw her arms around me. She smelled like she always had, of soap and clean laundry, to me one of the most comforting smells in the world. I wrapped my arms around her as well, squeezing her tight and relishing in memories, which all seemed to be flowing back. The last time I had seen her, I was eleven, when she came for Christmas, and even then, it had only been two days. We released each other, and I saw that I wasn't the only one who had tears in their eyes.

"Why are you here?" She asked enthusiastically, "Are you going to Julliard?" She said, eyeing Edward's sweater. "What happened to your face?"

"No, I'll tell you everything in a minute." I winced. "Let's go somewhere."

"I know just the place." She said, literally dragging me across a couple of blocks and sitting us down in a chique looking cafe. She went inside to order a drink, and I quickly texted Edward.

You'll never guess who I'm sitting at a cafe with.-B I sent.

The president?-E.M He jokingly replied.

My mother!-B I sent, putting my phone down as my mother came out again. It was awkward, sitting there with her, after all that had happened. She had left us, and I would never quite forgive her for that, but she was my mother, and deserved to know what was going on.

"So," She began, smiling. "Tell me everything. I want to know about that scar first." She said worriedly.

"It happened a couple months ago, at this party." I said, embarrassed. She urged me to go on, and I shrugged internally. What harm could it do? "I drank too much, and this guy named James Benna took me far up a trail and sort of tried to take advantage of me." I said blushing.

"Oh, Bella." She gasped.

"Well I hit my head on a rock and a tree, giving me this." I motioned to my scar. "And a concussion. Edward found me and brought me home, and then gave James the beating of his life."

"Oh baby." She cooed. I was again overwhelmed with the urge to be a child again, secure and safe in her arms.

"It took a while to heal, but it's getting better now." I said quietly, looking down. She nodded, not knowing what to say.

"And about Julliard?" She asked.

"Oh, I don't go there, Edward does. I'm just here for his entrance concert. We get to stay a free three nights at the Four Seasons." I said. She nodded again.

"How is Edward doing?" She asked me.

"He's good, stressed of course." I said, smiling. She chuckled.

"Still best friends?" She asked.

"The very best." I smiled. There was a silence.

"I can't believe how much you've grown..." She mused.

"Well, I'm almost eighteen." I said matter-of-factly.

"It's insane." She shook her head. "Bella, I hate to be rude, but I don't want to leave just yet. Do you think Edward would mind if I came to see his concert?" She asked nervously.

"I think he would love to see you." I said, smiling. She smiled too, relieved.

Thanks for reading! New update soon. Reviews?

xox


	17. Chapter 15 Proud

**Hey guys **** Here's the next chapter! The next update will be the concert…**

I wondered vaguely about what my mother had been doing these past years, and learned that she had a boyfriend named Phil and was living in New York temporarily as he played Minor League baseball. She seemed enthusiastic and happy to see me and asked how Emmett was, and about the Hales and the Masens, Esme and Emma especially. I wondered why she didn't call her own kids once in a while if she cared about us so much, but I decided to let it go and just enjoy the time I had with her without complications. A pressing weight was weighing on my stomach, reminding me that I needed to get Edward a gift. I stopped by Future Shop and bought him a sleek looking Ipod Touch. Surprisingly, he had never bought himself an Ipod, although he had always wanted one. I felt sort of bad for not choosing a gift that was more heartfelt, but the shop keeper asked if I wanted the back engraved, and I felt a little better as I nodded yes and got "Edward and Bella, Best Friends Forever, 2010." Engraved on the back, just like we had scratched onto the monopoly board so many years ago. I bought a card quickly from the nearest drugstore, my mother waiting outside, and tapped my head with the pen the cashier had lent me, wondering what to write. I placed the pen on the thick white paper and began to write.

Edward,

You've worked so hard to get here. You deserve every moment, every praise, every compliment and every smile you get today.

Always remember that I'll be there for you no matter what, because that's what friends are for. You have been the greatest friend

anyone could ever ask for for seventeen years, and I know it will last until were old and wrinkly. I'm so proud of you, Masen.

Do your best, pretend like it's me you and your guitar alone in your room, and leave them speechless. Most important of all, look for me in the crowd.

I'll be the one going crazy. Don't forget me when you're famous,

Love, Bella.

EDWARD POV

Bells burst back into our hotel room, where I was pacing in a panic. It was 6pm, the show was in two hours. I smiled despite myself as she waltzed in, seeing that she had stolen my Julliard sweater. I craned my neck to see behind her, and smiled awkwardly at Renee, so familiar faced. Her answering smile brought memories to the front of my head, and I shook them away, I needed to concentrate. The dress rehearsal had gone quite well, in fact, I didn't even know why I was so nervous.

"How did everything go?" Bella asked, hugging me quickly.

"Smoothly." I said, sitting down on the bed and running a hand through my hair. Renee looked at me with a strange expression in her eyes, almost loving.

"You aren't a little boy anymore, Edward." She said. I chuckled awkwardly. To tell the truth, I had never forgiven Renee for what she had done to Bella. I almost shuddered, remembering a tiny, 7 year old Bella with empty eyes.

"Nope." I said.

"Congratulations on all this." She said sincerely, looking around.

"Thank you." I said honestly back, and smiled. We all three headed down for a quick dinner at about 7, and then I headed down to the theater to get ready while Renee and Bella went back up to the hotel room to change. Before we parted, Bella pulled me aside.

"Edward, I got you something." She said. I shook my head.

"Oh Bells, you didn't have too." I said, feeling bad.

"I wanted too. Open it when I leave." She said, thrusting a small gift bag at me, white tissue paper flowing out of it. I smiled despite the intense butterflies in my stomach, and wrapped my arms around her. She did the same, burying her face in my chest. "I know you can do it." She said.

"I'm not so sure. I said.

"Stop that." She hugged me tighter. "Good luck, love you." She said, hurrying off to join her mother. I knew she had said it meaning in a friendship, like the way we signed cards and letters with 'love' or when we were laughing and joking, but it still struck something deep inside me.

"I love you too." I muttered as she pranced away, clutching the gift in my hands. I headed off backstage, and when I could get a moment alone, I opened it. I tore open the envelope on the card first, and read.

Edward,

You've worked so hard to get here. You deserve every moment, every praise, every compliment and every smile you get today.

Always remember that I'll be there for you no matter what, because that's what friends are for. You have been the greatest friend

anyone could ever ask for for seventeen years, and I know it will last until were old and wrinkly. I'm so proud of you, Masen.

Do your best, pretend like it's me you and your guitar alone in your room, and leave them speechless. Most important of all, look for me in the crowd.

I'll be the one going crazy. Don't forget me when you're famous,

Love, Bella.

I smiled, stroking her loopy handwriting with my thumb, and tucked it away in my back pocket, keeping it there for good luck. I opened the gift, and was shocked to see a shiny, new Ipod Touch roll into my hands. I had wanted one forever, but had never got around to it. I used my old walkman, seriously outdated, and really needed this for my next few years at Julliard. I grinned more as I saw the inscription on the back, "Edward and Bella, Best Friends Forever, 2010." Just like the monopoly board, and fought back the silly urge to cry. Brooke bustled in to the room, making all of us performers jump, and announced that it was time. Another jolt or nervousness fluttered through me, and I gulped, remembering the words Bella had said in her card.

RENEE POV

I followed Bella back to their hotel, still acutely aware of her scar. I tried to imagine the scenario and shuddered every time, thank god Edward had gotten there in time. We rode the elevator up and I got butterflies. How different would Edward be? He was 17 now, I reminded myself. Bella unlocked the door, and strode in, and then I saw him. He was tall, with good shoulders and a clearly muscular torso. His arms were also toned, and he was still pale. His peculiar green eyes gleamed from a slightly more structured face then the last time I had seen him, and his mop of bronze hair was still the same. I was lost in thought as I watched Bella hug Edward like it was the most natural thing in the world. Flash, Bella and Edward as three year olds splashing each other at the public pool, Flash, Edward and Bella pushing each other on the swings at age 5, Flash, them racing up and down the stairs, timing themselves, at age 11. I shook myself out of my thoughts.

"You aren't a little boy anymore, Edward." I said, and he chuckled.

"Nope." He said, and I was astounded at how low his voice had gotten. Still like velvet, smooth and sweet as it had always been.

"Congratulations on all this." I said sincerely, I really was proud of him, getting himself to Julliard and all.

"Thank you." He said, and we headed down for dinner.

Thanks "twigirl3" for the part about Renee calling her kids, I decided to add that in, just Bella wondering. Thanks everyone!

**Reviews? xox**


	18. Author's Note 3

**Hey everyone! I've realized I made a huge mistake (thanks to twigirl3). In the beginning of the story Edward is two years older than Bella meaning he was the same age as Em and Jasper, and should be 19, not 17. But that doesn't really work with the story, so I forgot and thought he was 17 like Bella. I think him being 17 does work better, because all of the memories I've wrote in, they are the same age and all. So please, please overlook my stupid mistake, I'm really sorry! Let's just say Edward is the same age as Bella, 17. He is at Julliard for the concert, but is still in grade 12. He will be actually attending when he is 18, the next year. I write these stories at like 1:00am, so I tend to get sleepy, sorry again for confusing anyone **** If you have any questions, feel free to review and ask away, I'd be glad to answer them.**

**-LunaCullen14**

**xox**


	19. Chapter 16 The Concert

Hey guys! This is it, the concert! Thank you all for being so patient, and amazing readers/reviewers! The first song Edward plays is called 'Remember To Breath' by Dashboard Confessional. The second is 'Gravity' by John Mayer, and the third is 'Lullaby' by The Spill Canvas. They are all FANTASTIC songs and I urge you to listen to them if you want the full effect of the story. This is the moment I have been imagining in my head forever! Feels so good to have it all down!

BELLA POV

I changed into the less formal dress Alice had packed me. It was a sort of boho style off-white dress, kind of like a loose shirt with a braided belt around my waist, but more flowy. It was lightweight and felt really nice. I pulled my hair up into another messy bun, curls escaping, and fastened the necklace from Edward around my neck again, slipping on some canvas flats. My mother was already dressed in a business suit, and she freshened up before heading down to the theater where the concert would be held. We filed in to the giant room full of soft chatter, and took our seats. I smiled in the dimly lit room, partly because I could feel the excitement mounting up inside me, and partly because Kyle was peeking from behind the curtains. We waited for the room to fill, not really talking. I flipped through the program, looking at all the different things we would see.

First was a performance from the dance students, a mix of jazz and classical ballet, and then some other solo dance acts. Then came the music. Edward Masen was written down third on the bulleted list, and I imagined him waiting behind stage, nervously pacing and grabbing his hair. I sent him a mental message to not freak out, laughing to myself. Edward and I used to pretend to be sending mental signals to each other across the classroom in elementary school. Suddenly, the room quieted down and the lights dimmed as Brooke stepped out onto the massive stage, now lit in an artistic way.

"Welcome." She said, smiling around at everyone. "Thank you for being here tonight. We hope you all enjoy the wonderful performances we have for you tonight, and we ask that you respect their hard work by turning off any electronics at this time. Please restrict yourselves to only clapping when a student finishes his or her performance, and if at any time you need to exit the theater, please use the doors at the back. Thank you." She finished, and everyone applauded heartily, ready for the show to start. The curtains closed momentarily and then opened again with a group of about 10 dancers arranged in elaborate positions. Their performance was certainly interesting, and it kept me watching their fantastic flexibilty and their fluid movements, but I was still waiting anxiously for Edward's performance. We sat through the solo dancers as well, and clapped appreciatively as they finished. Now, I was almost jumping up and down on my seat, and as Brooke announced the first music student, someone named Ross Day, I settled down in my seat. Ross Day performed three complicated songs on an electric keyboard, making an annoying techno noise. Though, when you thought about it it must be hard to make all those sounds mesh together and make a rhythm. Next was Kyle, Edward's friend, whose last name was Anderson, and I was curious to see what he would do. As the curtains opened again, I saw a grand piano, lighted beautifully. Kyle stepped up to the bench and took his seat, looking nervous. But when he started to play, I knew there was no reason he should have been. His playing was mesmerizing, smooth and almost tastable as the notes soared high in the air, lighting up the theater with waves of sound. The first song he played was called Piano Sonata No.5 by Mozart. The second was Nocturne in G Minor by Chopin, and it was my favourite. The third was his own creation, a beautiful mix of everything good, and I loved that one also. Everyone was perfectly silent as he finished his three, beautiful songs, and then applauded the loudest yet, some people couldn't restrain their screams and shouts of enjoyment. As they announced Edward's name, and closed the curtains, I sat up straighter, glancing over at my mother who looked equally excited, a huge smile on her face. They curtains opened again and there was Edward in a black dress shirt and white tie, his dark wash jeans ironed. All there was on the stage was a stool with Edward's favourite guitar resting against it, and a piano hidden in shadow. Brooke announced that Kyle would be playing minor accompaniments here and there to accent Edward's playing. His eyes searched the crowd as she spoke, and I smiled my widest smile as he found me. He smiled back, looking strained, and I gave him an encouraging look. As Brooke left the stage, he sat down on the stool and picked up his guitar. He took a deep breath and began to play. Now I had seen and heard Edward play his music in theaters before, but none so huge as this one, and the effect was momentous. It bounced off al the walls and made me feel like I was floating in warm air. There was just something about the way he strummed that guitar, that made everyone feel dreamy and content. I grinned again, I recognized the melody of this song. It was the one Edward had composed after his first concert of sorts in the local town hall, when we were 14. It was about us, how nervous he had been, what we wore, and what I said to him before he went on. It was simple, and yet described so much and conveyed so much feeling. As the opening guitar strumming finished, and he began to sing, I was mesmerized as usual.

"She fixes her lips they

Always look perfect

never a smudged line

never too much

I try on my blue shirt

she told me she liked it, once..."

I knew all the words to this song, and as my mother looked over, she knew what it was about, as I was mouthing the words. I looked up at him, the way he closed his eyes on the high notes and when he held long notes. The way his mouth formed the words perfectly, belting out the sounds with pure clarity, smooth as honey. The way his tongue caressed the end of each word like velvet.

"She wonders what I'll wear

she knows just what she'll wear

she always wears blue

so, sneakers or flip flops?

I'm starting to panic

remember she asked you

remember to breathe

and everything will be okay"

The song finished and the air trembled with the last note he had played. I clapped along with everyone else, standing up. As I watched people around me stood up as well, and I beamed at him until my mouth hurt, He beamed back just as hard and I broke the rules, letting myself scream heartily. The applause died down slowly along with other yells and shouts, and Edward bgean playing his next song. It was more slow, softer and kind of melancholy. I had never heard this one before. The notes made it sound like he was stuck in some sort of dilemma, and was wondering how to get out. I loved it, and the notes were slower as he began singing, his voice being the focus on this one.

"Gravity is working against me

And gravity wants to bring me down

Oh I'll never know what makes this man

With all the love that his heart can stand

Dream of ways to throw it all away

Oh Gravity is working against me

And gravity wants to bring me down

Oh twice as much ain't twice as good

And can't sustain like a one half could

It's wanting more

That's gonna send me to my knees..

Oh twice as much ain't twice as good

And can't sustain like a one half could

It's wanting more

That's gonna send me to my knees

Oh gravity, stay the hell away from me

And gravity has taken better men than me

Just keep me where the light is

Just keep me where the light is

Just keep me where the light is

C'mon keep me where the light is

C'mon keep me where the light is."

The song finished and I applauded again harder than I ever had in my life. He ran a hand through his hair and looked embarrassed, but also happy. I had loved that one, and I think it was one of my new favourites. The melody still stuck in my head as he sat down again and pulled the microphone towards him for his last song.

"This song is for my Best Friend in the Universe. Bella." He said, looking straight at me, and smiling a crooked smile. I took in a breath as he started to play. This was a new one, I had never heard it. Someone was playing the cello in the background, and it nearly brought tears to my eyes. Why had Edward never told me about it? I stopped wondering and just listened to the words he was singing.

"It's the way that you blush when you're nervous

It's your ability to make me earn this.

I know that you're tired,

Just let me sing you to sleep."

As he sang this first verse, there really was tears in my eyes, and I didn't bother wiping them away. This song was perfect. Absolutely perfect. It kept the room at an absolute standstill, everyone was staring at him. This described us in so many ways.

"It's about how you laugh out of pity

'Cause let's be honest, I'm not really that funny

I know that you're shy,

Just let me sing you to sleep.

If you need anything,

Just say the word, I mean anything.

Rest assured, if you start to doze

Then I'll tuck you in,

Plant my lips where your necklace is closed.

It's that nose that's buried in a book

Laughing at our own jokes, eating food that you cook

I know that you're spent,

Just let me sing you to sleep.

It's your finger, and how I'm wrapped around it

It's your grace, and how it keeps me grounded

I know that you're weak,

Just let me sing you to sleep.

If you need anything,

Just say the word, I mean anything.

Rest assured, if you start to doze

Then I'll tuck you in,

Plant my lips where your necklace is closed."

The tears were coming hard and fast now. This so special. I was shaking with something I had never known, like happiness and sadness and nostalgia at the same time. Edward was completely absorbed in his singing, his face angelic in concentration.

"While you were sleeping,

I figured out everything:

I was constructed for you,

And you were molded for me.

Now I feel your name.

Coursin' through my veins.

You shine so bright, it's insane.

You put the sun to shame."

The climax of the song was this, and my mother squeezed my knee. How had Edward managed to convey every single emotion we had ever felt in our whole lives with one song? How had he managed to make everyone else see it, everyone else believe it? How had he managed to share it and make it seem to real? These questions pulsed in my brain while Edward's playing cast a spell on the audience.

"If you need anything,

Just say the word, I mean anything. (I really do)

Rest assured, if you start to doze

Then I'll tuck you in,

Plant my lips where your necklace is closed.

If you need anything,

Just say the word, I mean anything.

Rest assured, if you start to doze

Then I'll tuck you in,

Plant my lips where your necklace is closed."

I burst out in more tears as the song ended, and everyone began clapping and shouting and yelling. I put a hand over my heart, and felt it beat hard and fast. I stood up, putting my hands together firmly over and over again. I felt standing wasn't enough, so I broke the rules farther and stood on my cushioned seat, clapping consistently. I was still crying as Edward spotted me. He beamed at me, looking me straight in the eyes. I tried to tell him with one look that he was brilliant, that he was perfect. I wanted to hug him right now, I needed too. I ran down the aisle and stood by the side of the stage, where the stairs were. People were looking at me, but I didn't care, and as Edward made his way down the stairs to meet me, I saw he had tears in his eyes too. I threw my arms around him, my face buried in his warm chest. He wrapped his arms around me as well, his head resting in the right place on top of my head, swaying us side to side. I squeezed him tighter than I ever had before, and whispered,

"Thank you." Before he released me, rushing backstage.

Don't worry. Edward will get up to courage to kiss her VERY VERY SOON. As in….SOON. Poor Bella doesn't even realize Edward is trying to tell her something with that song… I changed the lyrics in one of the verses of Lullaby cause it was about pills and it didn't fit haha…

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	20. Chapter 17 Kiss The Girl

**Finally. Edward got a backbone **** Enjoy everyone.**

EDWARD POV

I could see in Bella's eyes as she hugged me that she thought that song was just about our friendship. And in a way, it was true. But I had been trying to convey so much more to her, and hoping maybe I wouldn't have to tell her I loved her, maybe she would realize it herself. I didn't have time to dwell on it though, because I was swept up in organizations behind stage, helping other performers get ready. I was satisfied with how my performance had gone, and I was feeling extremely relieved that it was over. I kept telling myself I would have to get used to this sort of thing, but I knew it would take a while. When the show ended, and I was finally able to leave, I sought out Bella and Renee. I found them easily, waiting by the theater doors, and as soon as Bella saw me she was hugging me again.

"You we're amazing!" She cried. I smiled halfheartedly, patting her back.

"Thanks, beautiful." I said. She had tears in her eyes.

"That song was perfect. I don't even know what to say. I mean, it was so wonderful." She blubbered. "How come I never heard it before?" She asked.

"It was a surprise." I said, and she sighed.

"Well it was fantastic. I'm so proud of you." She said, kissing my temple as she always did. I closed my eyes as she did this, and breathed in. "Come on, let's go to dinner." She suggested. I agreed, and was about to follow her to the front exit when Renee cleared her throat.

"Bella can I talk to you?" She asked. I immediately got a bad feeling and gave her a wary look. She looked away from my eyes as Bella skipped happily away to talk with her. They made their way into a different hall and I sat down in the lobby, putting my head in my hands. A couple of attractive girls my age were giggling and looking at me, whispering things about the concert and Bella's song. I ignored them, so not in the mood. Renee came back around the corner in a moment, and barely glanced at me before leaving through the glass doors, walking quickly up the street and catching a cab. Bella then came back, and I saw that her eyes were red and puffy, though she was trying to hide it.

"Bella, what's the matter? What happened?" I asked. She shook her head, looking pissed off.

"Nothing, let's just go to dinner." She said shortly.

"Bells tell me. Please." I pleaded. She sniffled, and tried to look happy.

"Come on, it isn't important, let's celebrate your performance." She said.

"It is important." I said, following her out the door and once again ignoring the giggly girls, who were now staring at us. We were halfway down the street when I grabbed her shoulders and turned her around. She was obviously holding back tears, and when she couldn't stand it anymore, fell into me. She clutched my shirt tightly, and I held her close while she cried, sobs shaking her slender form.

"She never stays." She whispered quietly, and I stroked her soft hair, mentally cursing Renee.

BELLA POV

"What is it, mom?" I asked when she had pulled me around the corner.

"I have to go, Bella." She said shortly. I was confused.

"What? Why now?" I asked her.

"I can't be with you two anymore. I've missed too much, it's like I don't know you."

"Mom just-" I started to protest. But she cut me off.

"No, I'm a pathetic excuse for a mother. You're better off without me. I'm sorry I came here tonight with you." She insisted, and I hardened. I wasn't going to take any of this 'feel bad for me' shit. No, not again.

"You know, you're right. You don't know me because you abandoned our whole family with no explanation. I've seen you once since I was seven." I said bitterly.

"I'm sorry." She whispered.

"Didn't you want us?" I asked desperately, a question I had wanted to know since I was very little.

"Of course I did...I just-" She began.

"Just what? Couldn't handle it? Then maybe you should have thought before starting a family." I threw at her. She looked at me.

"Bella, you know I love you. You're my daughter, how can I not? And Emmett too, he's my baby boy. But I did think before starting a family. It all just sort of happened, it was never what I wanted."

"So you're saying you can love someone and not want them?" I asked, angry now.

"Well, that's not what I'm-" She started to say, looking helpless.

"Mom, maybe you're right. Maybe we are better off without you, please just go." I said quietly, and she just looked at me. She looked at me for a long time, and then turned on her heel and left. I burst out in uncontrollable tears now, and tried to stifle them this was Edward's night, not mine. I didn't want him to see me like this. I wanted to give him all my attention. And so I gathered myself, getting that horrible tight feeling when you're holding in tears, and wiped my eyes. I took a deep breath, and walked out.

"Bella, what's the matter? What happened?" Edward asked me as soon as he saw me. Of course he would notice, had I been so stupid as to think he wouldn't? There were a couple girls our age staring at me, whispering my name and Edward's. I was guessing they had heard his song for me.

"Nothing, let's just go to dinner." I said with unavoidable anger in my voice. I hated her, I hated my own mother. She always did this.

"Bells tell me. Please." He pleaded. I sniffled, and tried to look happier and convincing.

"Come on, it isn't important, let's celebrate your performance." I said, walking out the door. But of course, he insisted.

"It is important." He said. I kept walking, but halfway down the dark street felt his cool hands on my shoulders. He turned me around to face him, and I looked at him. The comforting words of his song came flowing through my brain, and I couldn't hold it in any longer. I burst out in tears and he was there to catch me, as he always was. I felt bad, but couldn't stop crying. I clutched him on instinct and he held me tightly, making me feel safe.

"She never stays." I whispered to him. He stroked down my hair over and over again, telling me it was all right.

EDWARD POV

I looked down at her sleeping form, her tear streaked face peaceful in dreams. She was clutching me tightly, dressed in an over large shirt and sweatpants. She was so warm next to me, it almost killed me. It was so familiar, so comforting, so necessary, but also unbearable. I wanted her to know I loved her. To the moon and back. When we had gotten back up to the hotel room after deciding not to go to dinner, she had suddenly become extremely tired, saying the days events had washed her out. She had apologized profusely for taking up the time that should be focused on me, the time we should have spent celebrating my success. But I honestly couldn't care less, and as we lay here before she fell asleep, I had seen the tiny, frail, innocent seven-year-old Bella from 10 years ago. The seven-year-old Bella whose mother had left her, who barely ate, who didn't like to watch movies or listen to music. The seven-year-old Bella with big empty eyes. The little Bella I had eventually coaxed out of depression, and set back on her feet.

I got out of the bed, disentangling myself from Bella, and sitting down on the chair. I watched her sleep, her even breathing and angel face. I sat there for a while, turning my new Ipod over and over in my hands, tracing the inscription on the back, and rereading her card. I was in the process of reading it for the third time when I heard her stir, I looked at the clock, it was 3 in the morning.

"Edward?" She called out quietly, getting up quickly. She turned around in a circle in the dark.

"I'm right here, beautiful." I said, reassuring her and standing up to meet her in the middle of the room. Her eyes were welling up with tears again. "I'm right here." I whispered, standing close. She looked up at me with those brown eyes, and I lost it. I don't know if it was the left over adrenaline from the show, or the urge to make her feel better, or if it was just that she was wearing my shirt, but all of my urges over came me right there, and I was helpless. I slipped a hand around her neck gently, and when she didn't pull away, brought myself closer. I took one shaky breath before doing what I had dreamt of doing for a while now. Her lips were soft on mine as I pressed mine down on them. She didn't protest, and I took that as a good sign. I pressed my body against hers, and it only intensified the moment. I placed one hand on the small of her back, around her waist, and continued, lost in my own head. It was perfect, our lips moving in precision with each other's, which wasn't surprising, since every other part of us was in sync. She smelled so amazing, like strawberries and a faint hint of freesia. I almost groaned as she moved hesitantly and placed her arms around my neck lightly. I felt her respond finally, kissing me back, and I think I might have died as she ran a gentle hand through my hair.

BELLA POV

"I'm right here, beautiful." He said, and I turned to find the voice. He was sitting in the chair, but stood up immediately, coming towards me. "I'm right here." He whispered, now standing very close. He slipped a hand around my neck, cupping it gently. He pulled himself even closer, and now I could feel his breath as he drew a shaky one in. I had no time to do anything before he pressed his lips to mine. I wasn't quite sure how to react, but ironically, the first thing that ran through my head was "Damn, he's a good kisser." And it was true. His lips were like velvet, smooth and perfect, moving as if in a dance with mine. He tasted like the sun and toothpaste, and smelled like his clean laundry and cologne. He moved an arm around my waist and pulled me that much closer. Now every part of our bodies were connected. It was so oddly familiar, yet so new. This was the same Edward I had cuddled up with countless times, the same strong chest and long arms. But this was different, as if I was seeing him in a new light. His kiss was so different than Carlos' had been, or any other guy I had ever kissed. It was so natural and easy as breathing. I still wasn't sure what was happening, but my brain had gone fuzzy, and I let myself place my arms around his neck. I returned his pressure, and he shivered as I ran a hand through his hair. I hesitated for a moment before parting my lips just slightly, and letting myself get lost in confusion and happiness.

**WOW. So what happens next? I'll try to update soon! I imagined 'Secrets' by OneRepublic as the soundtrack to this chapter…just sayin.**

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	21. Chapter 18 More?

Hey guys. You are all gonna hate me for this. Don't worry, it's been part of my plan for a while, I know exactly how it's gonna end. It won't last long at all Keep reading! Thank you!

EDWARD POV

I woke up with a warm feeling in my stomach, remembering the kiss I had shared with Bella last night. She hadn't said anything after it, just sort of giggled and then fainted. At first I was worried, but then she woke up, insisting she was fine, and then fell back asleep. My arm was tucked around her now, and I smiled once more, kissing her nose, before falling peacefully back asleep, happier than I had ever been.

BELLA POV

I felt Edward's arm around me, and his even breathing and dared to open my eyes. I had been awake for a while, but refused to believe the image that was flooding slowly back into my memory. I had kissed my best friend last night. The thing that scared me was that I hadn't resisted against him, quite the contrary. If anything, I had responded. What had I been thinking? Of course, I had been sad and feeling lonely. He was there, he was always there. And he was an amazing kisser, as weird as that was. But still, I had been tired and obviously didn't know what I was doing. Obviously, neither had he. But my thoughts about this were interrupted when he wrapped his arm tighter around me, and sighed.

"Beautiful Bella is awake." He said, his sweet breath washing over me. I was stiff in his arms. What did I do? I gave him false assumptions, and now he thought we were more than friends. I sat up slowly, and he looked confused. "We don't have anywhere to be." He smiled.

"I'm sorry about last night." I said quietly, and he cocked his head to the side.

"Sorry?" He asked. I nodded. "Why?"

"Edward, I have to go." I said quickly.

"What? Where?" He asked.

"Pee." I said, making this up on the spot. He laughed.

"Oh." He said, releasing me. I stood up quickly and put a sweater on over the shirt of his I was wearing with sweatpants. Now what? "Bella, is something wrong?" He asked me. Oh god, I thought as the covers fell off him. He was shirtless, the perfectly sculpted abs he didn't have to work for obvious. Of course I had seen him like this before but it was weird after what had happened last night.

"Umm, no?"

"Bella, tell me." He said in that reassuring tone.

"I didn't mean to confuse you last night." I said flatly.

"What?" He asked.

"I have to go." I said, once again, just grabbing my cell phone, not caring about my suitcase, and taking one last look at him before running out the door. I heard him calling after me, but I rushed down in the elevator and breathed a sigh as I got outside and hurried around a corner. He thought we were more. I was sure of it. What had happened last night? Why had I succumbed to my loneliness and his kissing expertise. I dialed Alice quickly, holding back tears. God, these past few weeks, I wasn't sure how many tears I had cried, but they must run dry sometime.

"Bella?" She picked up.

"Alice. I'm coming home early." I choked.

"Bella, I'm already here." She said.

"Wait, what?" I asked.

"I had sort of a premonition if you will. I knew something would happen."

"Premonition? Alice don't be insane."

"I'm not! Okay maybe it wasn't like a vision, but I had this feeling." She said, chuckling.

"Where are you?" I asked her urgently.

"I'm at my motel. It's two streets down from your hotel." She said. My stomach floated back to where it was supposed to be, knowing I wouldn't have to trek all over New York, before sinking back down at the thought of Edward. "It's called SunnyView." She told me.

"Kay." I said, hanging up and starting to walk. I got there shortly, and Alice opened the door for me, ushering me in. At the sight of her face, so comforting and familiar, yet resembling Edward's slightly, I couldn't hold back the sobs anymore. Alice rubbed my back as I sat on the bed and told her the story of what had happened.

"And now our friendship will never be normal again, how can it?" I asked, sniffling.

"I think it will work out." She said, hugging me. I wasn't convinced, but I let her make me tea, and then fell asleep for the rest of the day.

EDWARD POV

I had called after her, and even went down to the front, but she was gone. I went back upstairs, sitting on the bed. I ran a hand through my hair. What had I done? By giving into my urges I had ruined our lifelong friendship. No wonder Bella was startled. She had just broken up with her boyfriend, and her best friend who has never had feelings for her decides to kiss her. I felt bad just thinking about it. I groaned, calling her cell. She didn't pick up. A lump rose in my throat at the sound of her cheery voice on the answering machine, and I pushed it back down, ashamed. I flopped down on my back, and let out a long breath. Before long, I found myself thinking about that kiss last night. Better than I ever could have imagined, but somehow ruining everything.

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	22. Chapter 19 Day One

**Hey guys! I'm going away to camp from the 22nd to the 27th, so don't expect any updates after this one! I won't be able to write until I get back, but I assure you that I will. I'm sorry! Thanks for reading.**

DAY 1  
BELLA POV  
I woke up at about 5 in the morning, taking a minute to realize where I was. I was in Alice's motel room, the comforter wrapped around me, stealing it from Alice. I rolled out of the bed and put on Edward's sweatshirt I had been wearing yesterday. I left Alice snoring loudly, and made my way to kitchen to make hot chocolate. There was a dull ache in my stomach, something weird that wouldn't go away. I felt bad that I couldn't give Edward what he wanted, and that I had left without explanation. I felt scared of what would happen to our friendship now. At about seven, when Alice had woken, and we were sitting quietly on the couch watching TV, my phone rang shrilly. Seeing that it wasn't Edward, I picked up quickly.  
"Hello?"  
"Is this Isabella Swan?" The voice said.  
"Yes." I said, confused.  
"This is the Four Seasons, we have it on our records that you were staying with Mr. Masen, am I right?" He asked. I gulped.  
"Yes, why?"  
"Would you by any chance know where he is?" They asked politely. I felt a weight sinking to the pit of my stomach,  
"No." I whispered. "Is he not there? That's where I saw him last." I told the man on the phone. He sighed, thanking me and hanging up. Apparently Edward had checked out a day early, and they needed to contact him. I told Alice this, and she looked worried as well, though I'm sure he was only going home. He was probably on a plane right now. But minutes later, I got another phone call. This time it was Brooke's voice that shouted at me over the receiver. She sounded panicked, stressed out beyond belief.  
"Bella!" She yelled. "Where's Edward?" She asked me.  
"I don't know." I told her honestly, a worried feeling settling in.  
"Is he with you?" She asked.  
"No, I just said I don't know." I said.  
"Well no one can find him or get in touch with him, and he has another presentation dinner tonight. There are talent agents with us!" She nearly shrieked.  
"If I get word of him, I'll tell you." I said, and she thanked me quickly before hanging up. I turned to Alice, who had turned down the TV. She looked at me expectantly.  
"No one knows where he is." I said quietly.  
"Calm down Bells, he's probably on his way home now." She said soothingly. I tried to tell myself this, but I just had this feeling that Edward wouldn't do that. Besides, he had my suitcase with him. "We'll call my mom later and see if he's there."

EDWARD POV  
I had left last night on impulse, not caring about the dinner or anything else but to get away. Now, I woke up in a dinghy motel room all the way across town. There was a low buzz coming from the old refrigerator, and as I opened it restlessly, it just got louder. I sighed, getting dressed. I looked again at the text Alice had sent me the night before, running a hand across my hair.

If you get the urge to come and maybe apologize or work this out with her, we are at the Sunny View Motel a couple streets down from your hotel.

Why Alice was in New York, I couldn't fathom. But you never know with Alice, she probably claimed she had some sort of vision. I hauled my suitcase and Bella's, which I had taken from the hotel with me, down to the front desk of this motel, and checked out. I climbed into a cab that was waiting restlessly in the parking lot, and directed him to Bella and Alice's motel. When we got there, I dropped Bella's suitcase of at the front desk, telling them who it was for. I climbed back into the cab with a pang of regret in my stomach. Bella probably didn't want to see me. I told the cab driver to drive me all the way to New Jersey, and settled back in my seat, flipping my new Ipod over and over in my hands, it's shin silver back reflecting my face.

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	23. Chapter 20 Day Two

**Hey guys! Sorry for the gap between updates!**

**Love you all!**

DAY 2  
BELLA POV  
I woke up at about 8 in the morning with an anxious feeling in the pit of my stomach. We had called Carlisle and Esme last night, and they had said that he definitely wasn't there. No one knew where Edward was, no one was in contact with him. It freaked me out intensely, since I had known where he was and what he was doing every day for as long as I could remember. It was very strange not being in contact. Even when one of us had gone on vacation or something, we had still called each other every night. I rolled over restlessly in the lumpy motel bed, accidentally elbowing Alice and making her cry out in pain. She mumbled a curse, and then opened her eyes.  
"Sorry." I whispered.  
"It's fine." She said in a strained voice, rubbing her rib. I sat up and curled my knees up to my chest. Before long, as Alice fell back asleep, I found myself thinking about that kiss. The biggest emotion floating around in my chest as I thought was confusion. Why had he done it? Why hadn't I stopped him? Why didn't I know how I felt about it? We had always been so comfortable around each other, that his hands on my waist felt natural. I didn't hesitate as someone usually would when they placed their arms around someone else's shoulders. With us it just flowed, and so of course that kiss had been like that also. That was what worried me the most, how in that moment no one had questioned anything, there were no awkward movements, it just seemed right. But he was my best friend. He was the one who was supposed to be like my brother, I had grown up with him, shared everything with him.  
I stood up and pulled one of the thin motel robes around me, walking uselessly around the room. There was this nagging worry at the bottom of my stomach, where could he be? Just then, I spotted a peek of sunshine through the window, so I walked over to the door and threw it open, stepping outside and closing it behind me. I sighed, enjoying the partial warmth on my face, before a dark shape in the corner of my eye caused me to look down. It was my suitcase from the trip. My first thought was relieved, I had been wearing the same clothes for a while now. And then it hit me, Edward must have brought this. Edward had been here. The time on the little paper slip hanging from the doorknob said that it had been yesterday at about 5pm yesterday. Why hadn't he knocked? Why hadn't he told me where he was going? Didn't he know that nothing could make me mad enough to not want to talk to him, not want to see him. We could work anything out. He should know that by now. He should know what this tearing away was doing to me.

EDWARD POV  
I woke up at noon, feeling rested. I had asked the taxi driver last night to drop me off at another sleazy hotel as we reached New Jersey. I had enough money to stay for another couple of nights. As I dropped my suitcase on the floor and flipped through the channels on the small TV, a thought popped into my head. Why was I running away? I couldn't exactly answer my own question. It felt like I needed too, like some force was telling me to move away from where Bella was, telling me to give her space. I felt like she wouldn't want to see me. I felt as though in kissing her, I had broken something between us, like something could never be the same. At the same time, there was that inexplicable gravitational pull I had always felt for Bella pulsing inside of me. The same pull that had kept us in perfect synchronization for our whole lives. It was like an invisible string tied to each of our belly buttons. And let me tell you, that string hated to be stretched.  
I ordered room service and made myself scarf down a sandwich before buttoning up my jacket and heading outside for some fresh air. It was unusually sunny, but still chilly. I walked down the road for a couple blocks, sitting myself on a bench and sighing. There seemed like there was nothing to do. My consciousness alerted me that tonight was supposed to be our flight home back to Forks, and I wondered if Bells would be on the plane. I knew that I wouldn't be, and I felt terrible. Knowing her, she would be freaking out, wondering what had happened to me. Or maybe she didn't want to see me, and would be glad that I wasn't going home with her. I dreaded our invisible string being stretched even farther, and wondered vaguely how long I could stay in New Jersey before returning home.

ALICE POV  
The day had passed slowly, with me trying to get Bella to eat something, go for a walk with me, see some sights. But she had refused all of my requests. I had just managed to get her out of the motel and into a taxi to the airport, when she began to cry again.  
"Alice, I'm so worried." She told me through tears. Edward had been refusing to answer both her and my calls and texts. He wouldn't answer my parents, or Jasper or Emmett. Even Rosalie had tried calling him. I couldn't fool myself, of course I was worried about my brother, but I had confidence he could take care of himself.  
"Bella, he's a big boy. He'll be alright." I assured her.  
"But what if he does something drastic?" She asked me. I patted her shoulder gently, and she leaned into me.  
"We'll find him." I said quietly. I couldn't blame her for being so worried, the two of them were like one person split into two bodies.

**I know these are short, but I'm doing them in day form. Next one will be up soon! Thanks for reading! Reviews?**

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	24. Chapter 21 Letter

**HEY EVERYONE! So I've been imagining this chapter for a while, mostly just the last bit. I dunno if it's just me, but when I write I like to listen to music, because the lyrics and the melody give me images in my head of what I want it to look like. As I was writing this chapter and the last few before it, I was listening to Heartbreak Warfare by John Mayer and Sparks by Coldplay. They are two really good songs! Go listen to them and see if you agree with me, they totally fit with the mood going on in the story right now.**

**Thanks!**

DAY 3  
BELLA POV  
I woke up in my own bed, after our flight last night, and groaned. I sat up and automatically called Edward's cell. There was no answer of course, and I fell back against my pillows, that nagging worry again in my stomach, making it hard for me to fall asleep again.  
DAY 4  
"Bella come on, you've been asleep for two whole days now." I heard Emmett's voice from my doorway, and then the creaking as he sat down on my bed. I grunted in response. He set a cup of tea on my bedside table, which made my throat close up. Emmett was sometimes just the brother from heaven. I sat up and wrapped my arms around him. He did the same, holding me tight, and I let myself cry on his shoulder. He didn't pull away, just sat securely beside me, rubbing my back.  
"You're the best brother ever, Em. Thanks." I told him, sniffling and picking up the tea and sipping it cautiously. He just smiled.  
"No problem, Bells." He said, standing up and leaving the room.  
A WEEK LATER  
If I had been upset before, now I was insane. I had never been away from Edward with no contact for this long. I'm always wondering if he'll return. I've been wishing on everything I can that he will. Absence isn't solid the way death is. It isn't solid because you know that somewhere out there, the person you miss is doing something without you. Maybe he isn't even thinking about you. It's more fluid, like language. And it hurts so much.. so, so much. I had begun to get up in the morning and go to school, but I retained nothing from my classes. The empty seat beside me was too much of a reminder that Edward was avoiding me. Without him, nothing I enjoyed before was the same, not reading Wuthering Heights, not that the leaves are finally all orange and crunchy now, not the stacks of uncracked books in the bookstore Jasper and Emmett had dragged me too in hopes of lifting my mood. I felt sort of hollow, like something is missing. Touching him had always been important to me. It was something I lived for. Little, nothing touches. My fingers against his shoulder. The outsides of our thighs touching as we squeezed together on the bus or in the back of someones car. I couldn't explain it, but I needed it. And now that I didn't have it, the realization of how much I depended on it hit me.  
We had considered filing a missing person's add, and telling the police we couldn't contact him. But Charlie, as chief of police, had said that with situations like this, you couldn't do much. He hadn't been abducted, he was just not answering his phone. And he was almost an adult who could handle himself, not a child anymore. I hated the way my parents and his parents discussed it, like it was no big deal. Of course, his mother was anxious, and his father was angry that he wouldn't talk to anyone, but they dismissed it, telling each other he would show up.  
I suspected Alice had told everyone about what had happened between Edward and I, because no one was questioning it. I had told Rosalie myself, but I got the impression that everyone else knew. I didn't know whether to be mad with Alice for gossiping, or glad that I wasn't the one who had to tell everyone.

EDWARD POV

My temporary home was with Kyle's family, who lived in the residential area of New Jersey. In the short time I had been staying with them, I had learned three things. One, their parents were never around. Two, Kira was a child genius, and three, Kyle loved her to death. I woke up every morning and ate breakfast with them and then hung out by myself while Kyle and Kira were at school. Kyle was being a really good friend to me, by not asking intrusive questions and telling me I could stay as long as I needed too. I was truly grateful to them, and treated them to a dinner out one night, spending the last of my money.  
It was the 15th day since the kiss, and all of my worry and emotions were settling down into a boiling pit at the bottom of my stomach. More than anything, I missed my best friend. It was weird not having her around, and it suddenly struck me that if I kept avoiding her like this, I would feel like this forever. I needed her so badly. A pad of stationary sitting on the counter of Kyle's kitchen caught my eye, and I automatically made my way over, pulling the paper towards me and grabbing a blue pen. Without knowing what I was doing, my fingers wrote Bella's name on the page, and soon, I was filling the lines with all I had been wanting to say the past few months.

Bella,  
I know you're probably pretty pissed off. And I take complete responsibility. I'm an idiot. I know I was wrong to kiss you like that. But I love you. Not in just a friendly way. I mean I'm seriously and actually in love with you. I think I have been for a long time, I just didn't want anything to get in the way of our friendship, because I value it and you more than anything in the world. Life is better by your side, beautiful. I know this is probably weird, being best friends and all, and I'm really really sorry. I just can't get it out of my head. Isn't this love though? When you notice someone's absence and hate that absence more than anything? More, even, than you love her presence? It's like I've been torn away from a part of me. I really, really miss you. I miss talking to you, knowing that you get me. And everytime I talk to someone else, it just reminds me of how much they don't. We fit together, Bells. We always have. I understand if you don't like me that way, and I will always respect your wishes and what you want. I don't want you to be unhappy or confused or conflicted. Follow your own heart and do whatever you feel you need to do. Don't try to make anyone else happy, start with yourself. Whatever you choose, it's okay with me. But I promise you this, I'll always look out for you. I'll never stop being your best friend, or whatever you need me to be.  
I just want you to know, that when I say I love you, I mean it with every bit of my body, with every hair on my skin, with every cell making me up, with every breath I take. When I say I love you, I mean I love you with every bad mood you're in, every tear you shed, with every sad story from your past. When I say I love you, I mean I love you with every smile you put on my face, with every laugh I tickle out of you, with every dream you tell me, with every hug you wrap me into, with every touch of you against my skin, with every falling asleep and waking up next to you. When I say I love you, I mean it with every fibre my body is made up of, with every molecule I consist of. When I say I love you, I mean it.  
My heart is yours  
-Edward

I found an envelope and a stamp, and before I could change my mind, I wrote down Bella's address and threw it into the mailbox down the street. I sighed, wondering what she was doing right now.

**Thank you! I want to point out that I used a couple of quotes in Edward's letter that weren't mine. I got them from s we e t e s t s i n – o x . x a n g a . c o m , one of my favourite sites for quotes and writing inspiration. Check it out! **

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	25. Chapter 22 Realization

**WOOOOOO this chapter felt so good to write :) Hope you like it!**

BELLA POV  
A couple days later, Edward still hadn't contacted any of us, and the nagging worry was now a weight in my stomach, permanently sitting there. I drove home from school in my truck, rumbling my way along the streets. The weather was getting slightly warmer now, spring was on it's way. I parked and walked up the driveway slowly, purposely stepping on a few crunchy leaves. When I got the the door, I picked up the mail resting on the front step and went inside. I sorted through it, leaving bills and letters for Charlie on the kitchen counter. To my surprise, the last letter in the pile was addressed to me, with a New Jersey address on it. My heart gave a leap, and I sat down at the table, dropping my school bag beside me. I tore open the envelope and unfolded the letter, which was written on a plain piece of stationary. I almost cried out as I recognized Edward's familiar neat and tidy writing, and my eyes began to scan the page.

Bella,  
I know you're probably pretty pissed off. And I take complete responsibility. I'm an idiot. I know I was wrong to kiss you like that. But I love you. Not in just a friendly way. I mean I'm seriously and actually in love with you. I think I have been for a long time, I just didn't want anything to get in the way of our friendship, because I value it and you more than anything in the world. Life is better by your side, beautiful. I know this is probably weird, being best friends and all, and I'm really really sorry. I just can't get it out of my head. Isn't this love though? When you notice someone's absence and hate that absence more than anything? More, even, than you love her presence? It's like I've been torn away from a part of me. I really, really miss you. I miss talking to you, knowing that you get me. And everytime I talk to someone else, it just reminds me of how much they don't. We fit together, Bells. We always have. I understand if you don't like me that way, and I will always respect your wishes and what you want. I don't want you to be unhappy or confused or conflicted. Follow your own heart and do whatever you feel you need to do. Don't try to make anyone else happy, start with yourself. Whatever you choose, it's okay with me. But I promise you this, I'll always look out for you. I'll never stop being your best friend, or whatever you need me to be.  
I just want you to know, that when I say I love you, I mean it with every bit of my body, with every hair on my skin, with every cell making me up, with every breath I take. When I say I love you, I mean I love you with every bad mood you're in, every tear you shed, with every sad story from your past. When I say I love you, I mean I love you with every smile you put on my face, with every laugh I tickle out of you, with every dream you tell me, with every hug you wrap me into, with every touch of you against my skin, with every falling asleep and waking up next to you. When I say I love you, I mean it with every fibre my body is made up of, with every molecule I consist of. When I say I love you, I mean it.  
My heart is yours  
-Edward

I finished reading and my throat was swollen and thick. I told myself I wouldn't cry though, I was just so sick and tired of crying by now. I was feeling a million emotions at once. Relief was first. Edward was safe, he was in New Jersey, with access to stationary paper, obviously. He had finally contacted me, finally I had gotten some word and some assurance as to if my best friend was alright. Next was understanding, Carlos had been right. Edward was in love with me, which was such a weird concept that I just couldn't grasp it. It didn't make sense in my brain. And then there was the longing. I didn't care if Edward loved me that way or not, I wanted him back where he belonged, he needed to come home. We could work out whatever came our way. We always had, and nothing could change it. With a renewed sense of determination, I called Edward's number again and again, with no answer. I called Alice and Rosalie, and they said they would be at my house in a couple of minutes. I re-read the letter over and over again. And then suddenly, I felt another emotion. Pity. I felt so bad for my best friend. He had been feeling this way about me for a while, and he hadn't been able to tell me. We had always told each other everything, no matter what. But this was something that he couldn't speak to me about. He must have felt encased and trapped. He must have wanted to tell me so badly, and I wished he had. I wasn't angry. I wasn't upset or confused. I just wanted to see him, I just wanted to work this out. A knock on the door called me to my feet, and I let Alice and Rose in, and they looked worried. But my face was composed and I even smiled as they walked in. I was surprisingly calm and unbothered. I showed them the letter and Rosalie let out a cry.  
"I knew all along!" She screamed, chuckling. Alice nodded.  
"I thought so as well." She said. I tried to understand how I had missed all the signs.  
"Well, think about it Bella. You already act like more than best friends, but that's only because of how close you are. Some people even think you're dating, remember? So the changes in Edward's behaviour would be so subtle you probably wouldn't even notice them." Rosalie said. I noted that this was probably true. We talked about this for a while more, seated on my bed, before Alice asked the question I had been avoiding asking myself.  
"Bella, do you love him?" She asked, and the room was quiet. Of course I did, I had loved him all my life. But I knew she meant in a different way.  
"No!" I protested. She gave me a look.  
"Bella, don't be stubborn. No one is going to judge you here, I want you to seriously think about it, not automatically deny it." Alice said sternly. She was right, this was serious and needed to be thought about carefully. It was quiet as I thought. Edward was always inexplicably there for me when I needed him. He was always the one thing I could depend on, no matter what. He is my other half, he's myself reflected into someone else, but at the same time so radically different. And then, with a flooding sort of feeling, it came to me. Of course I love him in that way. I had been so stupid, refusing to let my mind open up to other things in life, chasing after Carlos and boys I hardly knew, when there was the only one who would always understand me, one who would never leave, standing beside me my whole life.  
I asked myself why, and in that same breath, as I looked around my room at the various pictures of Edward and I at different periods in our life, I got my answer. It's everything about him; it's that teasing smile, that warm scent he's always had. It's the curve of his arms and the shape of his shoulders, the tousle of his hair, the familiar ring of his voice. It's just everything about him. But more than that, it's everything about me. It's everything about the way he makes me laugh, cry, smile and hurt. It's everything about the way he's always been able to make me feel. And that's everything that I cannot, and would not, want to let go off, ever. And then, as I thought this, and my stomach churned wildly, but not in a bad way, I realized that that's why the kiss had felt so right. Because there had always been that little bit more that we could give hiding in the corner of our brains, that little tiny change in our relationship that would make all the difference. And once we let it go, it was perfect. We were meant to be like that.  
Tears were now coming down my face, but not of sadness. They were tears or everything. Tears of joy in understanding, the confusion finally leaving me. Tears of relief and longing.  
"I love him more than the world." I said, and Rosalie and Alice smiled as if a giant weight had just been lifted off them.  
"We know. It's okay." They comforted me and relished in my new realization for a while before the tears finally stopped and I was able to make coherent sentences again. I picked up my phone one last time and dialed his number, and as if by some miracle, some unearthly force of nature, he picked up for the first time in almost 17 days.  
"Bella." He said into the phone, and automatically my throat closed up again. It was like the sky was raining gold, hearing his voice again.  
"Come home now." I choked out. "Please."  
"I'm on my way, beautiful." He said like he always had, and even though I knew he was miles away, I felt like he was here again. I felt warm and safe, happy for the first time in a while.****

**Aww Bella... :) **

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	26. Chapter 23 Look Outside

**Hey everyone :) I'm updating as fast as I can! I'm relatively happy with this chapter..**

**hope you like!**

I don't think that passenger seat  
Has ever looked this good to me  
He tells me about his night  
And I count the colours in his eyes  
That I know all his favourite songs and  
Doesn't he know I've had him memorized for so long?  
He sees everything black and white  
Never let nobody see him cry  
I could tell you his favourite colours green  
He loves to argue, born on the seventeenth  
His sister's beautiful, he has his father's eyes  
I'm holding every breathe for you  
He'd never tell you but he can play guitar  
First thought when I wake up is, "My god, he's beautiful"  
-Taylor Swift

EDWARD POV  
My plane seat was uncomfortable, and my stomach was churning too much too eat the crappy food. I wasn't interested in the pretty stewardess flirting with me, and my nerves were incredible. Over all, the worst plane ride I had ever endured. Kyle had graciously payed for my ticket, me having spent the last of my money on their dinner out. I was eternally grateful to him, and offered for him and Kira to come stay in Forks with my family whenever they wanted. I ran a hand through my hair, and groaned. I was so nervous it was incredible. Bella had obviously gotten my letter, and I didn't know what had compelled me to pick up the phone that time out of the millions everyone had called. But as soon as I heard her voice, there was no turning back, I needed to go home. What would she think of what i had said in the letter? Would she be mad? Upset? I nervously tapped out a melody with my feet on the carpeted floors of the plane, and the elderly woman beside me gave me a strange look. I stopped immediately, apologizing and reading the National Geographic magazine the pretty stewardess had given me for free. There was some article about penguins, and then an African tribe, and then something about different types of professional cameras. I wasn't really paying attention, but I read the whole thing back to front to pass the time. When the seat belt lights flashed on, and the pilots announced that we would be landing soon, I felt another jolt in my stomach. Bella didn't know exactly what time I was coming, so no one was meeting me at the airport. I decided to take a taxi to my house, and then drive my car over to Bella's. When I got home, I fought the urge to go inside and hug my whole family easily, it was intensely overpowered by the urge to see Bella. The dark night air was somewhat soothing and quiet, and as I climbed into my Volvo I sighed, running my hands over the dashboard before starting the engine. By the looks of my house, nobody was home, and no one would see my car mysteriously disappear from the driveway. I drove the familiar streets with a sense of home, nerves wriggling in my stomach. But I convinced myself I was being silly, this was Bella I was talking about. My best friend ever. Stop being nervous.  
I pulled up outside her house, and the lights were on inside. I imagined Emmett watching sports network on TV. I imagined Charlie tinkering with his fishing rod at the kitchen table, and lastly, I imagined Bella curled up with her knees to her chest, reading Wuthering Heights. I debated for a while how I should do this, before just deciding to send her a text.  
Look outside -E. I sent quickly. I waited anxiously, and saw her face peer through her curtains. My heart gave a lurch as her eyes widened and she hurried away from the window.

BELLA POV  
I was trying to read, but I was too hyperactive. I knew Edward would be here soon. Maybe tomorrow. And all day I had been bouncing off the walls, unable to focus on one thing at a time. Since my realization, I had been more eager to see him than I ever had in my life. I wanted to wrap my arms around him just be there forever. The words of my book seemed to be melting off the page and I gave up, setting it down. I fiddled with the necklace Edward had given me, which had been around my neck since New York, and was grateful when my phone buzzed, having something to take my mind off things. But it did exactly the opposite.  
Look outside -E. The text said. I was frozen in my spot for what seemed like an eternity before coming to my senses and jumping up and peeking through my curtains. Sure enough, his car was parked and silent in front of my house. I jumped away from the window and changed out of the pyjama shorts I had been wearing and into some lululemon pants laying on my floor. I put on a soft plain white t-shirt and pulled the necklace out on top of it. I quickly ran down the stairs and put on Emmett's jean jacket and my suede boots without an explication to Charlie, who was at the kitchen table fixing his favourite rod, and threw open the door, running and tripping down the stairs. I saw him get out of the car and come around to meet me. He stood against his car and I literally threw myself at him, collapsing into his chest. His arms wrapped around me, and it as like he was never gone. New tears of happiness flooded out of my eyes and I gripped him so tight my knuckles went white. He buried his face in my hair, and held me tighter.  
"I'm so sorry, beautiful." He choked out, and his voice sounded tight like he could have cried as well. I didn't say anything, just let my had rest on his chest and took shaky breaths. Without saying anything, he released me and opened the car door. I climbed in gratefully, and he turned the heat up. I looked up at him, and really took in the familiar face since he had arrived. His green eyes were just as brilliant, his hair just as messy, everything just the same, but I ran my eyes over him again and gain, memorizing him anew. He breathed a sigh, and began to talk.  
"Don't. Just drive." I said calmly and he nodded.

EDWARD POV  
Bella came running and tripping down the stairs in an oversized jean jacket with the sleeves rolled up, black pants, a white shirt and suede boots. As she got closer, I saw the necklace I had bought her for her birthday bouncing on her neck. It felt so good to have her slender form in my arms again, that I almost cried as her strawberry scent washed over me. She was sobbing, but smiling, and her grip on me was tighter than ever before.  
"I'm sorry beautiful." I said, and she didn't say anything. I opened the car door for her and the climbed in the drivers side. I started to say something, but she looked at me and said,  
"Don't. Just drive." She said calmly and I obeyed, the silence just felt right at the moment. I drove for a while, before we reached La Push, and I parked near the beach. She hopped out as soon as the car stopped. I did the same, and we walked down to the beach without exchanging any words. We sat down on a log, our legs touching, and she leaned into me, shivering. I automatically put my arms around her, trying to make her warmer. She snuggled deeper into me, and sighed.  
"I'm so sorry." I said, breaking our silence.  
"Don't be. I'm just glad you're back." She said softly.  
"Did you get the letter?" I asked her. She drew random shapes and lines with her feet in the sand, having removed her boots.  
"Yes." She said after a while.  
"Bella I-I'm so sorry. You don't have too- I don't know. Just ignore what I said. I just-" I stuttered, but she cut me off.  
"And I love you too." She said, sounding quite sure of herself. I froze, literally.  
"Wait, what?" I asked.  
"I love you too, Edward. You've always been everything to me, and you know it." She said, looking up at me from where she was huddled on my chest. Suddenly, she stood up quickly, and looked me in the eyes, her bare feet curling over the cold sand. My heart was beating faster than usual as I stood up too and she slowly and with obvious determination stepped closer and stood on her tip-toes, her hands resting on my shoulders. I hesitantly placed mine on her slender waist and almost sighed out loud. They felt so right there, so protective and wanting. Her mouth turned up in a strange sort of half smile before she brought her face closer to mine and pressed her soft lips to mine. It was a gentle kiss, like a first one, and we moved as one but still cautiously. Surprisingly, she lead. We broke apart after a while and I sat down on the sand with my back against the log. She sat in between my legs and rested her head on my chest.  
"Are you sure?" I whispered to her. "Don't do this to make me happy, Bells."  
"I am sure with every ounce of myself." She said. It was silent for a while. "Does it make you happy?" She asked.  
"You make me happier than anything in the world." I told her, and she turned herself around, kissing me again. I had a hand in her curls and one on her waist. She both her arms wrapped around my neck so tightly it almost hurt. The amazing thing was that it wasn't weird in any way. It felt right, perfect, like the whole world had turned to caramel.

**:)**

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	27. Chapter 24 Beautiful

**HEY GUYS! This may or may not be the last chapter, I might do an epilogue. But I just want to say THANK YOU for reading this whole time, and sticking with me. Thank you to those who reviewed and made my stomach go fuzzy and warm :) I really really really appreciate it.  
Here you go.  
**

BELLA POV  
I wake up and feel a pair of strong arms around me. I smile, turning towards the owner of those arms. His bronze hair is sticking up all over the place, his light lavender purple eyelids closed. There's a smile on his face. I spend a few more minutes revelling in the warmth of his embrace, his strong muscles against my back and wrapped around my waist. I lace my fingers through his hair, the soft velvet of it intertwines around them, caressing all the folds and lines of skin. He doesn't wake up, just breaths a soft sleepy sigh. His smell is like nothing else in the world, sort of like the sun. I breathe it in gratefully and just sit there comfortably, feeling his ribs and chest fall up and down with the rhythm of his breath. My feet are touching his, our toes face to face. This moment is perfect and still, the sun rising outside my window. The real world isn't awake yet. It's just us in our own little secret place, and it seems like it could never end. Memories of the night before flood into my mind, and I let them come, closing my eyes again and watching them like television, grinning. I open my eyes again and there are his staring at me. Wonderful forests of jade green, flecked with gold and framed with the most wonderful eyelashes in the world. He smiles at me, I smile at him. This moment seems like what my whole life has been leading up to. I feel clean, whole, cleared of any worry or imperfection or nagging feeling. There are no thoughts running through my head but how perfect he is.  
"Good morning, beautiful." He says, and for the first time in my life, I feel beautiful, because I feel like me. I didn't always feel that way, but I feel that way now. When somebody just loves you, and when you make somebody happy, when your presence seems to make them happy, you suddenly feel like the most beautiful person in the world.

**:)**


	28. Epilogue

Hey guys! I just wanted to say thank you so much and I love all of you for reading my story, giving me advice, reviewing and everything! It's so awesome to have someone tell you they like what you're writing. So thanks again. Here's what everyone wanted…or so I hope.

**xoxo**

~EPILOGUE~

A little girl of about 4 sat on the front steps of her house, examining her new shoes in front of her. Her ringlets of brown hair fell around her face in a messy way, her big brown eyes contemplated the buckles and snaps on her feet. A little boy of about the same age with striking bronze coloured hair was kicking a soccer ball around lazily on the grass. He sat down where he was, heaving a sigh. It was a hot day for Forks, Washington. The little girl walked over and sat herself beside the little boy, smiling.

"Let's look at clouds." He said to her. She agreed, and lay down on her back, their forearms pressed close together.

"I see an elephant, just there!" She pointed at a fluffy looking ball of white hanging high above them. He screwed up his face in concentration, trying to see what she saw.

"I don't see it. I see a bucket pouring water." He said, tilting his head to one side and opening his green eyes wider.

"I see it." She said simply. They lay like this for a while more, the little boy humming a song he had thought up. A simple, happy sounding five-note melody. Just then, an older looking boy of about 6 strolled outside. He looked very much like the little girl. He waved cheerily at the two younger children before running down the street and meeting up with a group of friends to play a game they had been planning for days.

The little girl sighed.

"Edward, this isn't very fun." She said, sitting up. He sat up too, his mouth drooping into a frown.

"I know." He said. They sat, wondering what to do for a while, before the little boy roared loudly. It startled the little girl, but soon she was into the little boys game. They crawled around on their hands and knees, roaring and being lions, fierce kings and queens of the savannah. They tackled antelopes, they chased safari jeeps, they pretended to bask in the African sun. Occasionally the lions would have a brawl, tumbling and rolling and tickling each other's sides, pretending to bite and scratch. No one would win in the end. After a while, the little boy sat back down, breathing heavily. The little girl plopped down beside him. They grinned breathlessly at each other, tired from running around. Being lions was tough work. The sun was starting to go down, and they pretended one last time before the day was out that they were lions, sitting on their own pride rock, watching the sunset over their land. A lady with a kind face and caramel coloured hair opened the screen door, and called out to the children.

"Bella, Edward! Come in now." She said. With a sense of disappointment, the two children stood up and brushed the grass of the seat of their pants. They threw their arms over each other's shoulders and marched into the house, their stomachs rumbling and their knees stained green.

Later, the little girl was just falling asleep, the little boy beside her. He was already sleeping, his eyes closed gently and his breathing calm and even. The little girl thought about their game. She thought about their dinner. She thought about all the random things that run through your head while you're trying to get to sleep. She closed her eyes, trying again. Finally, her thoughts started slowing down, her breathing deeper. Finally, she was slipping into dreams. But before she was unreachable, one last thought made it's way into her brain. She loved a little boy very very much. Even more than she loved herself.

A girl of about ten was poised at the bottom of a set of stairs, her muscles tense and ready to go. Her brown hair was in a ponytail and she was wearing light brown shorts and a yellow shirt. A boy of about the same age was arranged in the same position beside her. He looked over at her and grinned wickedly. She grinned back.

"Ready?" Asked a man with a crinkly smile, seated at the kitchen table, just off to the side of the stairs. The both nodded in unison. "Go!" He called, and the boy and the girl took off, making their way up the stairs as quickly as they could, running hopping and skipping steps. This was apparently a common activity for the two. When they reached the top, they turned on a dime and bolted back down. The boy with green eyes halted first at the bottom, with the girl following very closely behind. "Edward wins." The man announced. The girl looked momentarily disgruntled, before smiling widely again.

"Rematch!" She said eagerly. The boy nodded fervently. The man, who looked like the girls father, rolled his eyes and chuckled.

"Okay." He said, and the two arranged themselves in their starting positions once more. "Go!" The man called again. They raced up and down, up and down, up and down, stopping finally when the girl announced she was tired.

An hour or so later, the pair was seated on the couch, watching a film called Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. The girl was leaning into the boy's side, but this was nothing unusual. Her legs were sore from doing the stairs so many times and the boy's feet were cramping, but they still laughed at the jokes on the screen. The girl looked up at the boy, her best friend, her other half, and smiled. She loved him very very much. Even

more than she loved herself.

The girl and the boy are now about 15, and they are sitting at a beach, somewhere sunny and warm. They are on vacation in Florida for a week. The beach is crowded and full of little kids making sandcastles. There are families and people everywhere. The girl is lying down on her striped towel in her bathing suit, trying to get some colour on her fair skin. The boy is doing the same, his skin even whiter than hers, but with muscles almost fully developed on his stomach. He passes her a book, and she begins to read her part. They are sharing the reading of a textbook, studying for some test they will miss while on vacation. The older boy from before runs by, his hair wet and sandy, pursued by a boy with blond hair, who is flinging gobs of sand at him.

"Common denominator is?" The girl asked, the book shielding her face from the sun. The boy made a face of concentration, feeling the rays of sun beat down on his body.

"A quantity into which all the denominators of a set of fractions may be divided without a remainder." The boy answered, having memorized an answer from the book before hand.

"Good." The girl said, handing him back the large book. He closes it and sets it down beside him. He stands up, and offers his hand to the girl. She takes it, and the two of them go down to the warm looking water, and dive in fearlessly. The water is silky and salty, so unlike the water of the ocean that they are used too. The boy splashes the girl, laughing evilly, but she gets him back, dunking his head. He grabs her around the waist with both his arms and flings her as far as he can into the water. When she doesn't resurface straight away he swims quickly over. She pops her head up, giggling, and the boy lets out a sigh of relief. Thank god she's okay. He loved a girl very very much. Even more than he loved himself.

"Edward don't!" Bella shrieked, her voice muffled by blankets. He tickled her mercilessly. He knew all her weak spots. Mencius once said that friendship is one mind in two bodies, and if that statement has been proved true by Bella and Edward for years. He let's her go and kisses her on the lips. She responds eagerly, and when the kiss is finished, they lay back down on her bed.

The way he makes her feel is like, smelling fresh cut grass or being in the back of a convertible. Or returning home from a long trip. It's like the feeling you get when you get an 'A' on your report card and your parents tell you how proud they are. Or when you hear your family laugh together or the whooshing of a tunnel when you drive with the windows down. It's like when you're outside on a hot summer day and you have a cold glass of water. It's like the feeling you get when you hear your favorite childhood song on the radio for the first time in years, you turn it up and feel so alive. Or laying in bed watching a snow storm, knowing you don't have to get up for hours and just get to in the warmth of your comforters.

She knows it's real because of the way her stomach flip flopped during her first true kiss with him, or when she drives around in the front seat of his car, and even though she should feel scared beyond control because he's driving so fast and stupid, she feels so safe and alive.

He knows it's real because he just feels so pristine and happy and perfect in this moment that he wouldn't change it for the world.

She snuggles up closer to him and closes her eyes, thinking that there is nothing like an embrace from him, nothing like fitting her face into the curve of his shoulder and filling her lungs with the scent of him. She breathes in gratefully, and as he strokes her hair gently, she kisses his nose.

"I love you even more than I love myself." She says to him, and he smiles peacefully, gathering her up in his arms even tighter.

"Me too." He says.

THANK YOU

**xox**


End file.
